I'll find you in another world
by Supergirl waiting for Reamonn
Summary: When human dies they go to Soul Society. But when shinigami dies, they go where?...Could they go to the real world? Follow Rukia as she would do anything to be with Byakuya again. -Story on hiatus until A frozen ocean of rain is complete
1. Prologue

**Hi there, byaruki fans! here is an another story focused mainly on Rukia and Byakuya. Who knows? If you have the time, maybe you could give it a try. You'll get to see Byakuya in all the possible ways... Child...teenager...adult...cold... annoyed...gentle... strong...spoiled... and so on...**

**I must announce you from the begging. I'm not a native english speaker so problems such as grammar and spellings might appear. So don't go hard on me with this one... :)**

**Secondly... after reading this you might be a little confused and put questions such as "why Byakuya's son have amber colored eyes?" "Who is Nanakuma?" and so on... That is because this story will be connected as some point ( or better the sequel) with a another story on which i'm working on right now ( A frozen ocean of rain). That story started as an ichigo xrukia but it seems that it's becoming more of a byakuya x rukia... Who knows, maybe if you have the time you could also visit it! :) ... (But pretty please if at some point you are tempted to review it, try to avoid spoilers!)**

** - oh! and of course... I don't own bleach...or anything that goes within. **

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_**I'll find you in a another world**_

_**Prologue**_

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"_That child! Why wouldn't he respect the rules? Why wouldn't he obey his parents_?" Byakuya thought as he shuno-ed as fast as he could out of Seireitei. It was the middle of the night and lately, near the 12th and 13th Districts of Rukongai, missions were sent by the Gotei 13 in order to eliminate the presence of some big hollows. For a shinigami of his level it didn't even worth the bother but since his legal son found himself smart enough to disobey the interdiction of involving himself in fights of any kind until he will graduate from the Shinigami Academy, Byakuya needed to get him there out of there before he could get hurt.

He already started to sense the presence of the hollows and somewhere among them, a reiatsu he knew so well. It was a strange mixture between the chilly winter breeze and the force of the moon. Nothing of a true Kuchiki…but it was nonetheless his son. He felt that strong but uncontrolled and untrained power of the boy's zanpakuto…and he felt his fear. '_That reckless child_!' Byakuya growled in his thoughts and tried to increase his speed. He could almost see him…and that enormous hallow preparing the crash its target. The boy was frozen and Byakuya knew that the shock was not giving him the time to attack. He also knew that himself, he didn't have the time to release Senbonzakura in its shikai form. He had only one second left and he could watch the boy get killed or he could…

But there was no time for thinking in that moment as some choices are made long before they could even been born. _"It must be fate_…" Byakuya thought in that one second he had left.

He just drew out his zanpakuto and shonpo-ed right in front of the hollow's fangs…right in front of his son.

And that one second was gone.

The boy's face turned white as the recognized the person in front of him…and as he couldn't understand why that person… the strongest he had ever known was torn apart by the hollow's fangs.

Byakuya clinched his fists on the handle of his zanpakuto and stabbed as hard as he could the hollow while the blood kept soaking his clothes. He just didn't have the time to avoid the hollow's fangs. To protect the boy he had to kill the hollow by putting himself between the two of them. He knew, before he could drew out his zanpakuto that he will only have the time to kill the hollow but not to avoid it…

'_I came too late_…' he thought and as she couldn't feel anymore his right arm, he dropped Senzonzakura.

He raised his chin and faced the boy: A pair of amber eyes he knew so well long before they were born. That amber color was nothing of a Kuchiki, but the boy was nonetheless his son.

'_Indeed…until the very end you were my son… Just as I promised_.." he thought and a smile full of pain appeared on his face, already stained with blood.

The boy still in shock started to tremble and out of his mouth only one word could came out repeatedly:

"Why?...Why?...Why?...Why?..."

But Byakuya couldn't answer to that question, because he had never lent himself to reply to stupid questions. He sensed the hollow's presence disintegrating and as he fell on his knees he felt relieved. After all he had arrived in time: his son remained unharmed…

He lift his chin once again to see the boy:

"Ichirou…why don't you listen to your parents… ever?" he managed to say.

Instantly the boy's eyes were filled with tears.

"Ichirou… a Kuchiki never cries…" Byakuya whispered as all the strength he had left was leaving him.

But the boy couldn't help but cry.

'_I see_…' Byakuya told himself '_This must be the fate_…'

After that he closed his eyes and felt unconscious.

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"_Could this be impossible?...Or would they name it 'dishonor'? …To have the captain of the 6__th__ squad and the leader of the Kuchiki clan killed by one single hollow? ... They would know better if their hearts will doubt, because I have nothing to be ashamed of. To have myself killed in order to protect my son… that is a prideful way to die._

_I am not permitted to have regrets because against fate I am not allowed fight… but since in death there is nothing I can take with me, I am afraid to forget her name or her face… _

_It seems that until the very end I'm clinging on her memory… And randomly as my whole existence passes in front of my eyes I can only see clearly the day on which I proposed her._

_Do you remember? It was the evening on which we were coming back from the Nanakuma's son wedding… the one on which you put so much effort to plan._

_Back then I was thinking of the strange warm feeling of spending a perfect day…and that somehow I wished to allow myself the selfishness of having to rest of my existence comprised by days like that one…_

_._

_ Flashback _

"Okaerinasai, Kuchiki-sama, Rukia-sama!" the servants greeted the lord and the lady of the house.

"Tadaima!" Rukia replied cheerful. "I'm exhausted, Mariko!" she added as she went ahead and passed by her personal maid. "But it was worthy! Even the chappies were a success! Miss Shokun… I mean lady Nanakuma was so happy to receive the plushy! I wish Ichigo could be there, only to see that the chappies were a success! " There is no way you can give that weird stuffed animal as a remember gift!" that's what he told me…but what does he know? How many weddings did he plan before?... Oh, Mariko! I'm so tired in this moment; you know, fighting hollows it's easier than facing a Kuchiki wedding! I'm glad Nii-sama was by my side all the time or else I wouldn't have been able to go thought with it!"

The maid smiled amused and made a bow.

"Would you like to serve you the dinner in the garden?"

"Oh, no! Please… I believe that Nii-sama and I ate enough on that wedding to not be hungry for the next three days! Instead, you could serve us some green tea…"

"Understood, my lady!" the maid replied and after she made another bow she left the alley.

"Green tea I believe would be nice, right Nii-sama?" Rukia asked as she kept moving, but as no answer came to her she stopped. "Nii-sama?"

But as she turned she found Byakuya still as a stone in the middle of the alley with a strange expression on his face.

"Is everything alright?" she asked worried.

"It has been a wonderful day, Rukia…" he said with his grave voice. It was a voice that it was no longer intimidated her. It had become her most familiar sound.

"It was, Nii-sama, indeed …" she replied.

"Actually…the last 6 years have been wonderful…" he added and instantly her face turned red. She bowed her face in order to hide it.

"Nii-sama… t-there is… no need to mention it… i…" she tried to day.

"And I was wondering if all the years that have been left for us could be like them…" he continued as if she hadn't interrupted him.

She raised her face. For a second her violet eyes widened, but then a warm smile appeared on her face.

"As long as there're will be peace on this land …our lives will go on the same way as they did until now" she replied.

"Is that a promise, Rukia?"

"It is, Nii-sama…"

"I see…" he added.

A slight smile appeared on his lips and for a reason she couldn't explain, Rukia felt happy. In that moment she would have wished to ask him to smile more often…but she bit her tongue, because that would have complied her to admit that in the depth of her hearts she would have wanted him to keep all his smiles and rare moments of kindness only for her. And that would have been crazy and selfish, she thought. She sighed, prepared to tell him that she will go ahead and change her clothes…but then her eyes widened again. She saw Byakuya leaning on his knees in front of her…

" Rukia, you have forgiven all the wrong I have done to you and ever since have been my closest friend, my family…and the pride of the Kuchiki family" he begun and from his knees he completely bowed in front of her, with hands and eyes facing the ground. On that sight Rukia's heart skipped a beat.

"And for that I have nothing to repay you…"

"Nii-sama!" she hissed almost scared as she approached him. "Please get up! Please don't say such foolish things…You have already made me the heir of the Kuchiki clan… You are the one who saved my life so many times…and you have offered me a home…Please Nii-sama, get up! I am not worthy of…"

"Rukia, all the things you have received …are nonetheless the things you deserved." He continued calmly with face still facing the ground. "You are worthy of everything within this house …including me. But even it might sound strange from a man like me… I feel that I'm the one who it's not worthy of you…"

On the beginning, Rukia thought that Byakuya must have drunk too much at the party. Then she remembered that he hadn't touched a single glass of alcohol. After she heard his words she started to worried and shortly, her worries made her heart stop as she remember what Byakuya's body position meant: A leader of a clan was not simply bowing in front of women…

She put both of her little hands over her burning chest. There was only one reason for which nobles men were bowing in front of women. He was just not going to do what she was thinking he will do!

"But if your heart could ever find me worthy of you, will you accept to live together days like the one we had today for the rest of our lives? … Will you trade the status of an adopted sister for the rightful one of the Lady of the Kuchiki clan?...Will you…" but here he stops and clinches his fists for a second. "Rukia, all these years, you have been the heart I thought it stopped from beating… You have been my heart.. For a long time, I have tried to ignore it, given that you were adopted as a sister in this family… but not anymore… Rukia will you be my wife?"

A deep silence felt between them and in that moment Byakuya understood that these thoughts and crazy wishes of him should have been kept forever locked in the depth of heart. But then, as he wanted to turn back time and remain silent, he felt a pair of small hands raising his face from the ground. He raised his eyes and saw Rukia in her knees, crying next to him.

"I will…Nii-sama" she said as tears kept falling. "I will… but don't you ever bow like this in front of anyone …ever!"

And after she said that, she took him in to her arms and embraced him with all her strength. That should have been their moments of intimacy, but all the stuff of the house was on the porch watching the scene with astonishment_."_

_ End Flashback _

_._

_I have always wondered why you cried in that moment… because back then, it had been the first time I had ever seen your tears. I feared a little that night, because you might have accepted me only because you would never refuse me… But now, at the very end, I must confess that I had never felt warmer and human in my life, than when I was next to you in our married years… so I believe that in the end I made my way to your heart. Or at least I want to believe that… _

_As I want to believe that I lead properly my family… _

_As I want to believe that I fulfilled my shinigami duties…_

_As I want to believe that I lived prideful my existence…_

_Now, everything seems to fade away… my body… my thoughts…my entire existence…_

_I cannot be sad…a Kuchiki must face the death prideful…and I cannot be worried since I leave everything I own with her… but if it were to be, I would have two wishes:_

_To be able to take her memory with me… and to not have her shedding tears in my absence…"_

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_**Soo... what about an honest opinion?**  
_

_**PS: Thank you in advance for reading!**_


	2. The funeral

**Well that's a soon update! Second chapter's already out! Enjoy! **

**Please mind the spelling mistakes. I will try to review it once again a little later.**

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**Chapter 2**

**The Funeral**

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Rukia's eyes were so full on anger that her violet irises seemed to turn black. She tried as hard as she could to keep herself together since in front of her was her son, her very first born, and not a stranger. But if he would have been a stranger, he would have been dead by now.

"You went to the 12th District all alone?" she shouted. "You thought you were so cool that you could kiss the ass of 15 hollows all by yourself when you can't even master your shikai?! Tell me, Ichirou! Tell me, could you get more stupid then this?!"

The young man bowed his amber eyes. And strands of his dark but ruffled hair cover covered his forehead.

"Why couldn't you listen to your father for once?" she shouted.

At the sound of these words the boy lift his eyes and he faced his mother with a strange expression:

"He is not my father…" he hissed.

Rukia's eyes widened and as she couldn't control her anger anymore… she just slapped the boy over his face.

"How dare you?" she growled. "The man, who's laying now on the edge of death, could not be deafened in this life by any Espadas or Vandenreich…yet he chose to let himself torn apart by a single hollow in order to protect you! Because ever since you were born he had never stopped for a second to call you 'son'! How dare you not to call him father?

The boy again bowed his face. The man who was laying on the edge of death was not his father. He didn't want to believe that. That thought would have killed him… that thought of knowing that his father was soaked in blood because of…him. 'No, he was not his father! He couldn't be! Because he didn't want to take the responsibility of being his son. It was a burden to heavy for his heart.

"How can you be such a spoiled child?" Rukia added trying to keep her anger, but her voice started to crack.

"Mother, i…" he tried to day, but in that moment the door of the room was opened in hurry and two persons, a servant man and a young girl with black hair and grey eyes appeared. The girl entered the room without permission and threw herself in Rukia's arms:

"Oka-san! Oka-san! The girls mumbled as her face was soaked in tears. "Oto-san…Oto-san… is…"

Rukia's heart skipped a beat.

"Haruna!..." she hissed. " What happened with your father?... Haruna!"

But the girl was so shocked that she couldn't answer. Rukia's face turned white as she put away from her waist the hands of her daughter.

"Ichirou…Take your sister." Rukia said with a cold, emotionless voice. It was the voice that made her sound so much like him.

Ichirou took the crying Haruna in his arms and watched his mother with a worried expression as she calmly made a few steps to the door and then disappeared in a shunpo.

Rukia stopped her flash step in front of a door which was still giving her thrills, every time she was trying to open it. She reached her hand trying to slide it, but then she stopped as a strange feeling overwhelmed her. The silence was all around her…and the smell of sakura was gone.

'_No, it can't be_…' she told herself.

She slid the door and entered the room. In on opposite side, in front of the window, she saw him. Holding her breath she advanced…even thought every step was a pierce into her heart.

"Rukia-sama…" a voice was heard from behind.

With a white expression she turned. It was the healer of the Kuchiki family. Taken directly from the 4th squad. As gifted as Unohana. One of the best. He had a sorrowful expression on his face, but she couldn't worry for anything… this man was indeed one of the best healers.

"Rukia-sama…" the man repeated.

Rukia blinked dumbfounded.

"Tell me, Setsu-sama… how will it take for my husband to heal completely?

The healer looked at her speechless…and in that moment, tears started to fall from her eyes. She turned to Byakuya and with a flash step she reached his futon. His body was covered with bandages stained by blood, but his face, with closed eyes made him look as if he had fallen into a restful sleep.

"I am sorry, Rukia-sama… His body couldn't take these new wounds… When he got himself involved in this last fight, the wounds from the mission in Hueco Mondo were far from being healed. His organs were already squashed when he tried to stop the hallow."

"Shhhhh!" hissed Rukia annoyed and she lift a trembling finger. "You're making too much noise! Byakuya sleeps right now… He must be so tired. I'll watch him from now on. You may go! Thank you for the good work!..."

The healer's eyes widened worried as he saw Rukia leaning on her knees in front of Byakuya and putting her face on his shoulder.

"Rukia-sama…" the man tried to say again. " This it's not the time to lose your senses…"

But Rukia, deaf to all the healer's words, kept watching Byakuya. She was slowly started to pat his chin.

The man sighed and approached her.

"Before he passed out he wished your son to have this…" he added leaving two small objects next to the futon. Rukia didn't make any movement and finally the healer left the room.

When she found herself alone with Byakuya she lifted her head from his shoulder and looked at the objects:

"Kenseikan… two of them…" she whispered. " You want me to give them to our son?... Despite all our efforts I am not sure he will accept them… and above all isn't it a little too soon for us to choose the heir of the clan?"

She turned to Byakuya, but his face was the same as a few minutes ago: lifeless. Tears started to fall again from her eyes.

" And also isn't it a little too soon for you to leave me?... We were supposed to have a marriage that will last 100 years…or even 200 years…"

She dropped the kenseikan and let herself fall over his body as all the pain clustered in to her heart started to crush the world she had build with him…

At that late hour, in the Kuchiki manor no one was sleeping. Even if someone would have slept, he certainly would have been woken up by the piercing and painful scream that came out from Buyakuya's dorm.

At the sound of that scream, everything froze ….the house…the servants… the two children…the time itself.

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The next day, the Kuchiki manor was filled by a muffled agitation. The servants were sneaking among all the unexpected guests: the Elders of the Kuchiki clan and members from Gotei 13th: Ukitake, Kyoraku, Unohana and Renji. The two young Kuchiki were standing dumbfounded in the corner watching the scene before their eyes as a bad theatre play.

Ukitake approached the teenagers. Ichirou had a expression full of anger and guilt, while Haruna was too horrified to understand what happened last night.

"Ichirou…" the captain begun. "Shouldn't you better take your sister to her room?"

The young man turned to Ukitake with a frown on his forehead.

"Mom will blame this on me…" he said.

Ukitake's eyes widened worried.

" Ichirou… no one will blame …" the captain tried to say.

"But it is my fault!" the boy shouted. "He told me not to leave the manor!... It's me the one who killed him!"

Hearing these words, his sister burst in tears again. Ukitake made a sign to a servant who was passing by to take the two teenagers to their rooms.

Unohana who watched the scene approached her subordinate, the healer of the Kuchiki manor.

"Setsu, how is Rukia-san handling this situation?"

The healer bowed his face sorrowful.

"Unfortunately she had lost it. She had locked herself in the room with the Lord. She doesn't let anyone to enter saying that the Lord need to rest in order to recover. When I tried to tell her that he is already dead she attacked me with kido."

"I see…" Unohana stated. " We must find a way to make her regain her senses. In three days Kuchiki-sama's body will disintegrate and until then the funeral must be accomplished."

She turned her eyes to Renji who was standing quietly in a corner of the room. She slowly approached him.

"Abarai-san…" she begun.

Renji raised his eyes and faced him with a painful expression.

"Abarai-san, please, try to talk with Rukia-san…" the women said.

"She won't listen to me…" he simply stated.

"If she won't listen to you…there is no other person in Seireitei she would listen to…"

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Doubtfully, Renji knocked on his ex-captain's room.

"I will not receive visits of any kind in this moment" the voice of Rukia answered from inside. That voice was so strange that Renji barely recognized.

"Rukia… it's me, Renji…"

"Oh!..." she stated. "Well ,come in Renji!"

With trembling hands he pulled the door.

"Hi, Renji!" she greeted him with a smile. Renji stopped in the threshold. Her smile was as scary as it showed clearly that she had lost her rationality. "Have you come to visit Byakuya?"

Renji hesitated to answer a few times as he was trying to pick his words carefully.

"I came to see you…" he finally said.

"Oh…I see…" she said and turned to Byuakuya putting her hear over his chest. "I'm sorry Renji, but I don't have the time to drink with you today. As you see… Byakuya is injured and I must stay by his side…"

Renji slowly approached. He stopped in front of that terrifying sight of a mad Rukia clinging over a corpse. His eyes then slowly moved to the dead person's face: It was the person he had always tried to surpass… the person he had hated and admired at the same time for so long. How could he even die from such a stupid accident? How could everything end up this way?...

"Rukia…" Renji tried to say.

"Shhhh!..." she whispered. "You're talking to loud and you'll wake him up!"

Renji's eyes widened.

"Rukia, there is nothing that could wake him up now!" he shouted.

Rukia suddenly raised her head from the corpse and turned to him with menacing eyes.

"_I said you're talking to loud_!" she growled.

"Rukia come to your senses! He is already dead!"

Rukia's eyes widened for a second but the she lift her hand:

"Hado no 31…Shaka…" she shouted, but before she could finish the spell he seized her hands and forcibly took her in his arms. She struggled for a couple of seconds but then she gave in.

"Rukia…please be strong…for the sake of your children…" he whispered as he couldn't help but stare at the dead Byakuya. He held Rukia strongly.

"He is not dead…." She hissed. "He can't be…"

He felt his clothes wet from her tears.

"He is one of the strongest persons I know… Kuchiki Byakuya can't just die…"

"Rukia, the funeral must take place before his body will disappear." Renji said.

" He had a squad to rule… and this family…no, there is no way he could die! He cannot!"

"Rukia…"

"I will not allow it! Never!..."

"Rukia… I'm begging…" he whispered.

"He is my husband!" she shouted and then tears drowned her words.

Renji clinched his fists. "Husband"… even after all these years, when he was calling him that way, his stomach ached him.

"Yes… he is…your husband" he finally managed to say. "And that's why he needs a proper funeral…"

Rukia hid her face in his clothes and started to scream again.

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It was afternoon. The Elders as the members of the Gotei 13 were still in the main room of the Kuchiki manor. The only ones who had left were Unohana and Kyoraku. At some point the doors opened and Renji appeared in the threshold. Shortly behind him Rukia Kuchiki also made her appearence. Her looks were careless and slack. Her hair was undone, her clothes crumpled… but what was even more worrisome was the expression of her eyes. Those tenacious and strong eyes were now empty and lifeless.

Ukitake lift from his chair and the others also turned to Rukia. She looked at them for a second then she spoke with a low and emotionless voice:

"In two days from now the funeral of Lord and Captain Kuchiki Byakuya will held place… Please let all the people in Seireitei know this. Until then I will kindly ask you to leave this rooms and let my family do the preparations."

After she said that she looked around her a few times:

"Mariko…Mariko…" she whispered. "Where is Mariko?"

The tiny maid immediately appeared in front of her.

"Take all my clothes expect from the wedding kimono and paint them in black" she ordered with a tired voice.

The maid looked at her with a painful expression but as she knew she couldn't argue her orders, especially in that moment, she made a bow and disappeared.

Then Rukia turned to Renji:

"You , too… you may go now…"

Renji looked at her distrustful, but as he also felt that he couldn't argue with her, he left the room along with the others.

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Two days later, during the morning a tiny women covered in black from head to toes was watching over the corpse of Lord Kuchiki Byakuya. She was alone and in her lap she was holding Senbozakura and two kenseikans. Her fingers were bleeding as she had pawed so many times the blade imagining that it was her husband's soft skin.

Then the door was opened and two old men appeared in the threshold.

"We are ready, Rukia-sama…" one of them said.

"I see…" she answered and got up from the chair. She approached her husband. Her heart was still turning apart at the sight of his lifeless face, but since all her tears ran dry there was nothing that could express her pain anymore. She leaned over him and slightly touched his lips. Then she approached his ears and whispered: "Don't worry, I'll find you in another world…"

She turned to the two Elders.

"You may take him…"

The funeral was consisted by a long walk on which all the acquaintances of the Kuchiki household were accompanying the corpse until the top Sokyoku Hill . There, the body was to disintegrate in order to become a part of the Soul Society. Rukia was at the top of the cortege followed by her children, the Elders, noble familes and Gotei 13. It could have been easily said that the entire Seireitei was taking part of that funeral.

Rukia dressed in black, looked like a ghost. A true god of death, expect that she was helpless in front of the death itself. She was walking silently beside the coffin holding her husband's zanapakuto. The blade was slowly starting to crumble.

When they arrived all at the top of the hill. Rukia looked once again at Byakuya's sleeping face and then took out his cracked zanpakuto. She turned to the crowed and said:

"You may all remember that this was Kuchiki Byakuya…the 28th leader of the noble Kuchiki clan…and the Captain of the 6th Division. The pride and the strength of my family, of my children and of my heart."

She bowed her face and as she strongly held the zanpakuto she spoke:

'For the last time… _Shire Senbonzakura'_

In that moment, the zanpakuto brutally broke in thousands of blades, filling the blue sky with pink sakura petals. Along with the sword, Rukia's heart also broke in thousands of pieces. With all the strength she had left she reached out her hand and cached in her fists a couple of pink blades.

"Nii-sama…" She whispered. "Byakuya…"

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* * *

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The funeral was over. The crowed started to disperse. The only ones left in the place from which Byakuya disappeared were Rukia and her two children. Haruna approached her and clanged on her clothes while she was still crying.

"My poor baby…" Rukia whispered as she took her in to her arms. "Tears won't fit a Kuchiki, isn't what your dad would tell you if he would be here?"

The girl raised her face from her mother's clothes.

"You have the same eyes as him…" she whispered. "I wonder how many times I have told you this… It's a bless to watch you"

Haruna strongly hugged her mother.

"Be a good girl now and go home… Mariko is waiting for you at the foot of the hill… When you'll be at home you'll see all the Elders and Gotei 13 assisting at last lunch we are giving in your father's memory… but if you don't feel alright you can retire in to your room…"

The girl nodded and let go of her mother. Then Rukia approached her son, Ichirou as she took out of her clothes the two kenseikans. When she saw her coming toward him, Ichirou painfully frowned.

"Don't look at me like this" she begun coldly. "You are my son… and I could never hate you"

She took out his hand and gave him the two kenseikans. Ichirou's eyes widened.

"This was your father's last wish. After I will retire you will take over the Kuchiki clan."

"Mother, I am not a…" the boy tried to say.

"You are a true Kuchiki… as much as your sister is, as much as I am …and as much as your father was!" she raised her voice coldly. "By giving you these kenseikans I believe that he wanted to let you know this…as much as he wanted you to not bear the blame of his death!"

"Mother…please…I cannot accept them!" he begged.

"But you will…" she stated coldly.

"I see…" he concluded. "If this will be your revenge I will accept it…"

Rukia lift her eyes full o anger.

"Revenge?... What do you mean by revenge?... You are still immature and full of yourself, just like him! She shouted.

He bit his lips as it was uncomfortable for him, every time she was mentioning _"him". _Hearing the yelling, Haruna who started to descend the hill, came back.

"If I am upset or angered in this moment it doesn't mean that I could ever hate you!...

"Oka-san, please…" Haruna begged, but Rukia ignored her, looking instead in to her son's amber eyes.

"I gave birth to you by sacrificing the happiness of other's lives…Including your father's… How could you even suspect that I or him would ever hate you? … Byakuya must have spoiled you too much! Grow up, before you open your mouth!"

"Oka-san, please ….don't anger yourself anymore…" Haruna said with a low voice as she was petting her mother's arm.

Hikaru bowed his face and took the kenseikans. As she saw them, Haruna's eyes widened for a second, and then she turned to her mother.

"Oka-san… your hand it's bleeding!" she suddenly said.

Rukia lift her right arm, which was indeed covered in blood. Then she opened her fist and showed them a couple of pink sakura blades.

"This it's all that is left of him…" she whispered. "And this it's all I'm taking with me…"

Seeing the blades, Haruna was almost burst in tears again, but Rukia immediately lift her chin.

"Have I not told you that tears will not suit you…Kuchiki princess?... Your father it's not among us anymore but that doesn't mean his whole existence has vanished. His heart was left with us and his soul was sent to another world… You could also say, that he's somewhere out there… and to meet him we'll just have to search for him …"

Haruna's eyes grey widened surprised and for the first time in 3 days, Rukia smiled.

"I'll find him…whatever it takes" she whispered in her ear, and then she turned to Ichirou. "After the memorial lunch I will leave Seireitei for a couple of days. I hope you understand what this means…" she told him in the same cold manner. The boy nodded. "Good. Now let's go home!"

.

* * *

.

Back home, among all the crowed in her house, Rukia was looking for her captain. When she finally saw him, she invited him in a room which until three days ago was Byakuya's private study. There, the moment Ukitake entered, Rukia handed him her lieutenant badge.

"What is this, Rukia?..." he asked confused.

"I'm resigning from my place as a vice captain." She simply stated.

"Rukia, there is no need for that… You can take all the time you need to recover after Byakuya's death…"

"That is the point…" she said. "I don't have the time for grieving!"

Ukitake's eyes widened.

"You know very well what it's the difference between a simple soul in Soul Sociey and a noble one, Ukitake-sama…"

" The noble ones are directly born in Soul Society, while the other ones are sent here after their death in to the real world…" the captain said.

" So that the two way of existence could find their equilibrium, after they die, humans go to Soul Society…while that noble souls are sent to the real world." Rukia concluded.

Ukitake looked at her skeptically.

"Rukia… tell me that you are not thinking of…"

"I will do whatever it takes to have him back!" she said coldly. "And with all due respect, I will do this with or without your permission!... And I'll do it right away because otherwise I will lose the track of Byakuya's soul "

"Rukia, you can't go in the real world and randomly search for Byakuya's reincarnation!"

"I can if I'll follow the track of his soul!"

"You can't do that… he doesn't have a reiatsu anymore"

"No, but I have part of his soul!" Rukia answered and showed him the pink sakura blades.

Ukitake gasped. He knew that she had made up her mind.

"And to whom are you letting your children?… and the vacant lieutenant seat?"

Rukia turned her face to the window with a melancholic expression.

"I think I know the perfect person…" she finally said.

.

* * *

.

It was already after noon and as the lunch was already over everybody went back to their duties or homes. Even Ukitake and Renji had left.

The door to Rukia's room, the one in which she slept until she got married was half opened and noises from inside were heard.

"Oka-san?" Haruna asked as she approached.

"Come in!" she replied, but as she approached, Haruna's eyes widened surprised. Her mother was dressed into a summer dress.

"Oka-san… isn't it this…?" the girls begun.

"Indeed, the dress Ichigo brought to me when he was still in high school" Rukia replied.

"But…why are you wearing it?" she asked worried.

"Because I'm going to pay him a visit…" she said.

"So are you really going mom?" he girl asked even more worried.

"I'll be back so soon that you won't even notice my absence…"

But that answer didn't please the girl.

"You promised that you'll get Oto-san back! Why are even going after that man who only caused us problems?" she shouted.

"Enough!" shouted Rukia. "I won't have this conversation today…!... No, not today!"and she approached the girl. "Please, take care of your brother while I'll be away. Alright, Haruna?... And forgive me… but I cannot bear any of these things today… I'll get Oto-san back…just give me a little time…"

.

* * *

.

At the 24th level of the Yamada's engineering company building, Kurosaki Ichigo was sitting alone in a big and bright office watching over the Tokyo panorama. He was waiting for the time to pass by. He had finished all his work but he was not planning to go home before midnight. Home, there was no one expecting for him. Things would have been differently if 16 years ago he wouldn't have made that big mistake of believing that feelings can surpass even the laws of the nature.

It's been a long time since then… and also long time since he haven't thought about Orihime… Rukia… Soul Society… Sometimes he even wondered if being a shinigami was just a dream…

"Indeed, a dream" he whispered. "…Just like the illusion …of seeing Rukia in front of me wearing the dress I've brought her in high school."

"That's not a dream you old men!" the so called illusion answered and kicked him out his comfortable seat.

When he got up from the floor Ichigo looked at her more than shocked.

"Rukia…." He hissed.

"You bet!" she answered and approached him to help him get up.

"You look… unchanged…" she said surprised.

"Well you changed a lot…"

"If you had forgotten people grow old in this world…"

"I guess growing old was also part of our deal…" she replied and approached the big window.

"What brings you here?..." he finally asked. "Weren't you supposed to have a happy marriage in Seireitei?"

"Why do I still sense jalousie when you say that?..." she said with a low voice.

"Maybe, because I haven't got over it…"

Then a few moments of silence passed between them.

"Did you finally came back?..."

She lift her eyebrows surprised.

"Isn't it a little late for you to put this question?...And also aren't you too old for me?" she replied.

"Don't start on me with the "old man" thing…Next mouth I'll be 40 and if you'll continue on this matter I think I'll start to have middle age crises"

She started to laugh.

"Then you really are an old man!"

"Weren't you Rukia the one who always told me that you are ten times older them me?"

"Does it even count?...I'm already dead…"

The silence fell again.

"Everything it's alright in Karakura?" he finally asked.

"Aham…." She answered,

"And the children…are they alright too?"

"Ahamm…"

"Then why are you back?"

"My husband is dead" she simply stated.

Ichigo's eyes widened.

"Byakuya died?!" he shouted.

"He tried to protect Ichirou from a hollow's attack… Ichirou went in the middle of the night by himself when he can't properly use his shikai."

Ichigo remained stoned.

"By the way… he had entered the Shinigami Academy. I was against it but he insisted so much that Byakuya finally gave in to his wishes… I always used to tell him, that he was spoiling the boy too much."

"Is he…Is Ichirou alright?" Ichigo asked.

"He is… so Byakuya's death wasn't In vein…" she said and she bowed her face trying to hide her painful expression. "I need your help , Ichigo…"

Ichigo lift his eyebrows.

"Mine?...What can I do?... "

"I want you to take my place in the 13th squad!" she said.

"I'm not a shinigami anymore…"

"Your powers are sealed, not gone…" she said.

"Rukia why would you want to give up to your seat? It's crazy!..."

"That's because I'll stay in the real world for a while… and look for Byakuya"

"Rukia, you told me he's dead!"

"He's been a noble soul… that means he'll reincarnate in the real world…"

"And you are going to look for him?"

"Precisely"

"And after you'll find him… you'll do what? He won't even remember you probably…"

"He won't remember me…but that won't stop me from being next to him…"

He laughed annoyed.

"So now… when you are finally free… you're starting to chase after him?"

Rukia didn't answer.

"So in the end you really cared for that guy…" he stated annoyed.

" Ichigo if you want to start with reproaches again… you'd better understand that we are part of different worlds!..." she said.

"That might be…but back then it wasn't an impediment for us to…"

"Enough, Ichigo!" she shouted with her eyes bursting into tears. "I've just lost my husband!"

Ichigo's eyes widened for a second then he turned so he won't face her.

"You know… you said it well when you noticed that I changed… I'm not the same person anymore so don't expect me to give up my job and my life to substitute your duties in Seireitei!"

"Give up your job and your life? I believe that your job it's your life. And since you are already entering your forties it sounds kind of sad."

"Even so… that it's not a sustainable reason to make me go in Seireitei…"

Rukia turned to him.

"Ichirou remained alone at home…and you know you're the only person he listens to…"

Ichigo's eyes opened wide again. A few moments of silence passed after which he said:

"When do I have to go in Seireitei?"

"As soon as you can… Because starting now I'll come back there only to visit and check on my children…"

Ichigo hissed.

"Are you really willing to put up with all this?"

"I will do whatever it takes to meet Byakyuya again…" she answered.

Ichigo smiled sadly.

"I see… that I must have been blind from the beginning to not see how much you loved him."

Rukia didn't reply. She just looked into his eyes once again and then she shounp-ed out of that place.

* * *

**Thank you in advance for reading!**

**Hope you liked it! Starting the next chapter things will cheer up a little...no more funerals and grieving! So see you next time! Until then R&R!**


	3. You should call him Byakuya

**HiHi! new chapter's out! ( i'm pretty amazed by the speed to which i'm updating this story.)**

* * *

.

_**You should call him Byakuya**_

.

Rukia left Ichigo's office with a sour taste on her mouth. From all the reunions she had ever had with him this one was from far the most…sparkless. She found him changed. Physically and also behaviorally. He was 40…he lived in Tokyo…he was a workaholic… and somehow she was the only one to blame. If she would have acknowledged this in front of him he would have certainly started to yell at her, saying something like: "That was part of the deal! I'm not regretting anything!". Indeed there are many ways to protect the beloved ones without fighting or releasing a bankai. The sacrifice of a human's life happiness was one of them. 16 years ago they both decided to sacrifice their happiness. They both agreed… they were both prepared… except for the fact that in the end, her sacrifice turned out to be more of a salvation. Her life with Byakuya turned out to be a bless …

"_So in the end you really cared for that guy_…" she remembered Ichigo's words refereeing to Byakuya.

Even though it might have sounded strange for a stranger to understand it, in reality Byakuya was a person impossible not to fall love with. It took him 50 years to open his heart in front of her, but after all the impediments were averted, he became her best friend. She smiles when she remembers… During the war's fallowing years she found herself with a lot of time at her hand to spend with Byakuya and surprisingly she had discovered they had so much in common: they both liked drawing! He was the first person who ever appreciated her Chappy. They both enjoyed quiet evenings in the garden. They shared the same sense of humor. They were both stubborn and argued a lot on small things as neither of them was willing to cede in front of the other. Indeed they were having argues, but they were differently from the ones she had with Ichigo, as she never remembered him or her to raise their voice…

.

Flashback

.

"_In the main room of the Kuchiki manor, on a early Sunday morning, all the servants stood aligned with their eyes facing the floor. In front of them still and proud, even they were both wearing night yukatas and their hair was a mess, Lord Byakuya and Lady Rukia were facing the opposite wall with concentrated expressions. An oppressive silence was filling the room and none of the servants dared to make a move or to breathe loudly. This situation has been going on for more than an hour._

"_The white will suit best…" Rukia said with a calm but firm voice._

_The servants become tensioned._

"_Pink it's more… colorful." Byakuya replied in the same manner._

_The servants bowed their faces even more._

"_White it's a classic color" Rukia added._

"_Pink it's fashionable" Byakuya replied._

"_But classic means tradition. The Kuchiki household it's very fond of tradition" she insisted with the same calm voice._

"_Also the Kuchiki household has been proudly keeping up with the latter-days innovations" he concluded emotionless._

_Rukia slowly look at Byakuya from the corner of her eye._

"_Hmmm…" she stated thoughtful and then she added "Since when?..."_

_On her last line, the atmosphere got tensioned again. Byakuya didn't answer and a slight smile appeared in the corner of her smile. _

_From the back, the servants tried to recall how they ended up in this situation from the beginning:_

_Shortly after dawn, the door of the masters' dorm was opened and all the servants were gathered with the mission of painting main room. This has been an inspiration the masters had certainly came up with during the night, as to none of the servants was aware of the renovation intention. Now, half asleep, all the army of servants was waiting for more than an hour the final call on the paint's color._

_After another long break of oppressive silence, Byakuya said with his most serious voice:_

" _We should better put a banner with Seawood Ambassador…"_

"_Chappy ought to be included also…" Rukia answered with a low but firm voice._

"…_Holding Seawood Ambassador's hand…" Byakuya added thoughtfully._

"_With a background of a flourished green field." Rukia completed._

"_Very well…" Byakuya concluded._

"_Perfect!" she added with a satisfied smile._

_Then both of them turned to the servants. Before they could say something the servants who were quite used with their… weird masters, made a deep bow answering all in choir:_

"_Understood! We'll serve you the breakfast right away and after that we'll prepare the Seawood Ambassador and Chappy banner!"_

_Right after the servants left the room and they found themselves alone, Byakuya turned to Rukia with a deep expression:_

"_Do you think we should let the servants manage the banner?"_

_Rukia gave him a worried expression._

"_I do not believe it's a trustworthy task for them…" she answered with a low voice. " I'll go get the paintbrush!"_

_._

_Endflashback_

_._

Rukia tried to smile, but her chin started to tremble. How she missed those days! She took a deep breath abstaining herself from crying. Then she raised her face looking around. '_It must be somewhere out there' _she told herself as she was scanning the faces of all the passersby. In her fist she was still holding the lasts blades of senbozakura. She was still clinging on them as they were preserving a small part of his soul. This way as these parts were trying to go back to their possessors, she could trace the trek of his reincarnation.

"_Somewhere close_…" she whispered as she felt the blades' reiatsu getting stronger. "_But I can't see him…"_

There was no trace of Byakuya. Instead the blades glowed in her hand as a woman had exit from the pharmacy across the street. Rukia's eyes fixed her. She was about thirty, tall, with long black hair. Rukia looked confused:

"Byakuya's reincarnated as a woman?!"

She didn't want to believe that. She got up from the bench she was sitting and followed the women.

She walked for a while. At the beguiling her steps were hurried as id she feared that someone was fallowing her or rather as if she was trying to escape from something. Later her speed decreased until she completely stopped. Rukia found herself following the women into a children's playground. She turned and saw the women sitting on a bench with a nervous expression. Rukia approached her from behind and saw her getting out of the pharmacy bag… a pregnancy test.

Rukia bowed her face and looked at the glowing sakura blades with a sorrowfull expression. Why was she even so disappointed?... She was expecting to find here, in a human body the Byakuya she knew so well. She thought that if she would show him the blades he would instantly recover all his memories. That she would ask Urahara to train him the same way he did with Ichigo making him release his shinigami powers. Then within month or two they would return to Seireitei and continued their happy marriage. That was her plan. But now, her plan started to fall apart as she begun to understand the real situation: Byakuya was not reincarnated in a women… Byakuya was inside of that women's body as a baby! She strongly bit her lips. Why was she even surprised?... It was only normal to reincarnate in a newborn. Her desperate desire to see him had obstructed her to notice such an obvious truth.

She turned to the woman who was watching skeptically the pregnancy test. It was not as if a small detail like Byakuya being a baby will make her back off.

"I don't think there would be any need for that!" she suddenly said and causing the women to startle.

Scared she turned to the direction from which the voice was heard and saw a mignonne brunette lady.

"H-h-huh?" she managed to mumbled.

"I sad that you won't be needing this" Rukia calmly repeated herself showing the test.

The women blinked confused.

"You're already pregnant!" Rukia concluded and approached the other side of the bench, the one on which the women sat. "May I?" Rukia asked untroubled and took the sit next to her.

The woman was still blinking.

"I've had two children. Believe me, I know how a pregnant woman looks… and _you_ are pregnant!" Rukia added with a friendly voice.

The women's eyes widened, but as she found the explanation of the mignonne lady making sense, she bowed her face with bashful smile. Slowly as she turned her eyes to the pregnancy test a slight sadness embraced her.

"If what you say it's true… then I don't know how I will get through this. This is the worst time for me to have a baby…with Shoji now away and… Oh, sorry! I'm starting to complain about my problems in front of a stranger!" the women said with a guilty look.

Rukia smiled at her.

"Yet, sometimes strangers could be the best listeners… Furthermore, sometimes secrets could be safer with them with friends or acquaintances…"

The women frowned suspiciously.

"What are you? Some kind of a guarding angel of something… appearing out of nowhere when I'm in trouble?" she asked.

RUkia smiled again.

"You could say so…" she whispered knowing that the woman was not far from the truth since she was a shinigami.

The women sight. After a few moments of silence she began to spoke:

"Me and Shoji we've been together for 3 years now… a child won't be a problem, except from the fact that he had left the country for two years. He has this big company he's working at and they sent him to the States. It was a huge opportunity and he couldn't miss it. He promised that by the time he will get back we will marry and start a family… but two years are a lot, you understand?.. Anything could happen and I can't afford to have a baby on my own…"

Rukia turned her eyes to the children who were running in the playground.

"Children in most of the cases mean sacrifice, but in the end they turned out to be a bless. When I was pregnant with my first child I was in the crappiest situation. I was so scared that at some point I also thought of getting rid of it… but from that time until now I have never regretted keeping it"

"But to give birth to a child and not be able to raise it… it's not a sacrifice from the mother but a crime!" the women said referring to herself..

Rukia turned to her.

"When I was a child I was abandoned… my sister who was my only family didn't have the ways to raise me…Abandoned you could say that I wouldn't have stand a chance and yet I was adopted by a noble family and later by hard work I became the lieutenant of the 13th …" but here Rukia stopped with a polite smile as she knew she couldn't talk about her shinigami life.

'_Noble… Lieutenant_?' thought the women confused.

"Are you in the army?" she asked, although she found the possibility was slight given her mignonne and feminine appearance.

"Yeah… you could say so…" Rukia answered, displaying the same polite smile.

The women cocked her eyebrows surprised. Then Rukia turned again her gaze to the playful children.

"Why don't you put the problem in a different light?" she finally said. "What if the child that you'll have will become something big one day? An important leader who will prevent a big war or I don't know what else…. Would you refuse to the world the birth of a big personality?"

The women laughed amused at that perspective.

"Yet… I don't have the ways to have a baby on my own. I don't have enough money for a babysitter and I cannot afford to stay at home and raise it… My family can't help me, since mom it's living on the other side of the country and furthermore she has this rheumatism problem that it's not allowing her to move at ease…"

"In other words you need help!" Rukia said with a cheerful smile.

"You bet!" the women replied honestly.

"Then I'll help you!"

The woman turned to her confused. She found strange for such an offer to come from a stranger she had just met.

"But weren't saying that you work for the army?" she said trying to be polite.

"Well… I resigned…" Rukia answered.

The women looked at her with disbelief. '_Maybe she wasn't in the army from the beginning…She's too short for that. What if she used to work for the secret services?'_ she told herself.

Rukia smiled, amused by that distressful expression.

"So I should take that you don't need my help…"

"I didn't say that…" the women replied with guilt. "It's just that i…I mean…I'm not even leaving in this town…I'm here to see a friend… I cannot see how you could help me…"

"Distance it's not a problem for me…" Rukia said smiling.

The women raised her eyebrows again.

"Weren't you saying that I'm a guarding angel? Imagine that I live far enough for you to can't reach me, but instead I can reach you in a second, every time you'd need help" Rukia added.

The women looked at her with a straight face.

"I was kidding!" Rukia replied and got a pen from her pocket. She took the pregnancy test from the women's lap and begun to write on the box. "Here, whenever you feel like, you can reach me at this address"

The woman took the box: "Urahara shop, Karakura town?"

'_Maybe she's a merchandiser… Urahara it's her name_?' she though.

"If you don't want my material help you can at least write me at this address whenever you need a friendly advice. Believe me I know a lot when it comes to children. I have two, remember?"

"You look so young for having children…" the women couldn't help but notice.

"I'm not, trust me!" Rukia replied. " I guess that… army keeps me in shape!"

'_So, she is in the army after all'_ she thought.

"You know, I'm sure you'll have wonderful child!" Rukia suddenly said. " A wonderful boy to be more precise"

The women slightly laughed.

"What makes you so sure of that?"

"Strong women have boys as firsts born…" Rukia replied with a tangled expression.

The women laughed again.

"That's such a bull…!" she commented.

Rukia tried to hide a smile.

"Which part? The one with you having a boy… or the one on which you being a strong women?"

"Both I guess!" she said as she continued to laugh.

"But you truly are a strong women… otherwise he wouldn't have chosen you…" Rukia said with a strange glare which made her laugh disappear.

"And what makes you so sure about that?" she said with a serious expression.

Rukia smiled cheerfully in response.

"If I'd say that it's my guardian angel feeling would you believe it?"

"Hardly" the woman answered displaying a new smile. "But still… this guardian angel has a name?"

Rukia turned her face, piercing the women with her violet eyes.

"It's Kuchiki Rukia" she replied and then got up from the bench. "Promise me you'll give that child a chance!"

The women's eyes widened.

"And trust me… It's a boy! You should call him Byakuya…"

"Byakuya?" the women whispered curiously.

"It's the name of a great noble leader…" Rukia added and moved a step away from the bench.

"Wait? Are you leaving?" the women said worried as she begun to enjoy the presence of that mysterious Kuchiki Rukia. "Couldn't you stay a little longer?"

Rukia stopped for a second without facing her.

"My husband …died… and I will grieve him for a while" she said with an empty voice. "… but don't worry, I will come back."

The women watched her leaving the alley of the playground, astonished by the fact that the cheerful appearance was hiding in fact a recent loss. Then she had suddenly realized the even though she knew that mingnonne brunette's name… during the whole conversation she haven't gave hers.

"I'm Amaya… " she yelled from behind.

'_Amaya… which means the rain of the night…Interesting women. But dangerous. She had almost killed Byakuya before he could even been born. '_ Rukia told herself and the next second she shunpo-ed.

Amaya remained shocked as she saw Rukia disappeared. In that moment she thought that she might be a true guardian angel… but then she saw the real address she had left her on the pregnancy test.

.

* * *

.

"Mariko! Mariko!" she yelled from the moment she stepped into the garden of her house. The house that now belonged to her only.

She saw the tiny servant who once used to be her friend and she watched with ruthless eyes.

"Bring me my black clothes! Be aware to be back within two minutes!" she coldly ordered.

She had to be firm…This was no time for her to afford any weaknesses. After she threw over her the black yukata she swooped like a storm in to the main room of the house. There she saw all the Elders making themselves at home. It's not as if she wasn't expecting such a scene. She had been gone for a few days under the circumstances on which the formal leader of the clan had passed away, leaving no one else so control them. Indeed there was no time for her to show her weaknesses.

"Oka-san! Oka-san!" she had heard among the unfriendly faces the voice of her daughter. Haruna immediately hugged her. "You're back! Have you found Oto-san?"

She leaned over and kissed her forehead. "Yes I have… wait for me in your room, I'll be there shortly…" she whispered, then she turned to the Elders who immediately raised from their seats and turned to her with an intrigued expression.

"How can the Lady of the house fall into contempt so much and leave these lands right after the funerals of our lord?" one of them growled.

"How can she even leave so freely when she should take care of the family matters?" another voice was heard.

"She should stay locked in house and grieve for the whole year as the tradition requires!" another one added.

"SILENCE!" Rukia yelled so strong that made all the elders freeze in fear. "Since when the Kuchiki manor had become your 5 O'clock tea spot?" BE GONE! ALL OF YOU!"

The roomed was drowned in silence. Rukia slowly approached them with a ruthless look.

"Do not mistake my position…" she hissed with an ice voice. " I am not a weak widow… nor an acquaintance adopted by your clan… nor the lady of this household! I am your former leader!… the 29th head of the Kuchiki clan… so you should all be aware of the way you are addressing me!"

The elders one by one started to bow their faces.

"When I'll return to this room I want to find it empty with you all gone to your homes!"

Then she turned to one of the servants:

"Where is my son?" she asked with the same ice voice.

"Training with Kurosaki- sama…" the servant answered quickly with a bow.

"I'll kill that man!" she hissed as she made her way out the room.

Indeed, she needed to stay strong. She needed to show no weaknesses. She needed to show that she can control them … because Byakuya was no longer holding her back…

* * *

**Thank you in advance for reading!**

**Go easy on me with the spelling / grammar mistakes. I don't have a beta for this story.**

**What do you thing... Will this lady be a good mother to the human Byakuya?**

**I'm waiting your opinions... because your opinions are carrying on this story! :)**


	4. Dear Guardian Angel

**Hi there! Another soon update! I've put all my heart into this chapter. I reaaaaly hope you will like it!**

**So go ahead... and meet the little Byakuya!**

* * *

_**.**_

_**Dear Guradian Angel…**_

_**. **_

Rukia strongly banned the door as she entered in Ichirou' room.

"Were were you at noon?"she hissed.

"At the Academy…" he replied untroubled as he was pretending to be concentrated on what seemed to be a note book.

Rukia cocked her eyebrows.

"Is that so?..." she asked with a low but menacing voice. "Because Ukitake has been visiting the Academy looking for new recruits and he asked for you but you weren't there…"

"It depends on the hour on which he came…maybe I've left before."

"You mean at noon?" she added coldly.

He immediately raised his head from the notebook with a worried expression.

"That's it!" she concluded annoyed and approached the corner of his room where a zanpakuto was leaning against the wall. "This will stay with me from now on!"

The boy got up from his seat with a scared and annoyed expression as his mother took his zanpakuto. He reached his hand to grab it but as the glare in his mother's eyes was horrific, he ended up baking off.

"I've had enough of your Rukongai escapes and hollow adventures! And now, with that bastard here to encourage you…I wonder what should I be expecting next!

"Don't call _him _a bastard!" the boy shouted.

Rukia gave him a bored glare.

"I will call him exactly what he is…and as long as he will act as irresponsible as a child… he is a _bastard!"_

" _He _is not a bastard! He is my…" the boy continued to shout as his mother's eyes widened.

"He is your… what?" Rukia cut in with a fake sugary voice. "Come on! Say it!" she raised her voice angered. "Say it out loud!… Especially when your _father_ had recently died!"

As Byakuya's been mentioned the boy bowed his face and suddenly backed off.

"You're the heir of the Kuchiki clan… try to act responsible for once!" She added and left the room holding his zanpakuto.

As she exited the room, making her way to her study, an army of servants surrounded her.

"Take this and seize it in the zanpakuto's locker at the 13th Squad." She ordered to one of the servants as she handed him her son's zanpakuto. " Byakuya saved him once. He will not be here to save him twice!" she added.

"Ruki-sama…" another servant approached her. " The council wants to know your decision on the color of the invitations for the Hanami Party."

"White." She replied then she turned to another. " Where is Ichigo?...Please try to watch him close while he's with Ichirou."

"Rukia- sama…" another servant approached her. "This came for you this morning…It's from the real world…"

Rukia stopped for a second and turned to the servant who handed her an envelope. She took it and carefully looked at it.

"Rukia-sama… The Ryoing family had arrived" another servant said.

"Tell them that I'll join them in a few moments" she answered distracted as she continued to look at the envelope. She made her way out of that flock of servants, heading to Byakuya's ex study.

"Rukia-sama….Rukia-sama… Rukia-sama" the servants were calling her from behind, but she ignored them all.

For a second she sighed tired.

"_It has been this way ever since you're gone, Byakuya… 3 months have passed since then… I wonder how you were handling it all back then"_ She whispered to herself.

.

* * *

.

The moment he heard his mother furthering away along with her servants, Ichirou started to throw in his room with everything that felt in his hand. In less than 5 minutes the whole room seemed demolished. Infuriated and exhausted at the same time he let himself lean over the torn futon.

"_I hate her!"_ he hissed.

"Who?" a voice suddenly asked.

The boy lifts his head and saw on the windowsill an orange haired man.

"Ichigo!" the boy happily exclaimed and as he got up a wide smile appeared on his face.

After the discussion he had with Rukia, Ichigo closed all his bank accounts. The next day he returned to Karakura and asked Urahara to open the gate to Soul Society. Ever since he's been close to the Kuchiki manor. Rukia was not the reason for it. He knew that she came back a few days later after he arrived in Seireitei, but even though they were so close they were avoiding themselves. After so many years of separation on which they ought to add the weight of their painful past… both of them found difficult to interact. The only reason for which he was here was…Ichirou.

"I've found some little hollows…They're good for training. What say you?" Ichigo asked cheerful. He looked again the same way he did in college, since his shinigami appearance remained young.

Ichirou, bowed his face.

"I…I can't…" he finally answered.

Ichigo looked at him confused.

"Did Rukia gave you again… Kuchiki stuff to do?" he asked slightly annoyed by that perspective.

"No!" the boy answered annoyed. "She took my zanpakuto… because I skipped the classes at the Academy."

"But you were with _me! _We were training!" Ichigo replied annoyed.

"I'm sure that's exactly why she did this! I hate her!"

Ichigo turned to the boy with wide eyes. Then a strange smile appeared on his mouth.

"No, you don't hate her…Trust, you could never hate her… because I also tried to hate her…and I couldn't…"

Ichirou looked at him with sadness. He noticed in the orange haired man a certain melancholy every time he mentioned his mother. For some reason the same melancholy took over him.

"Maybe you could talk to her and convince her to give me back my zanpakuto…" he finally said.

Ichigo looked at him incredulously.

"No… I don't think I could…" he replied.

Ichiirou made then a disappointed face. He knew why Ichigo feared so much to see her. He remembered so well the summer he spent with him and her in real world and he knew that those feelings couldn't have disappeared so easily. After a few moments of silence Ichigo suddenly said:

"Hey… you wanna to see grandpa?"

Ichirou's bad mood immediately disappeared.

"Com'on… I'm sure that old man it's eager to see you!" Ichigo added.

.

* * *

.

Rukia locked herself in Byakuya's study and ripped the white envelope. She took out the letter she found inside and opened it:

"_Dear Guardian Angel,_

_I ought to call you Kuchiki Rukia, but ever since you appeared out of nowhere and you comfort me with your words I'm thinking of you as my guardian angel. After our short meeting i had a terrible time. I don't seem to handle the separation from Shoji as well as I thought I would. During these three months I also thought of what you said about keeping the baby ( by the way you were right, I was pregnant!). As a matter a fact the baby it's the main reason for which I've decided to write to you. I've decided to keep it! Does it surprise you? Perhaps not… but for me this decision it's still a shock. Initially I wanted to get… rid of it… but then I found myself delaying to much the doctor's appointment until I understood that I didn't have the guts to do it. Last week I finally made the appointment. It wasn't for an abortion but for an ultrasounds session. I have my baby's first picture! … He might look like a sea monkey in this moment, but for me it's perfectly beautiful. I could say that I'm happy with the decision I made… except for the fact that I started to freak out…It's not happening all the time. During the day I work and I keep my mind busy, but when I get home and I'm all by myself I start to wonder how am I going to handle this. In moments like those I start to miss Shoji and my mother… I start to miss a word that could comfort me…_

_I guess… I'm a little lonely… and you understand best this feeling…of losing a beloved one._

_Amaya_

_Ps: I also sent you a picture of the little baby. Isn't he just the most beautiful unborn baby?"_

Rukia retook the envelope and found the picture. She smiled.

'Sea monkey, you say?' she told herself then she took an empty paper from a drawer putting herself at the desk.

"Rukia-sama… Rukia-sama" a voice from the hall was heard.

"Tell the Ryoings to wait!" she ordered while she took a pen…

"_Dear Amaya,_

_If there is something that it's surprising me, it's the fact that you were still considering not having the baby after we had that conversation. I believe I told you from the beginning that you are a strong women and I'm sure that you will perfectly go through this. And don't worry, you're not alone. In short time I'll be with you… I wish I could have more time to write to you, but ever since I'm back, this household it's a mess and my son had became a trouble maker teenager. Sometimes it's quite hard to handle all by myself, but I can't let myself fall apart. My husband may not be here anymore family, but my children still need me so I can't afford to be weak. You should also think about your child in order to become stronger… in order to chase away the loneliness…_

_Your Guradian Angel,_

_Rukia Kuchiki_

_PS: It is, indeed, the most beautiful unborn child."_

_._

* * *

_._

One month later another letter came:

"_Dear Guardian Angel,_

_I must confess you with surprise that you were right guessing the baby's gender! I will have a boy! I don't know if it shows through these lines but I'm so happy. You told me in your last letter that one of your children it's also a boy. I will need all the advices you can give me when it comes to be a mother!_

_Otherwise, I hope things had settled down in your household… As a matter a fact I would like to know more about it… and about your children too. Here, things had also chilled out a little. I guess that preparing to be a mother keeps me busy._

_Amaya_

_PS: the due date it's the 31__st__ of January."_

After she read the letter, Rukia approached the calendar and put a red sign the next to the date of 31th December. With eyes wide opened she noticed that the due date was also Byakuya's birthday in Seireitei. In response, Rukia wrote:

"_Dear Amaya,_

_It's not that I guessed the baby's gender. I just knew it, because guardian angels know a lot of things!_

_I'm surprised that you want to know more about my family. I don't believe it's a lot to say…In this moment I'm just struggling to gain the respect of the family members. After my husband's death I remained the head of the clan. Not being a pureblood noble and also not being a man, it's difficult to maintain the authority. It may sound strange to you but that's how noble families are running. It's all about gaining the control by making the others understand that you are their leader._

_Otherwise I'm trying to remain a good mother. With the girl, Haruna it's easy because she's like an angel, beautiful and good. She looks a lot like her father as they both share the same grey eyes, an emblem of my family. With the boy, Ichirou it's a little difficult because he won't listen to anybody and the notions of respect and rule are strangers for him. He spends a lot of time with a friend of mine… and he seems to be happy with him…so happy that he started to prefer him instead of me. I guess I could live with that if only… this friend of mine wouldn't have been so similar to my son and if he wouldn't have encouraged his irresponsible behavior. He's so annoying… this… this… Ichigo._

_Please take care of yourself and write to me as soon as you can!_

_Your Guardian Angel,_

_Rukia Kuchiki"_

A month later the answer came:

"_Dear Guardian Angel,_

_You seem to be part of a quite important family. I won't ask any further details because then the world in which you're leaving would seem to be pulled out of a… fairy tale._

_Here things had been slowly evolving. I have quite a big tummy now and the little boy started to kick. He's quite strong! There is just one thing that's worrying me… Lately I have lost my appetite for food replacing it with a hunger for all sort of fruits and liquids: water… milk… juice…even wine. The doctor says that the baby's healthy but do you thing something might be wrong?_

_Amaya_

_PS: I just wanted to add that this… Ichigo… doesn't sound like a bad person to me…after all he spends his time making your son happy."_

In response, Rukia wrote.

"_Dear Amaya,_

_Do not worry about you not having appetite. This eagerness for liquids… I also had it during my pregnancy with Haruna. Back then I used to drink milk all day … and my baby turned out to be perfectly healthy. So once again, don't worry! But if you want an advice from me, don't try to mix the fruits with the milk._

_Otherwise I was wondering. Have you given to your family the big news? How about Shoji, the child's father? Have you been keeping in touch with him? Does he know?..._

_Write me back soon,_

_PS: No, Ichigo it's not a bad person… actually he…he… he is a good friend."_

As usual, the next month the reply came:

"_Dear Guardian Angel,_

_Why does it sound to me that this Ichigo it's not only a good friend? Why does your voice sound sad in my mind every time you mention his name?_

_Otherwise my baby and I are very well. We are kind of exited because my mother will visit us next week._

_Amaya._

_PS: I've been keeping in touch with Shoji on skype but… no, I haven't told him."_

Right after she read the short letter, Rukia's eyes widened. In reply, she wrote:

"_Dear Amaya,_

_I don't really know what 'Skype' means but I know that Shoji must know the truth. A pregnancy it's not something you can hide forever. Furthermore, isn't he the one who wants to marry you when he gets back?...You said when me met that he was gone for two years only. By now, one year has almost passed…After the baby it's born, you'll see how quickly will pass the second one… and before you would know, Shoji will be back to you. Trust me and confess him! I'm sure that if he loves you, he will be happy about it._

_Your Guardian Angel,_

_Rukia Kuchiki._

_Ps: I guess my voice was sad… because after my husband, Ichigo is the second person… it hurts so much to think about….I shouldn't have said that! Could you ignore this lasts words?"_

After a pause of 2 months, the next letter arrived:

"_Dear Guardian Angel,_

_I've told him… "_

In response, Rukia simply asked:

"_And?..."_

A week later Amaya wrote to her:

"…_He said he will try to be here by the time the baby will be born…"_

After she read the short message, she looked at the calendar: 30th of January. Rukia looked thoughtfully at the garden that was beautifully covered in snow. Usually, during this period while the servants were preparing the New Year's Eve party… she was thinking of a present for her Byakuya. She was always celebrating his birthday on 30th instead of 31st of January. Both of them were retiring in their room having their own private party while on the halls the servants were making a lot of noise with the preparations. She liked being in his arms during those days of winter… He made her feel warm. The last year, during his last birthday he told her: "I so happy…"

The stomach ached her as she remembered that night. She turned and left the room.

"Haruna! Haruna!" she called.

When that mini replica of Byakuya appeared, she smiled and kissed her forehead.

"This year I won't be at the New Year's Eve Party… Please take care of your brother…" she whispered.

Haruna's face filled with sadness as she watched her mother furthering away.

.

* * *

.

In her neat and bright apartment, during the 31st of January, at 2. 28 pm, Amaya was circling nervously the living room.

'_Didn't he said that he will be here in the morning?... Why is he taking him so long?...Did he got cold feet?... If he's not going to be here, who will drive me to the hospital? Besides It's New Year's Eve … How will I find a cab_? She kept talking to herself.

Suddenly the door bell rang. She startled. She approached the door full of excitement and before she could open it, she looked once again in the mirror, fixing her hair. She took a deep breath and opened the door:

"Contratulatioooooons!" a choir suddenly sang.

Amaya backed off scared, as she saw three scary men dressed in black kimonos. Then her gazes descended and she saw in front of them a little brunette woman.

"Rukia…Kuchiki?" Amaya asked half confused, half surprised.

"Who else?" Rukia answered puzzled as she made sign to the three men dressed in kimonos to enter the apartment. Each of them entered carrying a huge amount of big boxes, shopping bags, toys, plushies, diapers, milk, food, clothes…and everything else that could have been related to newborn babies.

Amaya backed off, overtaken by the scene: in one minute her living room was filled with presents for her child. After she slowly came to her senses a wide smile appeared on her mouth and she approached Rukia, who was trying along with the others to arrange the presents.

"Rukia…I'm so happy you came!" she exclaimed and took her in her arms.

Shocked and unused with such friendly reactions Rukia stood still and replied with a tangled smile.

"Thank you for the presents! Oh my! They're so many!...And so expensive! She said as she enthusiastically looked through the bags.

"It's.. Nothing" Rukia replied. "And you shouldn't make such a fuss about me being here… I told you that I was coming haven't i? "

Amaya turned to her.

"Well I thought… you weren't serious…" she replied with a guilty look as she grabbed in her arms and enormous plushy chappy. "I love this one!"

Rukia looked around and when she decided that everything she had bought was brought inside she turned to the 3 men:

"You'll go home now! No stopping at the supermarket or at the mall! I'll have Haruna telling me if you'll do such a thing! Now go!" she ordered.

The moment they were gone Rukia turned to Amaya who was still playing with the plushies.

"So… when are you suppose to be at the hospital?"

"An hour ago?.." Amaya replied with a guilty look.

Rukia's eyes widened.

"And what are you standing there for? Get up! Let's go!" she shouted and grabbed her hand.

"No! Wait!" Amaya riposted. "Shoji hasn't arrived yet!"

"Who the hell cares about Shoji know? she scolded her as she was pulling her to the opened entrance door.

"Weren't you saying that Shoji it's important?

"You can't have your baby here!" Rukia shouted.

"But Shoji…" Amaya mumbled with a crying voice.

"Amaya?..." a third voice was heard.

Both women turned their eyes to the door. A tall man with brown hair and blue eyes was standing in the threshold, holding a heavy luggage and a big bouquet of flowers.

"Shoji!" Amaya hissed as she started to shiver.

"Shoji ?!" Rukia repeated surprised.

But then the three of them remained mute for a second as the carpet underneath them became wet.

"My water broke…" Amaya whispered with a blank expression.

"Her water just broke!" Rukia shouted half scared, half excited.

"On my God!" Shoji shouted shocked.

.

* * *

.

An hour later in the maternity, on the surgery room, 6 persons were trying to work in. Amaya was on the table. A nurse was holding her head and Shoji was holding her hand while his face was completely transfigured by fear and excitement. On the other side, two doctors here helping the delivery while Rukia was trying to slip between them.

"You're doing great!" the nurse said, but Amaya had a puppy face ready to burst in tears.

"Just try to push!" one of the doctor said annoyed as he was trying to convince her to do this for half an hour now.

"It hurts!" Amaya cried like a child.

"Just try to listen to the doctor, love" Shoji said with a trembling voice.

"What do you know? Come and push in my place if you want!"

"Just push for god's sake!" the doctor shouted.

Rukia growled annoyed and push away the doctor.

" You don't know how to do it!" she said annoyed. "You know nothing about delivery!"

The doctor's eyes widened.

"I bed your pardon? I've helped the delivering of hundreds of children!"

"Yeah, but have you actually delivered one?"

The doctor's eyes widened again.

"That's what I thought! I've delivered two…so make room!" then she turned to Amaya. "Come on take a deep breath and try to push!" she told her with a motherly voice.

"It hurts!"

"It might…But right after you get the baby out you'll forget about this pain! So you'd better make this quick so the pain will last less!

Amaya look at her distrustfully.

"Come on…take a deep breath and pu…." Rukia said.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aa!" Amaya yelled as she was pushing.

"Good! Great!" Rukia said pleased. Once again!"

"Nooo!" Amaya cried. "Nooo! Because I'll feel like I need to go the toilet!

"Now?!" Shoji asked scared.

"We'll stay here until the morning!" the doctor said bored.

"If you feel that need of going to the toilet it's actually a good thing…" Rukia answered to Amaya.

"What?!" Amaya said. "That's so gross!"

"No… it's not gross, it's just giving birth! Rukia said amused. Come on, push!

"Thaaat's soooo groooooooooooooooooooooooooo ooooooooooss! Amaya yelled as he was pushing.

"Ok, it's gross but keep pushing!" Rukia said.

"Groooooooooooooooooooooss!"

"I can see the head!" Rukia shouted. "Push!"

" Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaahhaaa!"

"Once again!" Rukia shouted.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrah hhhhhhhh!" Amaya yelled again but as she remained speechless, she took a deep breath and pressed her head on the table.

The same moment a strong crying filled the room. Holding a little wet and messy child Rukia stood in her feet.

"Look," she said turning to Amaya. "It's Byakuya…"

Shoji turned to his woman.

"Byakuya?" he asked surprised.

"It's the name of a noble leader…" Amaya answered as she looked at Rukia holding her son, Byakuya.

Rukia then turned her eyes to the tiny and nosy child, her chin trembling as if she was going to burst in tears.

"_It seems Byakuya that I've been with you since the very beginning_!" she told herself.

Then the nurse came and took the baby from Rukia's arms.

.

* * *

.

_Lately I've started to hear a voice… It's sweet and pleasant. Every time I hear that voice I can distinguish clearly "mommy". I guess that I will call the voice "Mommy". I guess I like Mommy._

_I also like the place I'm staying. It's warm…and safe… and I can get whatever I want. It's enough only to wish to have something sweet and I get it. It's enough only to think that I'm thirsty and I get something to drink. I like drinks a lot._

_I'm happy as I am… but lately I've become so big that I don't fit in this place anymore. Lately I've changed a lot. I looked at my hands and saw that fingers had grown on them… 1…2…3…4…5… I have 10 of them. Then I looked closely. There's another finger under my tommy… I wonder how can I used it._

_Anyway… it became too crowded here. I must get out!..._

_I rolled a few times trying to find a way out and then I heard Mommy screaming. There are other voices outside…Mmm…I'm curious… I must get out and meet them!_

_I must get out! I must get out! I must get ooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuut!..._

_Aaaaaaaaaaah! No! No! No! …I want back in!... I'm cold!... And the light is blinding me!_

_I wahahahant baaack! I wahahahant baaaack!_

_What?... _

_What it's this?... There's something keeping me warm. I like it!… I could get used to that! But what is it?_

_I opened my eyes and saw i it. It was very beautiful. And it was looking at me… _

_Were those eyes? Was that violet?..._

… _Is she Mommy?..._


	5. The lullaby

_**Hi there! I've been busy lately so i could't keep up with the daily update. Anyway here you have another chapter... It's not smth extraordinary, that's why i'm in a hurry to write the next one.**_

_**There might be a few ( or many) mistakes but in this moment i'm extremely tired and it would be impossible for me notice them.**_

_**Also i wanted to thank you all for the reviews. i'm trying to answer to each of them.**_

_**i know that everybody want's to see Byakuya grown up already... but patience it's a virtue, right? ( just teasing :) )**_

_**And last but not least... A special thanks for those who are following both of my stories ( the next update should be coming in a couple of days.) :) .**_

* * *

.

_**Lullaby**_

_**.**_

"_Rukia took a deep breath and approached the door. It was Byakuya's bedroom door. After another few hesitations she finally knocked._

"_Who is it?" Byakuya's grave voice was heard._

"_It's me… Rukia…" she answered with a low voice, not knowing what was she doing exactly, at this late hour. _

"_Come in…" he answered._

_Nervously, she suddenly felt the eagerness of going back to her room…but finally she pulled the door. _

_From the threshold, she saw him standing up in his feet next to his desk. He was dressed only in his night yukata._

"_It's there something wrong?" he asked as the silence persisted. _

_Still standing speechless in the threshold, she just raised her eyes toward him._

"_Did something happen to your son?" he asked._

"_No…" she finally spoke. "Ichirou it's fine…The governess had put him to sleep already."_

"_Then?" he said inquiringly._

_Rukia opened her mouth for a few times, then bowing her face, she finally spoke:_

"_I…I …I was wondering if I could sleep… here …tonight…"_

_Byakuya's eyes suddenly widened. He looked at her, wondering if she really meant those words._

"_Enter…" he answered._

_With her face still bowed she made a few steps._

"_And close the door behind you…" he added when she was already half distance from him._

_With a face red she turned and closed the door. Now, they were alone in a locked bedroom… _

_Acknowledging this fact, he looked at her for a couple of seconds still as a stone. It was his own manner to show that he was nervous._

_It was an awkward moment. _

_It was the first time._

"_I was just about to go in bed…Should I turn out the light?" he said with a white voice._

"_Sure!" she replied trying to act normal but she was visibly nervous. "I'm tired too… we should just go to bed…"_

_They both silently put themselves on the futon, with hands out of the blanket, both looking at their wedding ring._

"_Actually, I'm not sleepy…" Byakuya said after a few minutes of tensioned silence._

"_Yes?" Rukia replied trying to pretend surprised. "Me neither…"_

_Silence fell again._

"_We could talk if you want…" she finally said._

"_Yes… I suppose so…" Byakuya replied still tensed._

_But then silence filled the room again._

"_So I should understand that nothing it's new at my headquarters?" Rukia said after a while, trying to make a conversation._

"_We already spoke about this during dinner…" he answered. "So, no, there isn't…"_

"_Y-yes… I must have forgotten…"_

_But she wasn't forgetting anything. She was just desperately trying to oust this tensioned atmosphere._

"_Ichirou it's sleeping…" she said again._

"_You told me that earlier…" he replied, but then she turned to him:_

"_And I don't feel like sleeping…"_

"_You told me that a minute ago…" he answered, but this time his voice was lower as he unconsciously approached her. " I also don't want to sleep…"_

_They both looked into their eyes for a second. He wondered if he should do it…If she had finally made up her mind. On her turn, she wondered if it was not too late… but then he approached her ever more, and slightly touched her lips. As she didn't reject him, and moreover she reached her neck to approach him…he finally pressed again his lips on hers, this time, in a truly passionate kiss. She put her arms on his neck as if she was silently asking for more and he took her all in his arms…. But then he suddenly stopped for a second looking at her with a strange glare… It was as if it was hurting him too much to have her here. When she returned those painful eyes a worried look, he finally smiled and came closer to her ears:_

"_You have no idea…how much I have been waiting for you, Rukia"_

_And after that he lowered his hand trying to find the cordon of her yukata… he finally discovered with a pleasant surprised that it was already untied."_

_._

* * *

_._

Rukia suddenly opened her eyes

"Waaahaaaa! Waaaaaa! Waaaaaaaaaaa!"

The baby was crying again. She looked around dazed, realizing that she felt asleep… for 10 minutes! With an exhausted gesture she took her head in her palms trying to ignore the crying sound. Things had being going on like this for three days now. Everybody in this house was crying! Amaya was crying because the two weeks break of her boyfriend had ended and three days ago he returned to US. She couldn't blame her. She knew she was a strong women and everything was due to the post-birth depressions… The only thing Rukia feared of was that soon she will start to have her own post-birth depression, given that little Byakuya was crying non-stop and she was the only one able to take care of him..

"What it is it now?" she said from the chair on which she had felt asleep. "I've fed you… I've changed you… I've sang to you… Why won't you go to sleep?"

She sounded really irritated as she took the baby out of his cradle, attitude which surprisingly made him even more nervous.

"Ok… Ok… ok…" Rukia begun, returning to her motherly voice. "You're right, i won't shout anymore…But you still need to get some sleep… you know that, right?"

The little Byakuya looked her with wide and curious eyes as stopped crying.

"I know…." Rukia added with warm smile. "I'll sing a lullaby…You should know it, because I used to sing it all day to Haruna…_"_

Saying that, she started to walk slowly in the room as she was swing Byakuya in her arms. With her low voice she started to hum in the silence of the room: "_Koko ni ikiteru imi ga wakaru yo, Umare ochita yorokobi o shiru, Let's stay together, itsumo…"_

And slowly Byakuya's eyes closed.

.

* * *

.

_Well… she's not Mommy, but I like her as much as Mommy because she spends more time with me than her…_

_Oh no!...she had put me again in this thing that Mommy calls "cradle". I don't like the cradle… It's warmer when she holds me. As a matter a fact I don't like it at all when I'm not next to her. Now it seems that she isn't here anywhere and I'm alone. But she'll be back! I'm sure she'll be back soon… I just must wait!... No problem, i'll wait… I have patience, i'll wait… But why isn't she back already?... Why?... Come back already! …_

_Maybe if I cry she'll hear me!_

_Coooohaaahaahaaam baaahaaack! I don't like being alone! Coooome back!_

_Oh! She's back! She took out the cradle…This crying thing must have work then. I'm so happy! Oh!... But she doesn't seem happy to see me… Why does she look at me with that frown? … Why is she yelling?... She doesn't love me anymore?_

_That though scared me so much that I started to cry again._

_Oh!... She stopped yelling! And that frown disappeared. She's smiling again!... I'm so relived! For a second i almost thought that she will leave me again in the cradle._

_It feels so good when she holds me…_

_What is this? She sings?...I like her voice… It makes me feel warm and sleepy… My eyelids are slowly closing… It must be from that song she sings… Somehow I must have heard it before…but where? Mommy never sings…so then who else could have done it before? … And where?_

_._

* * *

_._

'_Good! You're finally asleep_!' Rukia thought to herself and get out the room, heading to Amaya's bedroom. There she found her crying… again.

"Now what?" Rukia asked with a bored gaze as she stood in the threshold holding Byakuya.

Amaya turned to her with a puppy face.

"Shoji… we spoke on skype…"

"So?..." Rukia added emotionless.

"He said that we will definitely get married when he'll be back…"

"And aren't this supposed to be good news?"

On that question, Amaya started to cry again.

"But what if he never gets back? What if he'll find another women and have another baby with her?" she whined.

Rukia rolled her eyes bored and annoyed at the same time.

"Yeah… whatever … Just take him!" she said and put Byakuya in her arms. "In these three day I haven't slept for more than 3 hours… So I would appreciate if both of you could be quit for at least half an hour…"

Then she put herself on the bed next to them. After a second she heard Amaya whispering next to her:

"Shhh… we must be quiet, Byakuya because Kia-Kia is sleeping now"

Rukia rolled her eyes again. Amaya had come up with this nickname as a "cute" shortcut from her original one, a week ago. It really annoyed her.

"Stop saying Kia-Kia… or the baby will end up calling me like that!" she growled.

"Oh!... Kia-Kia it's upset, Byakuya… What should we do?...We should just let her sleep… Why don't we give her a goodnight kiss?" whispered Amaya with a playful voice.

"No! No kisses!" Rukia forbidden and turned herself on the opposite side of the bed. Soon silence fell and she guessed that Amaya must have felt asleep. Even though she was the most exhausted one, she was hesitating to close her eyes… She knew she could get no rest, because lately, every time she was sleeping she was dreaming Byakuya…

'If i could just….' She whispered to herself, but before she knew she was asleep.

"_They both were woken up by the slammed door. Rukia raised her head form the pillow but before she could acknowledge what was happening the 5 years old Haruna threw herself on their futon. _

"_Good morning to you, too" Byakuya answered to the little girl with a sleepy smile and passed his hand over her hair._

"_Ota-san… Oto-san…wake up already! It's Sunday!"_

"_Well… if it's Sunday weren't you supposed to jet us sleep late?" Rukia answered half asleep._

"_But I you already sleep a lot… You and Oto-san went to bed early last night!"_

_Rukia bit her lips as she and Byakuya gave themselves a meaningful look. Indeed they had both went to bed early, but not with the intention of sleeping._

"_Oto-san! Get ready already! … Mariko prepared everything! The food it's ready… the blanket…"_

'_Ooh… the picnic…' Rukia told herself. She had totally forgot about it. After the night she just had she was surprised that she could even remember her name. _

"_Well, I'll get ready in a minute. But what about you? You haven't even changed your night clothes."_

_Haruna grinned and after she gave kiss to her father she got off the bed._

"_You'll see that I I'll be ready and less than a minute!" she said as she was running to the door._

"_Don't run inside the house!" Byakuya said from behind._

"_Just let her be…" Rukia replied and yawned loudly._

_She put herself again on the pillow with a lazy gesture._

"_We must get ready…" she said, not fully convinced by her words… but then she felt a soft breathing tickling her neck._

"_What is it, my lady?" Byakuya whispered in her ear with his grave voice. "You look tired. Did you have a rough night?"_

_Rukia smiled, then she turned to Byakuya ,putting her arms around him._

"_I could say that I had an awful night!" she replied pretending to be upset. " I had a certain someone who didn't let close an eye!"_

"_He sounds like a terrible person…" Byakuya said with a serious voice, but in a corner of his mouth a pleased smile appear._

"_Oh, he really is!" Rukia added and approach his lips ready to…_

"_Mom?"…_

_The couple broke off immediately and turned their gaze to the door, where Ichirou was standing with a frown on his 7 years old face._

"_Haruna took my ball and she's not giving it back to me!" the boy said._

_Rukia's eyes widened but before she could say something, Haruna appeared in the threshold._

"_No, I didn't!" she replied annoyed. "Tell him, mom! I just put it in the luggage we made for the picnic!"_

"_Still, you took it!" the boy shouted._

"_But it's for the picnic!" she replied, still annoyed._

_Byakuya then calmly get up from the futon and approached his dresser._

"_Rukia…" he spoke pretending to ignore the children. " I was wondering what to wear today…"_

_Entering in his game she also approached the dresser._

"_I will advise you to pick something that could be dressed quickly, since we agreed to be ready in 1 minute…" she replied._

"_Indeed, Rukia… " Byakuya added impassively. "We'll be ready in one minute…and if the children won't be ready within this time I believe we'll leave them behind and the picnic on our own."_

_Hearing those last words, the children immediately left the room, shouting on the corridors for the maids' help in order get dressed. When they remained alone, Rukia and Byakuya gave themselves a meaningful smile._

"_We should teach them to knock before entering our bedroom" she said thoughtfully._

"_Useless." Byakuya replied objectively._

_Rukia sighed._

"_Still…" he added after a few seconds. " What should I be wearing today?"_

_._

* * *

_._

Rukia opened her eyes. It was already morning.

"Look, Byakuya… Kia-Kia is awake … Let's go and tell her 'good morning'…"

She lift her head form the pillow and saw Amaya holding Buakuya. She looked totally refreshed comparing to the last three days. The peaceful sleep of last night must have brought her back to her senses.

"I'm sorry, Rukia…for my behavior" she suddenly begun.

Rukia looked at her for a second, and then yawned loudly.

"I'll blame it on the post-birth depression…so don't bother"

"Thank you " Amaya replied relived. "You know… I made breakfast…if you are hungry…"

"You did?" Rukia answered surprised.

"Yep! I 'm all good now …so I couldn't laze around anymore…" she answered. "But before you eat… there is something I want to discuss with you…"

Rukia lift her eyebeows surprised.

"Don't get me wrong!" Amaya immediately said. " I'm very thankful for what you did for me… and I am aware of the fact that I would have gone crazy without you… but , please tell me… why are doing all this so freely?"

Rukia bowed her face for a second looking at Byakuya.

"Am I not your guardian angel?" she replied.

Amaya gasped not fully convinced.

"If I'll tell you why you might not believe me… So I could invent a story, but I believe this wouldn't be fair in front of you…"

"I see…" Amaya finally said. "Then I guess we could leave things like this for the moment…"

"For the moment I believe that I'll just have breakfast…" Rukia concluded cheerfully and got up from the bed.

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* * *

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_Mommy it's very funny! She makes all kind of faces… she gets upset for a second, than the next one she starts to laugh. She's just like me!... I love her! Lately I've heard that every time when she's addressing me she uses the word " Byakuya"… so I figured out that I'm Byakuya. I also noticed that Mommy says "Kia-Kia" when she's talking about _her_… so I figure out that her name it's "Kia-Kia". _

_I know it's almost unbelievable, but I discovered all this on my own… I'm sooo smaaaaart! Mommy and Kia-Kia must be so proud of me_!

* * *

**Thank you in advance for reading...**

**The romaji lyrics that Rukia sings are from the song 'Ritsuki Okazaki- For Fruit Basket"... i just thought it's perfect for a lullaby.**

**See ya next time! Until then... write to me and tell me how would you like this story to continue! :)**


	6. We are falling apart

**Hi, new chapter's out! ... There might be some spelling mistakes... Anyway enjoy!**

* * *

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**_We are falling apart..._**

_._

Ichigo entered Ichirou's room with a jump he made through the window. He found the boy on the bed, sleeping. Trying to not make any noise, he approached the desk and put on its surface a package.

"You're back already?" a sleepy asked him from behind.

"Did I wake you?"…

"No…I mean you didn't make any noise but I sensed your reiatsu…"

"Sorry…I was just passing by to give you this…" Ichigo said and showed the package. "It's… some apple pie… I guess… Anyway, your grandma asked me to give it to you…"

"Pass my thanks to her, alright?" Ichirou said as he opened the package and had o bite.

"You could pass them in person if you want… You know you can visit her anytime, right?"

Ichirou then turned to him and he finished the piece of pie, he suddenly asked:

"Have you thought about … you know what?"

Ichigo gasped.

"So you did…" Ichirou stated.

"Look… I can't … I mean… If your mother finds out…" he tried to excuse himself.

"If she finds out!" Ichiro replied with a smirk.

"But she will! It's impossible to hide it!"

"Even if she finds out she won't be able to do anything to you since you'll take her place in the 13th Squad!"

"Ichirou….I can't just become the lieutenant of the 13th Division only to be able to give you back your zanpakuto! As a matter a fact I don't know what Rukia was thinking when she asked me to do this, because I haven't trained in years… I'm not strong enough to replace her seat"

Ichirou bowed his face with an upset look.

"Mom said you achieved bankai in 3 days…."

"That was long ago. End of story!" he concluded.

"But I neeeeeeeeeeeed my zanpakuto back!" he begged.

"NO, you don't!" a third voice was heard as the door was strongly slammed. Both men turned as Haruna appeared on the threshold glaring at them angrily. "Oka-san forbidden you to use your zanpakuto!"

"Haruna!" the boy shouted. "How dare you eavesdrop?"

"I wasn't eavesdropping… I was on my way to call you to the Elders meeting! It's just about to start…"

"I'm not coming." The boy replied promptly.

"What?!... You have to assume yourself the responsibility of...!" she begun to say.

"I believe Ichirou it's too young for attending this kind of meetings…" Ichigo suddenly intervened.

Haruna instantly gave him a furious glare:

"Since when does your opinion matters? And why are you even here?"

"Haruna!" Ichirou growled with menacing eyes which made her back off… for a second. "If it preoccupies you so much, why aren't you going to the meeting?" he added.

"It's not me the heir of the Kuchiki family that Oto-san has named" she said with a hint of envy in her voice. "But if you're not going… I will!"

"Haruna… you're even younger than your brother. The meeting with the Elders it's just…" Ichigo tried to say.

"Shut up!" she yelled as If she was about to become mad. "I don't need you to give directives in this house!"

"But he's right!" Ichirou intervened annoyed. "Neither of us should be going to that stupid reunion! The only one who ought to go it's mom… but lately she's been busy chasing after her own hallucinations… and it's possible that she will never return home! Face it, Haruna! Mother had deserted us for her own selfishness!

After those words Haruna's eyes widened and filled with anger and pain, she slapped her brother.

"How dare you talk about Oka-san like that?!" she yelled.

"Haruna, calm down!" Ichigo intervened as he tried to stop her second hit, but brutally she raised her other hand and slapped him also.

"What was that for?" Ichigo replied annoyed.

"That's because you're interfering with this family's problems… and because you're encouraging ichirou's behavior!... I hate you!... Ever since you have entered in our lives you had brought nothing but misfortune upon this house!"

" Is that so?! " began Ichigo furiously. "Well … If it wasn't for me … this family wouldn't have existed in the first place!

The silence felt between the three of them. Haruna's eyes were filled with tears and Ichirou bowed his face knowing that this time, there was nothing he could say in order to stand up for his favorite orange haired man. Ichigo suddenly regretted the angriness he had a moment ago and took a few steps back.

"Some cold and inappropriate words to be said to such a mild, little girl, Ichigo" a forth voice was heard from the threshold.

"Ukitake…" Ichigo hissed.

The next second, silently Haruna left the room.

"What are you doing here?" Ichigo asked the captain.

"Actually I was looking for Ichirou… But it seems that I chose a bad moment." Ukitake replied.

"It is, indeed, a bad moment" Ichiro answered with a low voice as he was heading to the door. "I must attend the Elder's meeting".

As Ichigo and Ukitake remained alone, Ichigo bowed his face and whispered:

"I'm sorry…"

"I'm not the person you should be apologizing to…" Ukitake said.

"I know that she never liked me… lately she begun to hate me deeply…"

"You can't blame her…" Ukitake replied. "She just fears that you'll steal Byakuya's place…"

Ichigo hissed annoyed.

"**How can I even steal something that was mine from the beginning**?…" he added.

Ukitake lift his eyebrows confused but before he could say a word, Ichigo jumped off the window.

"See you Ukitake!..."

.

* * *

.

Haruna retired in her room putting her face on the pillow so that her crying won't be heard.

"You shouldn't waste you beauty on meaningless tears…"

She lift her eyes and saw the white haired captain standing on the edge of her bed as he was gentling smiling at her. She immediately threw herself in his arms, pressing her face on his chest.

"How can he say such things about Oka-san? How can he be so irresponsible?" she asked while crying.

But Ukitake smiled while he was patting gently the girl's hair.

"It's the same as if you'd ask me…why is he such a child when he should still be one…"

Haruna grabbed strongly his clothes.

"Dry you tears, Haruna" he comforted her. "Wasn't Byakuya always saying that…"

"…Tears don't fit a Kuchiki…" she whined.

" That they don't fit such a princess" I wanted to say…" Ukitake added.

She bit her lips. Indeed, those were her father's words, spoken every time he was comforting her. Spoken, every time they got a chance to spend some time together… just the two of them. Back then he used to call her "princess"…

Now, there was no one left to comfort her pain. Now, there was no one left to stand up for her… Her father was dead… Her mother was gone… And her brother… her brother chose _him _instead of her!

"Why?..." she asked with a painful and angered voice. "Why everything that was dear to me was taken by _him_?...Why?"

Ukitake lowered his gaze confused.

"That night…Oto-san told him to stay at home but he didn't listen. Of course he didn't because he wanted to fight… he wanted to become stronger. It has always been like this ever since he met Ichigo. He always told me that he wants to surpass him… but I know that in the depths of his heart, he only wants to make him proud…"

Ukitake's eyes widened.

"Ichigo is the only person Ichirou can see…" Haruna continued. " So slowly the rest of us were banished from him heart. It begun with Oto-san , then continued me… and that's how my family started to fall apart."

Haruna clinched her first then she remained silent for a few moments.

"I remember the day Ichigo came in Serireitei." She suddenly said. " It was the summer I turned 6… Oka-san told me that he's a close friend of her who came here because his mother, who died in the real world, was found in Rukongai. It all seemed plausible and innocent but, in reality, the way Oka-san was looking at him worried me … Slowly she started to spend more and more time with this man…and she was also taking Ichirou with her. I was confused at first and I asked her many times to take me and Oto-san along, but she was always making up excuses. Then, one day, during that summer, Oka-san took Ichirou and left with Ichigo in the real world… I remember clearly that day when Oto-san and I, were left behind … For the first time, he skipped work and remained at home , sitting silently on the porch while his eyes were fixed with emptiness on the horizon.

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Flashback

"_Oto-san?" Haruna said with a low voice as she entered her father's study and found him on the porch._

"_Haruna…" he replied with a cold voice. "Haven't I told you many times before to knock before you enter a room?"_

_Haruna was worried. She had never known the ruthless Byakuya he used to be. She had never heard that way of speaking before._

"_Oto-san…" she whispered as she approached him and put her head on his lap. She waited for him to pat her head, as he always did, but for the first time he remained still and cold as in iceberg._

"_Oto-san…" she said again. "Where did Oka-san and Ichirou went?..."_

"_In a place far from here…" he replied emotionless._

"_But why?" she insisted as his tone of voice was worrying her._

"_Because that is the place where they left their hearts…" he replied._

_Haruna didn't understand his words, but somehow they filled her heart with sorrow._

"_Are they coming back?" she asked._

" _Do we need them to come back?" he replied coldly, but somehow she saw the sadness that started to take over his heart. He suddenly turned to her and she saw that coldness of him disappearing. He was again the Oto-san she knew so well. He took her in his arms and told her tight._

_For a reason that she couldn't explain, she felt that, in that moment, her father had a strong eagerness to cry…"_

End flashback.

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"For the first time I thought that my whole life was a lie…" Haruna commented. "During that summer I kept asking myself what Oka-san and my brother were doing… and every time Ichirou's face appeared in mind I was asking myself why did Oka-san took him with her, instead of me… It was a thought that was consuming me, because ever since I can remember she had preferred him… She had always treated him as her only treasure. … Even now, after all these years, I can still remember…

.

Flashback

.

"_The four of them were sitting in the garden enjoying the warm weather. Rukia had the idea of bringing paint and let the children draw while she was having a cup of tea with Byakuya. For a childish reason, Haruna insisted for a drawing contest which should have been judged by Rukia. As the children let their imagination free, Haruna tried to draw a family portrait made of chappie figurines because she knew that her mother loved them the most. Ichirou, who didn't even liked drawing, just wrote on the paper: "I want noodles for dinner". When the children handed the papers to their mother, Rukia took first Ichirou's and after she silently looked at it for a second, she begun to laugh._

"_Byakuya, come! You must see this! Ichirou's so funny!"_

_Then she turned to Ichirou._

"_You sure know how to make Oka-san laugh!... With this you had definitely won the contest! Come on let's go get your prize… A biiig cup of noodles"_

_Haruna looked as they both got up, realizing that her mother didn't even looked at her drawing._

"_Oka-san…" she called her while holding her paper._

"_Don't worry , bunny… We'll be back I a minute. I'll look at your drawing later…"_

_But for Haruna, later it meant that her mother wasn't even interested in her work. She threw the drawing while she made an upset face._

"_I believe that the ears … are very interesting…"_

_She suddenly turned and saw her father looking at her drawing with a concentrate expression._

"_It's done very well… I'm proud of you. You have inherited the Kuchiki talent in arts"_

_Haruna smiled for a second, but then her eyes continued to linger on her brother's "drawing"."_

End flashback

.

"Back then… she had always secretly preferred him." Haruna whispered.

.

Flashback

"_Haruna was running back home with tears on her face, as the other children had bullied her and rejected her as play mate. Because of her last name, she was unfairly thought to be arrogant and full of herself. She entered the gardens and as she saw her mother on her porch, she threw herself in her arms telling her all that happened. Rukia knew that this wasn't __happening for __the first time , so she tried to find her best words to comfort her… but then on the alley another crying sound was heard. Rukia immediately left behind her daughter and run toward Ichirou. She had found him with a slight scratch on his knee. He seemed perfectly fine, but Rukia freaked out. She took hi inm her arms and hurried inside the house. She passed beside her daughter of which tears weren't even dried, as if she never existed._

_Alone, Haruna just put herself on the grass… and cried by herself for a while. She waited, but her mother didn't come back…Instead:_

"_Tears don't suit my princess" a voice was heard. She raised her eyes and saw Byakuya who was leaning over her so he can grab her in his arms."_

End flashback

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"Oka-san always loved me… but every time Ichirou was near, everyone else was disappearing from her sight… and dad or i, we weren't exceptions. "After she said that, Haruna remained silent and thoughtful for a couple of minutes. Then she suddenly continued:

" That summer, 8 years ago I remained with my father, who was strongly pretending that Oka-san's absence wasn't affecting him. And then, one day, during autumn she and Ichirou came back. No matter how much I wanted to pretend that I'm angry for being left behind, in reality I was so happy that they were back. For some reason I believed that father thought the same way as i and that soon, our lives will go back to the way they were before…But of course, they didn't!… I remember the evening when all of us were finally at home. I wanted to sneak into my parent's room so I could sleep with them, but instead I heard them arguing… for the first time.

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Flash back

"_Don't think so high of yourself" Byakuya said__ with a voice that was terrifying by its coldness. __"Your absence meant for me nothing more than it should have. It opened my eyes and remembered me the reason we had this marriage in the first place…"_

_Rukia's eyes widened._

"_I wonder what am i going to hear next from you, Byakuya?… T__hat m__aybe Haruna, herself was a mistake?" she shouted._

"_No, Rukia." He replied with a calm and cold voice. "Haruna it's the only good thing that came out of this marriage."_

"_I see…" she growled with anger._

"_The only one…" he pointed again. "I t would be good for you to remember that!"_

"_Enough!" she yelled. "Byakuya ,I won't stand this behavior of yours any longer… You are not to judge my actions, nor unburden me with consequences that I don't deserve!"_

"_To judge you actions…" Byakuya hissed thoughtfully. "Let's presume that I won't judge you… and you will tell me then, how should I classify the action of a married woman who leaves for a couple of months with a man, different from her husband!"_

"_He is not just a simple man!…" she shouted._

"_Exactly my point!" Byakuya replied with an icy voice. "I'll tell you once again, Rukia. You think to high of yourself and you have indulged yourselves to step on the pride of this family when you left."_

"_So even after all these years it's all about the Kichiki pride?! I have done nothing wrong! And above all, __as a wife, __I have not deceived you "_

" _You have not deceived me?...Who can guarantee me that?..." he asked as he turned to her with a pair of ruthless grey eyes. It was a look she haven't seen in years. "Can you guarantee me that?"_

"_I…" Rukia begun full off confidence, but Byakuya turned away his face._

"_You may guarantee me that you haven't deceived me with your body and I will believe you…" he begun. "But don't try to fool both of us by telling that you haven't deceived me with your heart…"_

_Rukia bowed her face trying to find the proper words._

"_Don't force yourself, Rukia…" Byakuya added coldly, without facing her. " I believe it's time for both of us to remember the reason we had this marriage in the first place"_

_Rukia's eyes widened. Those words seemed to knock her down._

"_Very well, Nii-sama" she replied emotionless._

_His eyes widened as he heard the way she called him. He haven't heard that appellative in more than 8 years.._

"_I will ask to have prepared my old bedroom" she added._

"_Please do that…" he replied calmly, still not able to face her."_

End flashback.

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"Until that evening I didn't know that my mother was adopted in the Kuchiki family as Oto-san's sister. Even so… knowing that, was not as shocking as it was to find out the reason why they got married."

She gasped as she tried to dry her tears, than she put her head on Ukitake's lap. He didn't say anything and silently waited for her to continue the story.

"After the little escape Oka-san had with Ichigo and Ichirou in the real world … it took years for my parents to sleep again in the same room. Ever since, Oka-san haven't mentioned Ichigo but her relation with Oto-san had changed. It wasn't something to be easily noticed because they never stopped being good parents and in the public they continued to appear as the most respectable and stable couple…

.

Flash back

"_Haruna looked around with boredom as she was surrounded by old men and members of the Kuchiki family. It was the annual Hanami party that her parents were giving. Even though it was a party she wasn't enjoy herself. As a matter a fact she was waiting for the perfect moment to approach her parents and tell them that she will leave to meet her friends._

_She looked for her them and saw they were caught in a conversation with one of their distant relatives. As she came closer she started to hear the conversation:_

"…_So I was thinking that I could send the boy to the Shinigamy Academy the next year…What do you think Kuchiki-sama?" the man said, which after a closer look Haruna recognized as being Nanakuma Noru._

"_I don't believe the admission exam will be a problem. For a Kuchiki it has never been." Byakuya replied._

"_But what about your son?... Is he preparing to become a shinigami too?"_

"_This matter has not been discussed yet…" Byuakuya answered._

"_Indeed, Ichirou-san it's still young." the man said, then looked at Rukia. "You have two beautiful children… Your family it's truly blessed!"_

_Rukia smiled warmly, thanking for the compliment. She kept her smile until the man the furthered away. Then, when he totally disappeared from her sight, she turned to Byakuya and her smile suddenly disappeared._

"_I'm tired. I will retire to my room…" she said coldly._

"_It would be impropriate. The party had just begun and as the lady of the house it's your duty to receive the guests." He replied impartially._

"_Don't start to preach me… I know very well what my duties are. I have already received my guests!" she said annoyed._

"_I will advise you to lower your voice…or the guests will truly believed that this "blessed family" we're supposed to be it's just an act" he added coldly without facing her._

_Haruna who watched the entire scene from behind she stared to worry._

"_Oka-san?" she said with a low voice. "Are you and Oto-san fighting again?"_

_Rukia's eyes widened for a second then she approached the girl with her motherly smile:_

"_Were you here the whole time? No, bunny…nobody's fighting. Me and Oto-san we were …just talking"_

"_Indeed…" Byakuya added as he tried to smile._

_But Haruna lowered her face._

"_What is it bunny?" Rukia asked._

"_I don't like this party… I have some friends waiting for me, can I go please?"_

_Rukia smiled. _

"_Of course, but be back until sunset." She replied._

_The girl smiled happily but before she could go, Byakuya stopped her._

"_Haruna, this party has been given by our family and these guests are here to see us. It would be impolite for you to leave. A Kuchiki never…" _

"_Drop it, Byakuya!" Rukia interrupted him coldly. "She's just a child!"_

_Byakuya slightly cocked his eyebrows, a sign that her reaction annoyed him. Then he turned his face to the guests._

"_I believe I stated my point" he said and went ahead._

_Visibly angered Rukia got up and turned to the door._

"_I've had enough of this acting!" she hissed and left the room._

_Somehow, as she watched her mother furthering away, Haruna felt that her father forbidden her to meet her friends that day only so he can go against her mother's decision."_

End Flashback

.

"Even so… during those years the problem between my parents wasn't' the only one in the family. After he came back from the real world, Ichirou totally changed. Firstly, he began to call Oto-san "Byakuya". Then he became obsess with him becoming a shinigami…and he started to train day and night in order to become stronger. Every time I asked him why he was doing this he was answering me: "Ichigo achieved bankai in three days!" . Gradually, he started to isolate himself from us and the only person he was talking to was Oka-san…

Haruna gasped again and closed her eyes.

"After a couple of years later ,Oka-san and Oto-san got back together. I don't know what happened exactly… I just remember that one morning I went to search Oka-san in her room and I found it empty. I looked for her everywhere and since there was no place she could go that early … a crazy idea crossed my mind. "What if…?" I asked myself and approached Oto-san's bedroom. I silently opened the door and surprised I found him and Oka-san sleeping together. Oka-san was cowered in Oto-san's arms while a restful and peaceful expression lingered on their sleeping faces. It was a sight that I haven't seen in a while. The feeling of being home and safe filled my heart again so I couldn't help myself to…

.

Flashback

.

"_Rukia opened her eyes and discover her daughter next to her, on the futon._

"_Aren't you a little too old to sneak in your parent's bed?" she said with a smile on her face._

"_Look who's here…" Byakuya said as he opened his eyes._

"_Sorry…did I wake you up?"_

"_Well… it's a little late, so I believe it's good that you woke us up" he answered with a smile._

"_I'm hungry…" Rukia said with a yawn. "Do we still have time for breakfast or we'll have to shunpo directly our headquarters?"_

"_I'll go to ask the servants to prepare the food… and then we can have breakfast together!" Haruna said with a happy and childish face._

"_Then… I guess the headquarters can wait a little longer" Byakuya concluded._

_Haruna got off the futon and ran to the kitchen. On her way, before she could exit the room she heard her parents talking:_

" _See? I was right when I told you to put some clothes on you!" she said._

"_How did you know she would come here?" he asked._

"_I don't know… It was just intuition…" she replied."_

_._

End Flashback.

.

"The only one who was obviously not happy with this new situation was Ichirou. Shortly after that moment, I remember that he started a big fight in the family. He asked Oto-san to enroll him in the Shinigami Academy and he refused. Oka-san also took Oto-san's side in this matter and brutally forbid him to become a shinigami. Angered, Ichirou menaced both of them that if they won't let him become one he will leave this house and pass the entrance exam on his own. Infuriated with this blackmail, Oka-san started to yell at him, telling him some cruel words. I remember well the words he gave her in response, while his face was soaked in tears: **" **_**Why, mom?... Why are you on his side? When, you and me… we were supposed to be a team!**_" … And Oka-san replied him with a sad face: "_**No, Ichirou… the four of us… we were supposed to be a family**_." … Ever since, no one in this family could get along with him. In the end he had his way and entered the Shinigami Academy two years ago..."

Here she stopped and turned her face to Ukitake who all this time, he had listened to her silently and almost shocked.

"I'm sorry…" she finally said. " I shouldn't have said all these things…I'm sorry"

"You don't need to apologies…" he said. "Neither to be worried… this entire story you have told me will be safe with me…"

She tried to smile, than put her head on his lap again.

"I miss Oto-san" she said. " I miss him and it's all Ichirou's fault… but I can't hate him and my heart it's torn because of that! The only person I truly hate it's Ichigo! I wish he'd never been born!"

Not knowing what to say exactly, Ukitake started to pat the girl's hair, while she started to whim again.

"You know…" he finally said. "There was once a girl who was also named Haruna… and as a child she also used to stay in my lap and cry. I comforted her the same way I comfort you right now… and then one day she grew up, becaming one of the strongest and most beautiful women I had ever known … just like you will become one day…"

Haruna smiled through her tears.

"I don't believe I could ever surpass Nene-cha…the name it's everything we had in commun…" she replied.

"How can you be so sure of that?" Ukitake said with his fatherly smile and dashed away her tears.

.

* * *

.

Ichigo stood on the floor looking with empty eyes at the sealing of that little room.

"Tell me, Renji… and I truly a bad person?..."

Renji who stood next to him, doing the same thing remained silent a few moments before he could answer.

"No… you're just unlucky…"

"The girl… Haruna… she looks a lot like Byakuya" Ichigo added.

"I know…"

"And she hates me…"

"It's normal…"

Ichigo gasped.

"I think… I miss Rukia" Renji finally said.

"She's not the same person anymore…" Ichigo replied.

"I heard she's looking for Byakuya's reincarnation…"

"I just think that she had lost her mind…"

"And I think that you're just jealous…"

Both men gasped.

"Well… It's kind of funny for both of us to be in the same boat now…" Renji said after a while.

Both of them laughed sadly …because they knew: it wasn't funny at all.

.

* * *

.

Later, on the evening, Ichirou came back home and as he enter the main room and he took off his kenkeikans, throwing them on the floor. Haruna who had seen him hurried to catch the little silver jewelries.

"That's it!" he shouted. "I'm not taking this crap anymore!"

"Ichirou…" Haruna gasped worried.

"They made feel like a piece of…shit! … "What would a child know about the family matters?" …. " Why isn't your mother attending the meeting?" … "Aren't you too young to wear the kenseikans?"… Those Elders were on my back during the whole meeting! I'm not doing this the second time…"

"Calm down, brother…" she said as he approached him, but he backed off, not letting her to touch him.

"As a matter a fact, I've had enough of this house and this family… If mom chose to leave us behind why should I bother to take on her responsibilities? … I'm out of this business! I'm leaving right now!"

"What?" she hissed scared. "Where to?"

"To live with Ichigo at my grandparents!" he replied as he was heading to his room.

"Ichirou, no! Wait!" she called him, but he slammed the door in front of her. "Please don't go!... Please don't leave me alone!...Please…."

She continued to knock on his door, but no answer came… and a few minutes later, she felt his reiatsu leaving the house.

Finally she got up… and with difficulty she headed to her room. There she took out a paper and started to write…

"_**Oka-san, please come back home… we are falling apart…"**_

_**.**_

_**.**_

_**.**_

* * *

_**Well that was some sad chapter... Still i'm waiting your comments on it. **_

_**I wanted to add... If you want to know who's Nene-cha ( the first Haruna, you can find her in "A frozen Ocean of rain" starting chapter 9)...**_

_**If you are also interested on finding more about "that summer, 8 years ago", follow my profile because i'm planning to write soon a story exclusively on that summer...**_


	7. I should have never been born

_**Sorry for this long update... but i'm currently working on two fanfiction stories, plus o novel that i must finish by the end of the year... If the day would have 48 hours, then my updated would be daily...**_

_**Anyway here you have Little Haruna's story, told from Ichirou's perspective...  
**_

_**Want to know what happened to baby Byakuya and Rukia... unfortunatelly i didn't have the time to get there in this chapter. I promise you for the next one (if you of course didn't lose your interest with all these introspections)  
**_

_**Most of you were troubled my Rukia's behavior... and you think she's a bad mother and wife... I wonder if she's actually a b***... I just tried to maked her more realistic according to the situations she handeling...  
**_

_**Anyway, thank you for the reviwes and the honest opinios.  
**_

* * *

.

_**I should have never been born**_

.

Before leaving, I've heard my sister crying: "We are falling apart". Her words broke my heart and I kept thinking of them for hours. There was nothing i could say in order to comfort her, because there is nothing to comfort me either. I wish I could tell her the truth, but that would only hurt her more…

The truth… the ruthless truth…

Haruna, this family it's not falling apart, because it never existed from the beginning… and I, also, I shouldn't have been born. Without me, Rukia, Ichigo… even Byakuya would have lived happily the rest of their days…as shinigamis or as humas… as shinigami leaving their duties to become humans… or as humans giving up their lives only to fall to make love once to their beloved shinigamis. That right of happiness… I've stolen that from them…

I should have never been born…

And yet I was. I opened my eyes carrying with me the burden of a past I wasn't even aware of. The night I came into the world was an eventful one. My mother's water broke in the middle of big fight. She almost died that night… and she was alone… Ichigo told me she found her half-unconscious, whispering repeatedly only two words: "The baby" and "Ichigo". It was strange to know that Ichigo was next to her in that moment, when she was already married to Byakuya by the time she was pregnant. On the other side, Byakuya also had a rough night, when I was born. Caught between the living world and Seireitei, in the middle of battle in order to protect the pride of his family and without knowing that his wife was about to deliver, he only felt as the whole sky crushed above him when he lost his in arms, killed by his own blade, his only most precious friend. I would have never known, if Ichigo wouldn't have told me… about the days before I was born.

When Ichigo told me about them, he also added with whispering thought: " _Those days, I wish I could say they didn't exist. Sometimes I feel that all should have ended with The One Thousand Years War… but then when I look at you… and at your amber eyes… I feel that I would do things all over again the same way… And that thought give me the feeling that I finally belong somewhere_…"

And after he pronounced that "belonging somewhere" he put his index finger over my chest. A stupid childish smile appeared on my face as I felt a big burden freeing my heart. I knew exactly of what he was talking because I have also had this feeling all my life.

"_I was always pressed to chose between the living world and Soul Society… between forgetting her and never letting her go… between being a shinigami and a human… and like that I didn't know where my heart truly was…that was until you were born, because in that moment I understood that with you it's where my heart should be… Ichirou, I want to thank you for being born…"_

No one ever thanked me before for being born… I was moved. But not moved enough to believe that things wouldn't have been better if I wasn't born at all… I knew that for Ichigo, being next to me from time to time was only a consolation prize...his happiness with me was fragile and short. Sometimes I was blaming myself for having his heart entrusted with me. On the other hand I couldn't reject him either, because just like him, I know the feeling of not belonging anywhere…

The feeling of knowing that something that you can't name or see wasn't right…The feeling of belonging to a family that never existed and be raised in family that shouldn't have existed in the first place.

When I was little I couldn't notice any of this … Byakuya was more than a good father , as for my mother I always seemed to be her only reason of existence. Mom was always next to me, as if she was a part of me, as if she was my shadow. She knew when I was sad before I could lower my eyes, she knew what makes me happy and what makes angry, she could make me roll on the floor from laughing in one second and make burst into tears the next one. She knew everything about me, as If she was living inside of my mind… that's why I felt the safest when I was in her arms. The same thing I cannot say about "Dad" as I used to call Byakuya back then. He never understood me a thing about me. Even so he never did wrong to me. On the contrary: he was the one to always spoil me. He was always buying me toys before I could ask them and he had never refuse me once. If I would have asked him he would have taken me to his headquarters to watch the recruits training, even thought mom forbid it and menaced ours asses with bankai. If I would ask him he would have realest his zanpakuto only to make a hanami spectacle in the garden… If I would have asked him he would have also put a fighting show in the backyard, convincing even mom to release her zanpakuto…

.

~~Flashback~~

"_Bankai! Bankai! Bankai!" the little boy yelled cheerful and clapped his hands while he was sitting on the back porch watching his parents simulating a fight._

_Rukia suddenly turned to her son with an exasperated expression. Then she turned to her husband with a frown:_

"_I think this was quite enough…Wel have to prepare myself for the Elder's meeting…"_

"_It can't be helped, Rukia …" he stated and dropped his zanpakuto. The blade entered the ground as if it was made of water._

"…_.Ban kai… Senbonzakura Kangheoshi…"_

"_Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Bankai! GO daddy! Go daddy!" the little Ichirou yelled enthusiastically from the porch._

_Rukia rolled her eyes annoyed and turned her gaze to the porch with a hopeless expression. Her eyes did not meet her exited son, but the little shrimp next to him, Haruna, who also gasped with boredom in front of the scene._

"_Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" Ichirou shouted._

"_Rukia…" Byakuya intone apparently objective. "I believe that our son is taking his my side…"_

_Rukia suddenly turned to him with a suspicious frown._

"_Is that so, Ichirou?" she said while looking at her husband with a meaningful smile. You're not on mommy's side anymore?... I guess that means I have no other choice then… BAN KAI!" ***_

"_Wwwoooooooooooooow!" Ichirou shouted as his mother white bankai filled the garden._

_Next to him, Haruna rolled her eyes._

"_I'm bored…" she mumbled, but her brother turned to her with sparkling eyes:_

"_Tell me… tell me…tell me… on which side are you?"_

_Haruna growled annoyed: "This is stupid…"_

"_I'm on daddy's side…he's much stronger" the boy replied. "But don't tell that to mommy, ok? Go daddy! Go daddy!"_

_But then Haruna turned to her mother as an idea crossed her mind. She watched the white strands of reiatsu and yelled: "Okaaa-san… Make a biiig Mr. Cappy!"_

_Rukia's eyes widened cheerfully. This was one of her favorite tricks, making chappies forms out her white bankai reiatsu._

"_Have you heard your daughter, Byakuya?... She wants the Chappy!"_

"_Nooooo… I want to see you fighting!... I don't want that stupid chappy! Daddy, tell her!" Ichirou protested._

_Rukia turned to her son with a hurt puppy expression._

"_That won't work on me… I don't want the chappy!"_

_Then Rukia turned to her husband:_

"_Byakuya… he hates the chappy… I don't know what to do…" she mumbled devastated._

_Byakuya looked one at a time at his beautiful wife and then at his son. A slight frown appeared on his forehead and finally he said:_

"_It can't be helped… He doesn't want the chappy…You cannot force him…"_

_This 'it can't be helped' was the most characteristic and representative expression of Byakuya's relation with his children. There was nothing that he could refuse to them._

"_But I want the chappy!" Haurna shouted._

"_I want the fight!" Ichirou added._

"_Then what If… Seawood Ambassador would defeat the Chappy in a prideful fair fight?" Byakuya proposed and in the same time a giant Seawood Ambassador appeared out of his sakura blades._

"_Coooool!" Ichirou commented._

"_Okaaaa-san… whach out, Seawood Amabassador will catch Chappy!" Haruna gasped scared._

"_Don't worry, bunny! Chappy it's stronger that you think!" Rukia replied._

"_Go Chappy! Go Chappy!" Haruna started to hum._

"_Go daddy and Seawood Ambassador!" Ichirou replied._

_An amused smile appeared on the parent's lips as they heard to their children._

_._

~~End Flashback~~

Mom and Byakuya used to be a lot of fun when we were little… especially Byakuya. I never understood why the whole Seireitei used to fear his coldness. Toward me he was never cold… maybe a little abashed, but never cold. In fact he was the only person within this house who never raised his voice at me, and who never punished me, no matter how big were the troubles I was getting myself into…

I remember that once a ripped his scarf… That was the closest expression to angriness that I could get from him…

.

~~Flashback~~

"_I'm not going!..." Haruna stated with stubbornness. "Oka-san will found out! You know she doesn't miss a thing!"_

"_You will come with me…because I have no one else to play with!" Ichirou growled and dragged his sister after him in his parents' room. He knew that both of them were gone at their headquarters, so he wanted to sneak in Byakuya's closet and steal his silver scarf and play with it. After he found It, he put it like bandage around his neck and turned proudly to his sister:_

"_How do I look?"_

"_Awful." Stated Haruna in a specific Kuchiki manner. _

_Ichiriou frowned: " I look great and because I look like dad now, I'll be strong just like him, ha! Eat that up!" and after he said that he slammed the door of the closet and walked away. He could only make two steps because the scarf was caught in the closet door and he got himself almost strangled as he tried to move away. Haruna started to laugh, and the boy annoyed pulled out the scarf brutally. But the next second the children stopped as they heard the sound of a ripped material. Ichirou froze. Haruna's eyes widened:_

"_You ripped it!" she hissed. "You're dead!"_

"_We're both dead because you were with me!" he commented and Haruna started to cry. "Come on, let's put it back in the closet and hide it! Daddy doesn't wear it often so maybe he won't notice…"_

_But in that moment, a shadow from the porch covered the children. They both turned at the same time and their heart skipped a beat. Byakuya slowly approached them and when he arrived in front of the closet and saw the ripped scarf around Ichirou's neck, his face become white and expressionless:_

"_I could try to explain to you how much that scarf worth, but I believe the price of ten houses in Seireitei doesn't mean a thing to you. Of course! How would a child know the value of things?… I guess that I should to move with my family in Runkongai in a worthless house so I won't be afraid that each time I come home my son has destroyed the Kuchiki patrimony …" he said with a monotone annoyed voice._

_The children remained still as a stone, as Byakuya took the torn scarf and folded carefully._

"_Both of you, out in your rooms!" he said._

_The children didn't react._

"_Now." Byakuya added. Ichirou startled and hurried to the door, but Haruna threw herself over her father embracing his legs:_

"_Oto-san… please… Don't tell Oka-san! You know how angry she will be…"_

_Byakuya didn't turn to her, still looking at his torn, expensive attire._

"_To your room, Haruna, I said" he replied._

_Later, during that evening, they were all standing around the table having dinner. The children were very stiffed and tensed, Buakuya was impassive as usual and Rukia, enthusiastically, was telling them a story about the new 4__th__ seat officer in her Division. Suddenly a servant approached the table:_

"_My Lord, Tsujishirō Kuroemon the VIII, has send word to ask you if you wish a replacement for the silver scarf for the time he will fix the original"_

"_There is no need for that. You may go" Byakuya replied._

"_The scarf?" Rukia asked confused. "What happened to it?"_

_Both children froze. Ichirou chocked with his food and then bowed his face, almost touching his plate with his forehead. Byakuya looked at the children, then at the curious and beautiful eyes of his wife._

"_This morning…" he begun. " I was careless and I ripped it as I caught It in door…" _

_Ichirou suddenly lift his gaze shocked. Byakuya didn't look at and continued to eat with an apathetic expression._

"_That's too bad, Byakuya… and strange… you were never a careless person…" Rukia commented while looking at her place._

_Ichirou turned to his father whispered a slight: "Thank you…". A slight smile appeared on Byakuya's lips._

.

~~End Flashback~~

.

It's a strange thing to be admitted, but back then, when I was little, I really admired Byakuya. He looked like the kind of person I would have liked to become: Calm, composed, graceful, serene, and quiet … while I was hot tempered, spoiled, careless, and noisy like a storm. Even so , as a child I felt that my life was perfect and I didn't sensed any of those crucial difference between us… not even when all those Elders were making comments on the color of my eyes... '_Nothing of a true Kuchiki'_ …That is what they used to tell…and for a while I didn't understand their words.

But then my sister was born and I started to feel what it means to be different. When I saw someone fitting so perfectly in that environment, I slowly started to understand that, the house I was living was not exactly the place I truly belonged. Comparing to me, Haruna was the perfect child. What to me was supposed to be explained three times, Haruna could do from the first attempt. This wouldn't have been a crime, because being the black sheep of the family wouldn't have bothered me that much since all the attention was focused on me. What was truly intrigued me, was that Haruna didn't have make the slightest effort for being so… perfect. She had Byakuya's eyes and mom's kindness. She liked the food they were both eating… she shared the same hobbies with them… she was natively graceful and delicate and didn't liked drawing attention over her. With other words, she was the perfect combination between mom and dad. Above all she had an extraordinary connection with Byakuya that I could never understand. I could swear, they were communicating trough their eyes. They didn't even need words!

It was not as if I was jealous… The truth is that i love deeply my sister, but I couldn't help to slowly notice thatI don't fit next to those three persons who were supposed to be my family…

I still remember that stupid drawing contest while I was 6… Everybody was enthusiastic about it, except me. That was because drawing was one of the countless things I didn't have in common with them. I was so annoyed that they were making me do that…and more annoyed as I saw Haruna enjoying herself. So in the end I took the paper and simply wrote: "I want noodles for dinner!". I didn't liked noodles either, but I knew that this would annoy Byakuya since he hated commoner's food. The result was surprising. Mom found my "drawing" so amusing that she made me the winner of the contest without even checking Hauruna's chappy drawing. Quite an irony! I knew that if she had saw those chappy she would have melt and forget about my joke… Maybe Haruna was upset that day, but that was only because she was just a child incapable of seeing who the real winner was.

… My dear sister, I 've tried a while to be like Byakuya… but in the end, it's you the one who won the constest of being a true Kuchiki… So now, I find it unfair, that Byakuya chose me the heir of the clan…I don't want this… I don't deserve this…

As I walked alone on the street, I found myself in front of my grandfather's house. I stopped and I saw Ichigo approaching. I don't know why but tears started to fill my eyes and words came out of my mouth without my consent.

"Mom… will be back soon… but back home it's a mess…and Haruna it's crying… and I'm so week. I couldn't do anything for her…and I just left… I know I'm just a coward, but please let me stay here until she's back so she will put all of us together…"

Ichigo didn't say a thing… he just approached me and took me in his arms. I felt so weak…and my knees started to tremble … I just fell heavy as a stone…

"Dad…" I whispered. "Dad…"

"It's alright… you can cry, Ichirou…" he whispered.

I suddenly realized, that I haven't shed a tear ever since I saw Byakuya dying in my arms. I kept all my tears hidden so I won't remember that moment… so I won't go mad… so I won't try to kill myself in order to escape the burden of guilt. But I guess that I've reached my limits. I grabbed Ichigo's clothes and let the out the pain along with the truth I've been avoiding since that night I killed him…

"Dad… " I whispered. " Dad… I miss Byakuya …"

"I know…" Ichigo replied. "But don't worry, Rukia will bring him back…"

She'd better do so because... _**I miss him so much…**_

_**.  
**_

* * *

_**.  
**_

_**This boy it's the black sheep of the family... but i think his heart is kind. He has no fault of being so much like his father while he was raised in the Kuchiki Manor...**_

_**Thank you in advance for reading amd see you next time... hope it will be a sooner one. (but if you really want to find out more about what happened before ichirou's was born and how Rukia married Byakuya, i'm inviting you all to follow my other fanfiction :) )  
**_


	8. I'm so clever

_**So, i'm trying to make it up to you... Here's a soon update. I hope you will enjoy it!**_

_**I am also glad that you are not hating Ichirou anymore... He's a good guy. You'll see that later. Anyway, enjoy the new chapter! :)**_

* * *

_**.**_

"_**I'm sooo clever"**_

_**Or **_

_**Byakuya's discovering the world**_

_**.**_

* * *

_****__**1. The fork issue**_

_**.**_

The interphone rang. Amaya approached it with a few jumps and opened the door. Then, with a shoe on her hand and the socks in the other one she turned to the kitchen where, in the little baby chair, Byakuya was staying.

"She's here… she's here! Finally!" she leaned over the chair and kissed Byakuya. "Mommy's going to work now. Bye-Bye, my love!"

'_Uhh… Mommy's leaving again…so boooring. Wait… but if she's leaving me to with who will I be left? …And who will turn on the TV for me?! Waaait, Mommy! At least turn on the TV!'_

The same moment the entrance door opened and Rukia entered the hall carrying two big shopping bags.

'_Kia-Kia's here! Pheow! I'm relived…I was about to panic… and start to cry. Lately I've noticed that the two of them became quite sensitive when it comes to my crying… and not in a good way. _'

"They didn't have the Nesle smashed fruits, so I bought some vegetables…" Rukia said.

"_What Nesle?...Nooo… not that food again!'_

"Good… good" Amaya replied while she was putting her shoes on. "Don't forget I'm done at 6 so we you and Byakuya should be at the mall around 7, alright? I'll meet you there!"

Rukia nodded as put the bags on the kitchen table.

"I'm off!" Amaya added and closed the door. The next second Rukia turned to Byakuya with a wide smile.

"Byakuya… I brought you something form the supermarket"

Byakuya blinked and then suddenly started to clap his hands. '_Yes! Yes! Yes! Kia-Kia is the best! Love her presents!'_

"Do you want to see it?"

'_Like_…_Why else would I clap my hands?_'

"If you want the present, then you must eat first the smashed vegetables!" Rukia said.

Byakuya suddenly stopped from clapping.

"_I'm not eating that!... I want milk!_"

"Byakuya, my baby… it's simple...No vegetables, no present…"

"_Like I would need a present!"_

Rukia sight and took the food out of the bag starting to prepare it.

"I told Amaya a hundred times before… you are too big for breast feeding… You're already 8 months…"

"_I want milk"_

"You just can't be fed with milk for the rest of your life!" she added while she was smashing some boiled vegetables.

"_I want milk"_

Rukia turned to Byakuya with the food bowl and put it in front of him. The boy looked at it with an apathetic expression which made her remember the old Byakuya he used to be.

"_Milk…I said."_

"I believe this needs another type of strategy" Rukia stated and took the shopping bag. "Byakuyaaa... let's see what Rukia brought today…" and she turned to him with a cheerful expression as she was holding a plastic baby fork.

"_Wooow… what it that?"_

"Do you know how to you use this?"

"_Wait… I've something similar in Mommy's bedroom…She uses it to make her hair looks nice! Ha! I'm so smart! Kia-Kia doesn't even need to explain to me how to used it"_

Byakuya reached his hands and cheerfully grabbed the plastic fork. Then, he started to pat his hair with it. Rukia instantly started to laugh.

"Byakuya… that's not a hairbrush… that's a fork!"

"_A what?…"_

"It's like your little spoon… the one you use to eat the vegetables…"

Then Rukia took the fork and made a little demonstration of how it can be used.

"_A fork… for vegetables! How boring_!"

"Don't you want to try it?"

Byakuya looked at her emotionless.

"Are you sure?" Rukia insisted. "Mommy uses a fork to eat… Rukia uses a fork to eat… and all big boys use forks for eating … Aren't you a big boy, Byakuya?"

"_Of course I am!… I guess I could use the fork… but only to eat milk…I wonder how I can do that…"_

"Come on, Byakuya… Show me what a big boy you are…" Rukia said as she took a morsel of vegetables and approached him.

Byakuya blinked impassively_._

"_With milk I said…"_

"Just one bite…." Rukia added with puppy eyes. " Or else Rukia will be very sad…."

Hearing those words, Byakuya immediately opened his little mouth and munched the food, visibly frustrated.

"That's my boy! My big boy…" Rukia said with a childish voice. "Now let's see another bite!"

Then Byakuya suddenly took the fork from Rukia's hands and tried to feed himself, alone. Full of enthusiasm, Rukia started to clap her hands.

"_I know…I'm very clever. There's no need for you to get so worked up about it"_

* * *

_._

_**2. The step up issue**_

_._

Rukia and baby Byakuya were laying on the carpet in the living room and around them a lot of papers were spread. Rukia took one of the crayons and started to draw while Byakuya was watching her carefully.

"See… That's a chappy!" she said with a smile.

Byakuya approached and rivet his eyes upon the drawing.

'_That's… beautiful! More!'_

But then Rukia suddenly got up in her feet.

"I must check the soup…It should have been boiled by now…" she whispered talking to herself, and then she turned to Byakuya: "Rukia will be back in a moment … you stay here and draw!"

Byakuya watched her leaving with a disappointed expression.

"_Where is she gone now? I said I want more… chappy! That is their names, right? More! More! More!... How can she leave me like that? I thought we were in the middle of something important."_

Byakuya finally turned his eyes to the drawing.

"_She draws so beautifully…I wish I could be like her_"

So he took another crayon and started to scrawl next to the chappy drawing. After a few attempts and quite an effort from his part to hold properly the crayon, 'the chappy' was finally done.

"_I think it look a lot like the original…Yessss! Kia-Kia must see this!...Except that she's not back yet. I should make her come back…But how? Crying will certainly work… but a few days ago, Mommy told me that big boys don't cry and I'm a big boy. I guess I must find another solution. I really want to show her my chappy! Now that I looked at it again, I think is actually better than the original! It was expected from me… after all, I'm pretty clever… Uuuuuh! Kia-kia it's not back! If she's not coming, than I will go after her! I could crawl in all fours… but that will take me forever… What If I'll stand up?... Hmmmm… I've never tried that before… I mean, walking like Mommy or Kia-Kia"_

After a few attempts on which he fell on his butt, Byakuya finally stood up on his feet. After he found the necessary equilibrium, he took the drawing and he slowly started to walk.

" Kia?..."

He exited the living room, but she wasn't in the hall.

"Kia?"

Then he went to his bedroom… Then to Amaya's bed room… and looked under the bed:

"Kia?"

Then to the bathroom. He lifted the round top of the toilet and looked inside:

"Kia?"

Then he finally went to the kitchen and found her next to the baker:

"Kia!Kia!Kia!" Byakuya started to shout with a little and high voice.

"What is it!" Rukia replied bothered as she was paying attention to the food she was cooking, but the next second, she turned to Byakuya and froze.

"Kia?" the boy stated confused.

Rukia put a hand over her chest and one over her mouth as she was watching Byakuya stating on his feet and calling her name. Then she approached him:

"Byakuya…you walk!...and you talk!" she hissed shocked.

'_Big deal! It was easy… But that's not why I'm here…Look what I've done!'_

" 'Appy….'Appy!" the boy said again as she put the paper with the draw on her lap. Rukia took it and saw some chaotic lines next to her chappy.

"'Appy….'Appy!" the boy insisted.

"Yes… Yes… It's a chappy! Well done, Byakuya!" then she looked in his grey eyes. "Can you say 'chappy' also?

"'Appy….'Appy!"

"And Rukia?"

"Kia! Kia!"

Rukia then took the boy in her arms and squeezed it as if it was one of her plushies.

"Byakuya! I'm so proud of you! Now we must call mommy and tell her that you can walk and you can talk! Yes Byakuya! We'll call mommy and I'll let _you_ do the talking"

As she was holding Byakuya, she approached the phone, but then she suddenly stopped.

"But I think Amaya will kill me if she finds out that the first word you spoke was my name!" she turned to Byakuya. " Can you say 'mommy'?

'_Of course I can… But why would I call you 'Mommy'?'_

"Come on , try it… Mo-mmy!"

Byakuya looked at her confused.

'_You're not Mommy… You're Kia-Kia'_

"Mo-mmy!" Rukia repeated.

"Kia! Kia!Kia!"

"Ok…ok… I got it…" said Rukia with a smile and kissed the boy.

'_Good… she may not be as clever as me, but at least she finally understood'_

"Kiaaaaa!" he shouted and kissed her on the chick.

* * *

.

_**3. The originality in art issue**_

_**.**_

_The drawing thing it's giving me a hard time. Rukia, as she insisted to call her because she hates the 'Kia-Kia', is much better than me when it comes to it. That why the new goal of my existence it's to surpass her. That should be easy because …I'm clever and talented! She said that herself! Now because I must prove that I'm better I should stop copying her chappies and create something on my own. After a loooong time of thinking and exercising, I finally invented something far better than the 'chappy'. Now I must show her._

"Oh, you made another draw, Byakuya!" Rukia stated exited. "That's Seawood Ambassador, right?"

_That's impossible! How would she know its name?!_

_I guess she's smarter than I thought._

* * *

_**.**_

_**4. The birthday issue**_

_**.**_

Byakuya turned 1 year old. Amaya organized a party for that occasion, inviting her friends, mothers that she met in the playground during her week-end walks. Like every party of this kind, the mothers were standing around the table eating and having conversation regarding the babies' food, clothes, health and so on… while the children '_playing'_ on the carpet.

"They look so lovely together…" Amaya stated while watching the children. "I wonder if they are communicating with each other… Do you think they are having conversations just like us, the grownups?"

Rukia cocked her eyebrows.

"Really, Amaya… one year old children having conversations! They can't even spell their names!" she said sarcastically. "Come on, let's bring the cake!"

On the other side, which was the carpet, trapped in the babies' universe, Byakuya looked apathetically at the other children. Finally, after him mother and Rukia went to bring the cake, he decided to ignore the others and he took a paper, starting to draw. A little girl from the group approached him.

'_What is that?'_

'_Seawood Ambassador'_

'_He's weird…'_

'_He is not weird… but of course you cannot understand what drawing is.'_

'_I know how to draw….'_

'_Can you draw a chappy?'_

'_Aaaaam… I don't even know what that is...'_

'_Than you can't draw! See? The difference of level between us it's very big. I don't know if you could ever rich mine"_

'_What makes you so sure?'_

'_Well… can you eat with the fork?'_

'_No…'_

'_Can you walk more 10 steps without falling?'_

'_I reached once 8…'_

'_And you also cannot draw… as I said… I am far better than you'_

'_You know what? I don't like you!'_

'_You don't even have to… I have Rukia to play with so I don't need anyone else'_

Than the light was turned off and Amaya entered the room holding a cake with one candle in the middle, while Rukia give the lead for the "Happy Birhday" song. Byakuya was taken and put at the table in front of the cake.

"You must blow the candle, Byakuya!" Amaya said.

The boy looked confused.

"Come on Byakuya, let's do it together!" she added and before he could understand what was happening the candle was blew and the smoke entered in Byakuya's eyes. Everybody started to applaude, but the boy started to cry from his irritated eyes.

'_I don't like birthdays!'_

* * *

_**.**_

_**5. The "dad" issue**_

_**.**_

'_Today, Mommy's acting strange. She is agitated, exited…nervous. She had trouble choosing her clothes…and she put o lot of color on her face… red lips, blue eyelids… she looks nice, but she's freaking me out! At least Rukia is acting normal… I believe I will just stick around Rukia today.'_

Byakuya got off from the couch in order to look for Rukia, but then, Amaya approached him and grabbed him in her arms.

"Byakuya… do you know who's coming today?" she asked with enthusiasm. "Daddy is coming, Byakuya! Do you understand? He's finally coming home to live with us!"

'_Huh?... Someone is coming to stay here? Where would he sleep? If you want you can take him to your room … because he won't stay in mine or in Rukia's'_

"Come on! Let's find something nice to dress you!"

'_Great! She dressed me like a chappy! And Rukia also seems to be happy about it! I hate this! I look stupid_!'

Shortly, after that, the tree of them called a cab and hurried to the airport.

"I'm so nervous, Rukia! I can't wait to see him!"

"Calm down…" Rukia said apathetically and took Byakuya in her arms.

"Byakuya… aren't you exited too because daddy it's coming?"

Byakuya looked at her in the same lethargic manner. He was still upset with the clothes he was wearing. When they arrived at the airport, Amaya left her son with Rukia and hurried to the landing exists. Byakuya approached Rukia pulling her clothes, a sign that he was asking her to take him in her arms.

" Rukia… what is _daddy?"_ He suddenly asked.

Rukia remained silent for a couple of seconds wondering how she should answer that question… but then Amaya appeared along with Shoji.

"Here he is!" she said exited taking Byakuya in her arms. "Look Shoji, it's your son!"

Byakuya watched the stranger with a diffident expression. He looked like a scared puppy as he turned his eyes, hiding them in his mother's hair. When the man took him in his arms and faced him with cheerful smile, intimidated by that familiarity, he started to cry…

"What's wrong, baby?" Amaya asked troubled.

"He doesn't know me, Amaya… he never saw me before" Shoji said with a sad expression.

"Mommy… Mommy!" Byakuya cried and reached his hand to grab her.

"Byakuya… don't be scared… he's you daddy!"

Byakuya turned confused to the man.

"Daddy?" he mumbled.

The man smiled happily.

.

* * *

.

By the time the four of them arrived home, Byakuya's reticence toward "daddy" lessened and slowly he stared to be act curious around Shoji. From the hall, Rukia watched the happy reunion and decided to give them o moment of privacy. She went to the kitchen. There, she found on the table the mail that no one had the time to read it. A white envelope caught her attention as she found her name written on it.

She took it.

She opened it.

She read it.

She froze.

"Rukiaaaa!" Amaya's voice was hears as she approached the kitchen. "Starting tomorrow we're beginning the wedding preparations! You'll be my maid of honor… and I don't take no for an answer!"

But in the threshold she stopped as she found Rukia with a torn expression on her face. She approached and saw the letter she was holding. She could only distinguish once sentence:

"_Oka-san, please come back home… we are falling apart…"_

* * *

_**So, that's it for the moment.**  
_

_** Thank you in advance for reading! And until the next time R&R! Each opinion counts!**_


	9. Reunions and Weddings

_**Hi there, new chapter is out! After this one, there will be an another one concerning Byakuya's childhood and then i will write about the teenage Byakuya. As i did until now, i will try to keep myself away from the cliches ( with the risk of having less writers) .**  
_

_**andyantopia and Aii Sakuraii i just wanted to let you know that i finally pulled myself out of my lethargy and wrote this chapter because you asked me to update more. ( it's like another way of putting that reviews are really motivating me to keep on writing this story...:) )**_

_**Enjoy! Mind the english mistakes!**_

* * *

_**.**  
_

_**Reunions and Weddings**_

_**.**_

_I don't know if i ever was a good mother, but my married life was all about my children. With Byakuya I never had the time for crazy, passionate honey moons or week-ends, because even from the beginning, which was the wedding, I was pregnant. Me and Byakuya we were first parents…and then slowly we started to discover ourselves as a couple._

_Byakuya it's not around anymore, but my children still needs him. It would be selfish to say that I want Byakuya back only form me… because in this family, I know I am the only one who has the strength to carry on in his absence…but Ichirou and Haruna, they are not ready yet. Especially Ichirou, who's been assigned as the next 30__th__ Kuchiki leader. He is in the most vulnerable situation now… because he has no Kuchiki blood running in his veins. Byakuya, Ichigo and I promised to take this secret in our graves, but lately it's seems that this is no longer the case... With Ichirou being so much like his Ichigo, stubborn and hot-tempered, I will not be able to not held him back any longer from becoming a shinigami…and the moment he will become a shinigami, the whole Seireitei will recognize Ichigo's reiatsu in him and know who's son he is, in reality. This revealing won't be a problem for me if it will only bring a stain on the Kuchiki name… What truly bothers me, is that, having a son, whose father is a human it's forbidden by the laws of Soul Society and this will automatically bring the death of my child. Back then I loved Ichigo so much… that I couldn't bear the thought of not having his baby. Byakuya was the only one who offered his help, and gave the child the protection of his clan, by giving him his name… In other words, both Ichirou and I, survived until now due to Byakuya's protection. But now that he is gone…Ichirou is totally exposed. Both Gotei 13 and the Kuchicki Elders will devour him… because he's not ready to become a shinigami nor the heir of the Kuchiki clan. For him, to become the heir it will take more than 60 or even 70 years… he needs to be prepared, he needs to be ready, he needs to wish so… Me, I can't hold back the Elders and the Gotei 13 for a long time… That is why i need Byakuya back._

_I stepped into the Senkaimon gate and shunpo-ed as fast as i could to my house._

"_We are falling apart…"_

_No, my baby, you are not falling apart…I will not allow this! Do you understand that? Can you hear me, Haurna… Ichirou?_

_._

* * *

_._

"What do you think, Ukitake-san?" Haruna said as she showed him a colorful kimono. "Someone from the Shiba's sent it to me…"

They were both in Haurna's room. Lately Ukitake found himself spending a lot of time with the young lady.

"You don't have to be surprised… you're already a young lady. Soon, proposing from the noble families will knock on your door…" Ukitake replied.

"Marriage? … I won't marry anyone!"

Ukitake laughed.

"Now you sound exactly like Nene-cha…."

"Good, because she never got married…"

"Actually… she had 4 husbands…"

She frowned confused and then threw the kimono over her futon.

"You never got married, Ukitake-san…" she said with a low voice.

He smiled with a tangled expression.

"I wonder why…" she added. " And don't try to blame it on your poor health… because love doesn't pay attention to this kind of small details!"

Ukitake's eyes widened, but before he could say something Haruna's eyes widened and she turned her gaze to the west, the direction of the Senkaimon gate. She sensed it! That familiar reiatsu… She was back!

"Oka-san!" she whispered and started to run on the direction of the reiatsu.

_._

* * *

_._

"Eat it up! Eat it all up!" Ishhin shouted, while Ichigo and Ichirou glared at each other with boredom.

"I don't have to eat that… I'm not even hungry. I'm not a hollow to be hungry!" Ichirou riposted.

"Shut up! You're half human, so you must eat!" Isshin shouted.

"The only reason I must eat this, is because it's made by grandma Masaki!" Ichirou added.

But then he suddenly got up from the table. Ichigo also turned his gaze to the window.

"She's back" Ichigo stated.

"So what?" Ichirou replied, pretending to be insensitive.

"Are you not going?"

"What for?... If she wants to see me she'll know where to find me…"

After that they both remained silent.

.

* * *

.

They were both running… Haruna and Rukia… And they were both crying for each other, when they found themselves together in the Kuchiki garden.

"Oka-san … you're back! You're finally back!"

"Of course I am! Forgive me! Forgive me for being away for so long!"

And they stood there for a while…. Both lying on the grass, Haruna resting her head on Rukia's lap, while she was playing with her raven hair. Slowly the little lady fell asleep. That is the way Ukitake found the two beautiful women.

"Welcome back, Rukia" he said with his mellow voice.

Rukia smiled.

"I see that you took good care of my daughter… She grew into a nice lady. Now that I see her I can't believe I've been missing for two years…"

"Two years in the real world… you know that two years here, means nothing… you could better say two days…"

"Even so… there was enough time for them to fall apart…"

"Did you find Byakuya?" Ukitake suddenly asked.

"I did…but he's a child"

"That is normal… But are you planning to do next?"

Rukia looked at her daughter's sleeping face.

"I don't know…" she hardly replied. " I haven't got the slightest idea"

For a couple of minutes they remained silent. Then Rukia suddenly said:

"Where is Ichirou? I don't sense his presence anywhere…"

"I don't want to be the one to give you the bad news…but he left to stay with Ichigo…"

Rukia frowned angered.

"That old fart! I will kill him!" she growled trough her teeth.

Ukitake smiled tangled.

"Please, take Haruna to her room. I must pay a visit to the Kurosaki's…" Rukia added .

Ukitake suddenly blushed when she ask him to take the young women in his arms.

"Don't be like this, Ukitake…" Rukia said with a warm voice. "If there is anyone I could trust Haruna with, that would be you…"

His eyes widened.

"You know, Ukitake… that I would prefer you instead of anyone else to give Haruna to…" she added. "So please, continue to take care of her… I know she's very fond of you"

.

* * *

.

Like a storm, Rukia stepped into the Kurosaki's Serireitei residence. She entered the kitchen and before Isshin could shout: "It's a family reunion!" she kicked Ichigo in his face with a kickboxing movement.

"Rukia! Are you nuts?!" He shouted with his nose bleeding.

"You insolent and irresponsible parent!" she replied annoyed.

"That's my daughter!" Isshin shouted proudly.

"Shut up old man!" both Rukia and Ichigo shouted at the same time. Then Rukia turned to Ichigo:

"How could take this child away from his home?" she yelled as she pointed at Ichirou.

"What?! He's the one who wanted to stay here!" he replied.

Rukia turned to Ichirou with a scary glare:

"_You_ are grounded!" she snapped.

Ichirou rolled his eyes with boredom, reaction which infuriated Rukia more. She approached him and grabbed him by his left ear like he was a 7 years old child.

"Ai! Ai!Ai! Ok!Ok! I'm good!" the boy shouted.

"NO! You're not good! I left for two years and you already think that you can do whatever you want and please? Young man, you are coming home in this instant!"

Ichirou gave Ichigo a desperate look, but the orange haired man found himself powerless.

"I am sorry for the intrusion" Rukia added. "We will be leaving now…"

Both Ichigo and Isshin remained still as Rukia dragged and her son by the collar of his kimono, to the exit.

"And you Ichigo, we'll be coming with us… just to make sure, Ichirou won't have any other place to run!"

Ichirou's face was suddenly filled with a happy expression.

"Can he sleep in my room, mom?" he asked.

"No, but he can sleep on the porch of you room, If you insist" she replied.

"What?!" Ichigo snapped.

But then, when she thought that no one was paying attention to her, that tough mask disappeared from her face, being replaced with a cheerful expression.

"I missed you guys, you know that, right?"

And then, like little children, the two man grabbed Rukia's hand walking by her side. The three of them were never the type to go for the touchy, melodramatic reunions. They had they special way of expressing their joy.

.

* * *

.

Ukitake put Haruna in her bed. He stood there for a couple of seconds, watching her sleeping and when he finally got up, she felt her grabbing her hand. He startled, and as he turned he saw her eyes wide open.

"Now that Oka-san is back… it doesn't mean that you won't have any reasons to pass by, right? Promise me that you will still visit me."

.

* * *

.

Later that day, after she had lunch and catch up with what happened in the mansion while she was away … after she met with the Elders… and after she finally made peace with Ichirou and let Ichigo sleep in his room, she came to Haruna.

"Bunny… are you sleeping?"

"No…" she replied and got up from the bed.

"I want to talk to you…May i?"

"Of course" Haruna replied and moved aside to make place for her mothe, on her futon.

"Haruna… I have hound Oto-san…" Rukia said.

Haruna's eyes opened in shock.

"He's in the real world… and if you want I can take you to see him the next month …"

"Can I?" the girl said amazed.

"Of course… but his not the Oto-san you used to know. He's been reincarnated and I believe you understand what this means"

Haruna lowered her eyes.

"Still… you want to see him?" Rukia asked.

"Of course!" she replied.

"Good. We'll be going then, the next month… We've been invited at the wedding reception by his mother… and I guess that will be a good moment to introduce you and your brother to them…"

.

* * *

.

The next morning as Rukia was away at the Elders's Council. Haruna got up from bed and entered Ichirou's room without knocking:

"We're going to a wedding!" she shouted.

"Go away! I'm sleeping!" he mumbled and put his blanket on.

"Onii-san… Onii-san… wake up! We're going to Oto-san's wedding!

"What about Byakuya?" he asked as he suddenly got up.

"Oka-san found him! He's in the real world and he's getting married!"

He looked at his sister shocked.

Half an hour later he was in front of Ichigo, transfigured:

"Byakuya si alive! In the real world! And he's marrying mom again… the next month!"

"He is remarrying Rukia?!"

"What are you going to do about it?" Ichirou snapped worried.

.

* * *

.

Next month, in front of the Senkaimon, along with her children and dressed in a ceremonial kimono, Rukia turned annoyed to the her left:

"Ichigo… tell me once again… Why are you coming along?"

"Well… on the invitation was addressed to Rukia Kuchiki and the family…"

"And since when are you part of the family?"

"Well technically…"

"Uhhh! Never mind! Just try to not ruin my day, ok?..." she replied, took a step forward and then stopped again. "And don't make any scenes either!... If I try to see things in a good light, it's not such a bad thing that you are coming… after all I needed someone to carry the luggage and the presents"

Ichirou turned to Ichigo and giggled as he saw him burned with a lot of suitcases.

"Cut it, Ichirou!" Ichigo replied annoyed.

"Don't mind our "carrier", Ichirou!" Rukia replied with a malicious smile. "Now let's move on kids!"

"We're not kids anymore!" Ichirou replied annoyed. "I'm already 18 ! Haruna is 16!"

"You could be 100 years old and you'll still be my "kid"! Now move your ass or else we'll be late!"

The four of them stepped into the real world and as soon as Ichigo retook his 40 years old body, they all headed to Kyoto. They stopped in front of 10 levels building in a nice and peaceful neighborhood. They took the elevator until the 6th floor and knocked at the apartment 66.

"A lot of six-es… How subtle…" Ichigo commented, thinking of the previous division of Byakuya's.

The door opened and in the threshold beautiful tall, brunette bride appeared.

"Rukia!" she gasped happily. "You finally came!"

"Amaya, you look so beautiful!" Rukia replied.

Ichigo and Ichirou gave them a meaningful look, saying: "Wasn't Rukia the one who was getting married?"

"Byakuya will be so happy to see you! He's been asking for you every day!" Amaya added.

"I bet he did!" Rukia replied smiling. "Well , let me introduce to you, my family… this is my daughter, Haruna and my son Ichirou…"

"Oh! You're kids are so big!" Amaya commented and she approached Haruna. "Your mother told me that you resemble a lot with your father… this means, he must have been a very handsome man!"

Haruna replied with a polite smile.

"Well come in… come in! The limo it's about to come and take us to the church… I suppose that you will be riding with us! I'm sure there's plenty of space for all!"

"So you're the one who's marrying Byakuya then? Not Rukia?" Ichigo suddenly asked.

Everybody remained silent and turned to him with confused expressions. Everyone, except Rukia… who was visibly annoyed.

"Amaya, my darling… this is Ichigo, the lunatic I've been telling you about!"

"What?!" Ichigo snapped annoyed.

"Oh!... I see…" Amaya replied still confused.

" What Ichigo, wanted to say was that he will be very pleased to meet your son, Byakuya…"

Ichigo, Ichirou and Haruna widened their eyes in shock.

"Well if that's the case…come along"

They all entered the house, which was full of unfamiliar faces, relatives of Amaya and her future husband. They all retired into the small room, where in a cradle, a little child was sleeping. The moment the door was opened the child woke. Amaya approached and took him in her arms.

"Byakuya, baby… want to see who came to see you?..."

'_If it's not Rukia… than don't even try to bother me!... Oh, no! Don't tell me! It is her!"_

" 'Ukia! 'Ukia!" the child mumbled.

"See? He recognized you!" Amaya said cheerfully.

"My baby!" Rukia said almost crying from emotion, as she took the boy in her arms. "I've missed you so much!"

"_It's so good you're back. I've got so many things to tell you! I must show you my latest drawings! And Mommy gave me some new toys! We must play with them!... By the way… did you notice how nice Mommy looks today? She said she's getting married to Daddy… I don't know what that means, but what is sure is that Daddy it's not a mean person. I actually like him… He also plays with me. But don't worry, Rukia! I still prefer you!"_

"My baby! My baby!" Rukia continued to say as she was holding him.

On the other side, Ichigo, Ichirou and Haruna were watching the scene speechless. They couldn't believe that the baby in Rukia's arms was the –once- mighty Kuchiki Byakuya.

"Byakuya… do you want to see what I brought you?" Rukia said.

"_Yes! Yes! Yes! Presents! Presents!... But after that can we draw?"_

"Ichigo!" Rukia orderd coldly. "Give me the green bag!"

Like a good boy, Ichigo started to search among the suitcases and bags. Next to him, Amaya turned to the door as she heard herself being called.

"Rukia, I'll leave Byakuya with you… If you all excuse me…"

"No, problem… Go, I'll see you downstairs…at the limo" Rukia replied.

"Is this the bag?" Ichigo asked as he pointed at a shiny green bag.

"Yes! Yes!" she answered and after she took it she pulled out a plushy in the shape of Seawood Ambassador.

"_Unbelievable! It's Seawood Ambassador in flash and bones! Where did you found him?"_

The boy started to laugh as he took the toy in his arms.

"You like it?" Rukia asked with a smile.

The boy nodded. "_If I like him? I love him!"_

From behind Ichigo watched the entire scene.

"Oh! Crap!" he mumbled displeased. " He is indeed Byakuya!"

Ichirou and Haruna looked at him and then full of curiosity they approached Rukia and the baby. Haruna had a smiling face , while Ichirou was still confused.

"_Who are these people?...Rukia… who are they?"_

The little Byakuya started to pull Rukia's clothes and hid his face in her chest.

"Is he shy?" Ichirou asked intrigued.

"_What?! I'm not shy! I just don't like to meet new people!"_

"Cut it Ichirou, he is just a child!" Haruna intervened.

Then, Byakuya suddenly raised his gaze and looked at Haruna.

"_Well…the lady it's certainly beautiful…"_

"You like her, Byakuya?...She my daughter, Haruna…" Rukia said.

"Nice to meet you, Byakuya" she said with a charming voice. The little boy's eyes widened, and the grip he hold on Rukia's clothes loosened.

"_She has something… I don't know what… but I feel like I've seen her before…"_

"He likes Haruna! Ichigo was right! He really is Byakuya…" Ichirou commented.

"What is this suppose to mean?" Rukia asked intrigued.

The child turned then his gaze to Ichirou. And for a couple of seconds they looked each other into their eyes.

"_He's not smiling…"_

So he suddenly got up from Rukia's lap and approached Ichirou.

"_You shouldn't be sad… Here, take it! He will make you smile! _

And the boy took the Seawood Ambassador plushy and gave it to Ichirou.

"Oh! Thanks…I guess…" Ichirou replied with a tangled smile. " But this plushy it's still weird, you know that, right?"

Then the boy took the plushie back and kicked Ichirou with it. Haruna and Rukia started to laugh.

"Ok… you're right! I'm sorry!" Ichirou added and took the boy in his arms.

From the threshold, the only one who did not enjoyed that sweet family scene, was Ichigo. Even so, he didn't say a word.

"Boy… what smells like this?" Ichirou suddenly said.

"I think Byakuya needs to be changed" Rukia said.

"Well, take him them" Ichirou said and pass the boy in Rukia's arms. She took him and put him on the table, starting to undress him. Haruna approached him curiously watching her mother as she was taking care of the baby who once was he father. While Rukia was looking into the dressing for a clean diaper, Ichigo slowly approached the naked baby. Suddenly a distrustful expression appeared on his face.

"Is this really Byakuya?" he asked with a frown.

"It looks like" Haruna replied.

"_And this… orange haired guy? Who is he?..."_

Ichigo started to laugh.

"Well I can't believe it!"

"_He looks like a clown! And he's not even funny! I don't like him!"_

"Unbelievable! The great Kuchiki Byakuya is a child who needs his diapers changed!"

"_It's settled! I really don't like him!"_

Ichigo continued to laugh, but then he suddenly stopped as he felt something warm and sorrow over his face. The next second he realized that Byakuya was peeing…

Everybody started to laugh. Even Ichirou.

"_Yeah…I know that was really funny!"_

"Well… Ichigo, now you can say that Byakuya is literally pissing on you!" Rukia snapped laughing. " I bet he wanted to do that from a long time!"

"Ha! Ha! How funny! Where is the fucking bathroom?"

While Ichigo was heading out, Rukia heard Amaya voice calling them. Rukia dressed Byakuya quickly and Haruna took him in her arms:

"Let me hold him, please" she told to her mother.

"_Hey Haruna, have you seen what I've done to that orange clown? Wasn't I funny?"_

As they were all heading out, the encountered Amaya and Shoji on the hallway.

"There you were! Come on, the limo it's about to leave!" Shoji said , but Amaya stopped as she saw Haruna holding Byakuya. "It's unbelievable…" she whispered. "You have the same eye color!"

.

* * *

.

After the wedding ceremony on which Haruna and Rukia took care of the Byakuya's entertainment so will not start to cry out of boredom, they all headed to a nice restaurant to attend the reception. They all ate good food and drink good wines. They made thousands of photos… among which hundreds included Rukia, on Amaya's insistences. They made toasts… The close friends held sweet speeches…After a few glasses, Rukia also took the initiative of a toast… "For little Byakuya's health". Haruna spend most of her time with the little boy, while Ichirou started to chat with the guests. At some point, Rukia and Ichigo founded their son on the terrace… smoking a cigarette:

"Ichirou Kuchiki! What on earth are you doing?!" she hissed as she was about to have a heart attack.

"Ichirou! Son!" Ichigo snapped.

"What?!" the teenager replied with an innocent look. "A man over there, he told that it's cool to smoke."

"Smoking it's not healthy and it's not for your age!" Ichigo said annoyed.

"Did that man gave you the cigarette?" Rukia asked.

"No! I bought I it… Dad gave me the money." Ichirou replied.

Rukia turned to Ichigo with a menacing glare.

"What?! The boy asked me for money! How am I supposed to know how will he use them?"

"You chould have asked him on what was he going to spend them!"

" How could I ? What if he needed them for condoms?"

"For what?!" she hissed exasperated.

Ichirou took advantage of the quarrel of his parents and sneaked out. At the entrance, he found Amaya, who was also having a cigarette while she was watching with amusement the couple.

"That Ichigo guy it's right… smoking it's not for kids…" she commented.

"Uuuuh!" he growled. "I'm not a kid! I'm 18 years old!"

Amaya laughed and then turned again to the couple.

"You two look like a real family…" she stated.

Ichigo and Rukia suddenly turned to the bride:

"Who? US?! NEVER!" both snapped at the same time.

.

* * *

.

Later, in the reception hall, while Rukia was still playing the "upset" over Ichirou's smoking, Ichigo approached his son and said:

"Come on… Go and invite your mother to dance"

"She's still annoyed" the boy replied.

"She's not… trust me! Go on!"

Unconfident he approached her and with a trembling voice he said:

"Mom… will you dance?"

She turned to him surprised… but the truly surprised one was Ichirou, when he saw his mother blushing.

"Well… of course. How can I refuse my son?"

They stepped into the dance floor and as he wasn't a good dancer, Rukia ended up leading the dance.

"Mom … did you see? Haruna is dancing with the baby… " he said laughing. "I still can't believe he truly is Byakuya…"

"Imagine the shock I had when I first found out…"

Ichirou smiled.

"But does it bother you that he is a child?"

"No… I got used to it…I mean, I know that is impossible to win back the Byakuya we both used to know…"

"And are you happy this way, mom?"

"What kind of question is that, you silly boy? Of course I am!... But about you?"

"As long as I have you… and Ichigo it hanging around, I guess I can't wish for more."

Rukia looked at her son with a diffident look.

"Are sure?"

He grinned with a guilty expression.

"Of course, I'll be the happiest if you'll give me back my zanpakuto!"

"I knew it!" she replied laughing. "I don't know… if you're planning to become a good boy… then I'll think about the matter."

"Well, mom… we both know that's impossible!" he replied and they both started to laugh.

After a few more steps, Rukia noticed that Ichirou was not paying attention to the dance anymore, his eyes being glued on a beautiful young girl who was standing alone at a table.

"She looks nice…" Rukia commented.

"W-what?" she boy snapped.

"Don't try to hide it! Do not think that I haven't noticed… Come on, go…invite her to dance"

"Well I can't… I mean… do you think it's alright?"

"I said…go!" she concluded with a smile.

The boy left and Rukia remained alone on the dance floor. She watched for a couple of seconds how the girl accepted exited as her son's invitation. Then she found herself alone, among all those couples. She saw Amaya dancing with Shoji and a strange feeling of took over her…

On the opposite side of the room, Ichigo was watching her. The little elegant brunette …Even after 25 years, he still thought she was the most beautiful. But she was standing alone…and somehow she looked sad…as if all her youth and beauty were wasted because there was no one to notice her.

Suddenly the Louis Armstrong " What a wonderful world" begun to fill the room. He slowly approached the dance floor. He approached her ears and whispered:

"May I have this dance, please?"

Rukia turned to him and when she saw that warm, gentle expression on his face she couldn't say anything. He took her hand and gently pulled her close. He felt her heart beating strongly … the same way it did when he was in college. He didn't say a words, afraid to no ruin the moment and slowly he lead her on a dazzling waltz. But somehow she was holding back… and avoiding his amber eyes…He knew the reason. It was a thought that made him sad and happy at the same time.

Rukia was looking around. She saw her son dancing with that charming girl… She saw Haruna holding the little Byakuya in her arms… and she felt Ichigo's warm hand around her waist.

"Don't worry…they all look happy" he whispered.

She smiled.

"I never thought that I will ever see Byakuya, my children and you in the same place without putting a fight…"

"That's why you should enjoy this moment…"

"I am, Ichigo… you have no idea how happy it makes me. I almost feel that we are all a family…"

"We could be, Rukia… if you'd wished it so…"

She turned to him, facing for the first time his amber eyes. He smiled.

"Isn't it strange? None of us is yelling of fighting in this moment…Instead our hearts are filled with warmth and peace…"

She lowered her eyes, hiding her trembling chin.

"Rukia, do you think that I don't know the reason why you are acting so cold toward me? If I meant nothing, then you wouldn't have bothered to shout… The truth is that you are trying to push me away so you won't set free the feelings you have locked up years ago…" he whispered.

"What if you are right, Ichigo?... Would you blaming me for acting this way?..." she replied with a low voice.

"No, Rukia…No… That's far from my intentions…"

"Then what are your intentions?"

"To let you know… that I still love you…"

Her eyes widened and somehow they seemed wet.

"Ichigo…" she gasped. "It's been more than 18 years…"

"Another 18 years could pass … and I won't love you less… You're the only one who can stop the rain and the mother of my only son…"

She bit her lips with a tormented expression.

"But don't worry, Rukia… I won't cross the line. Not tonight… not any other night."

The song was about to end, so he stopped.

"As I said…I love you, Rukia… and that is why I won't cross the line. The last thing I wish for you it's to have a heart as broken as mine…"

He kissed her hand and then left. And this way, Rukia remained again alone… with aching memories filling her heart. There was a time… 18 years ago, when she loved that orange haired lunatic . She loved him, with all her being… But then, Byakuya came…and Byakuya became her husband… He took care of her son, and then she gave him a daughter….Slowly she forgot how used to feel to be embraced by Ichigo…

Yes, she had forgotten how Ichigo's touch felt… Until this night.

"And I think to myself… What a wonderful world…" Amstrong was singing… but a couple of tears felt on the little brunette cheeks. And no one knew why…

No one knew why so suddenly the world was not wonderful anymore…

.

* * *

.

"Do you want to dance Byakuya?" Haruna asked.

The boy nodded and followed her to the dance floor. He started to laugh as he was showing some dancing movements and when she leaned on her knees at his level, he suddenly took her face in his little hands and kissed her chick.

" Ha'una! Ha'una!" he said exited.

She smiled and took him in her arms.

.

* * *

.

The party was almost over. Rukia picked up her son from the corner he hid with the charming lady and begun to gave her farewells to everyone. Haruna said good-bye to little Byakuya who started to cry when he saw her and Rukia preparing to leave.

"You have a wonderful, family Rukia…" Amya said.

"Thank you…" she replied.

"Now that my Shoji is here, too… soon Byakuya will be sent to the kindergarten and I won't ask you sacrifice your family time to be here… But at least promise me that we will keep on touch!"

Rukia nodded. Then, Haruna turned to both of them.

"I'd say that Oka-san could continue coming to babysit the little Byakuya."

Rukia's eyes widened.

"Oka-san, you're not a lieutenant anymore, right?... Then you have the week free. You could spend it here at Amaya-san's and the week-end you could come back home"

"Is that possible?" Amaya said cheerfully.

"If Oka-san agrees, for my brother in I, there won't be any problem…"

"Bunny, are you sure?" Rukia asked.

Haurna nodded with a smile. Then Ichirou suddenly appeared:

"Come on! Are you ready? Dad, had parked near the crossroad! He said that a police officer could come any time now!"

The three women watched Ichirou troubled, noticing the way he called Ichigo. Silently, Haruna was the first who left. Rukia bowed her face.

"Rukia…" Amaya finally said. " Ichigo it's a good man… I'm sure he deserves a chance…"

Rukia's eyes widened.

"I…i…" she tried to answer but then she saw the little Byakuya slowly falling asleep in his mother's arms. "I can't do that…Not now…"

"I see…" Amaya concluded. "I'll see you on Monday, then?"

"Right… on Monday!" she replied and she approached Byakuya, kissing him on the forehead: " Good-bye, Byakuya…"

"_Bye-Bye, Rukia… when you come back next time, please bring Haruna along. She is funny and beautiful, just like you… I love you both…very… much…Oh….i'm sooooo…. Sleepy….Rukia…"_

* * *

_** Long chapter, huh?**_

_**Anyway, i'll try to write a faster update... which i will start it tonight... that means that it's possible ( i don't promise anything) to be done until tomorrow.**_

_**Until then... write and review! It's really important for me that you guys are here and you are interested on this story...**_


	10. Our last day together

**It seems that i succeeded in finishing this chapter last night. :)**

**This is the last chapter relating Byakuya's childhood and also the end of the first part of this story.**

**I hope you enjoy this last chapter... because i've really tried to make it a little more sensitive than the others.**

* * *

_**.**_

_**First day of school, our last day together**_

_**.**_

_Ever since Haruna had the idea of splitting my time between my the Kuchiki manor and the apartament in Kyoto, my life has evolved peacefully and calm. I still have problems with the Elders when it comes to acknowledge me as the 29__th__ head of the clan and myself I believe that Baykuya would have been better than me, but at least I'm relieved that my family is doing well. Ichirou had his zanpakuto back, but as he missed four years of training, he still is In the Shinigami Academy and has o lot to catch up with. Ichigo is still leaving with us, but ever since Amaya's wedding he hasn't mentioned anything about our past together. I believe it's better this way. Haruna had become a beautiful lady. She didn't want to become a shinigami, but she spends a lot of time in my office. I know what her reason is for that, or more precisely… who is the reason … Ukitake come and visit us now and then and, but lately he became a little tensed around me. He believes I suspect that he is the one taking out Haruna on her week-ends. It's not a case of suspicion. It's a case of certainty. Haruna still finds me her confessor and tells me everything. I can't deny. I'm happy for them… I just wish Ukitake would have the courage and ask her hand in marriage. Of course I wouldn't marry her before she's 50… but I think that an engagement won't do any wrong. All in all, both of my children are happy and as a consequence I am happy too…_

_On the other side, back in Kyoto. Amaya and Shoji are one of the happiest and cheerful couple I have ever seen. The same thing I can't say about Byakuya. This year he had turned 7, and he is a spoiled, hot-tempered, full of moods child. I can't say that I love him less because of that… He is what he is and I just love him. A thing I must say that I've noticed about him: he is extremely intelligent and has an affinity for respecting the rules. These two aspects make think of him as the old Byakuya I used to be married with. Sometime it's nice to think that my Byakuya it's still alive… but on the other hand it's strange fact too, because Byakuya it's still a child, after all…_

_Anyway, since we are 7 now, we enrolled ourselves in school. It's 6.30 in the morning. Everybody's in the house is up, fresh and agitated over Byakuya's first day at school. Amaya was in the kitchen preparing the bento lunch, Shoji who took off from work for this event was verifying the battery of the filming camera, and I was with Byakuya, helping him to get dressed._

.

* * *

.

"He will record every moment, won't he?" Byakuya asked with a monotone voice.

"Aaam… I guess so. Why? Is it bothering you?" Rukia replied.

"Yes! I don't like being filmed." He said.

"You say this right now.. but later, after years, you'll find it nice to look at you and see how you were back then…"

"Whatever…." he concluded while Rukia was fixing his uniform.

"So are you ready, Byakuya?"

He shrugged his shoulders. She gasped.

"What is this? Let's see a little enthusiasm!"

Byakuya gasped and exited the room.

"Moooooooooooomy!" he yelled from hallway. "I'm hungry!"

Rukia also left the room and followed him. On the hallway, Shoji stopped her:

"Rukia, tell me honestly… Do you know how to use these things?" he asked while pointing at the handy camera.

"No." she replied instantly.

"Then what am I going to do? I'm not good at taking shots… I have a friend who works as an editing photographer, but he's not free this morning."

"Actually… Byakuya doesn't want to be filmed at all…" Rukia tried to say.

"What?!" both Amaya and Shoji shouted scared at the same time.

"Impossible! That's nonsense!" Shoji added. "First day of school it's one of the most important day of a man's life! It must be recorded… along with the first day of highschool…then graduation… then college…then college graduation…then marriage …then"

"Ok…ok… I got the idea!" Rukia stopped him with a polite smile.

From the kitchen table Byakuya rolled his eyes with boredom.

"On, my! Look at the time! We'll be late!" Amaya suddenly said. " Come on Byakuya, put your shoes on!"

"I haven't finished my sandwich!" he said untroubled.

"Well… take it with you and finish it in the car!" Amaya added.

"It's not healthy to eat while walking. A healthy meal must be eaten while sitting properly at the table! He replied calmly.

"Byakuya!" Amaya shouted exasperated. "You'll be late for school if we don't leave now!"

5 minutes later all of them, were in the car. Byakuya tied his safety bell and then Rukia's. Shoji put the key in the contact and headed to the main street.

"Mommy, you haven't put your safety bell" Byakuya noticed.

Amaya rolled her eyes.

"Yes, Byakuya, you are right…"

"Should I take in on Miyago Street or drive straight until the crossroad?" Shoji asked referring to the route.

"Myago it's better… the boulevard must be stocked at this hour" Amaya replied.

"Mommy, you still haven't put your safety bell." Byakuya insisted.

"Uuuuh!" she gasped annoyed and finally put the belt. " I don't know from what side is the taking this thing he has for the rules!" she commented as she turned to Rukia. "I mean both Shoji and I, we were the black sheep of the family when we were young. Really, Rukia! Sometimes he looks more like a character from that noble family of yours… the Kuchiki's!"

Rukia smiled politely and gave Byakuya a meaningful look.

"Byakuya, baby…" then Amaya said. " Don't forget in the art class to show the teacher your drawings… the one with the mountain landscape and the other one with river, ok?"

"Those are boring!" Byakuya snapped. "If I'll show the teacher something. I'll show her the Seawood Ambassador!"

"Byakuya… I'm not saying that Seawood Ambassador it's not ok… but the landscapes are better" Shoji intervened.

Byakuya turned his eyes to the window annoyed, while his parents started to discuss about his extraordinary talent in drawing. Then Rukia slowly leaned over him.

"I also think Seawood Ambassador is better…" she whispered.

The boy tried to hide his smile, but he didn't succeed. Finally he turned to Rukia:

"Apparently we are the only ones who thinks this way…"

When they finally arrived at the school gate, Shioji immediately turned on the camera. The first shot he got, was an annoyed little Byakuya who mumbled: " I told you not to film me… Film the building if you want." And then he looked around: "Mommy… Mommy … Where is Rukia?" The camera moved on Amaya who was happily waving her hand, expressing her excitement. After that, there was a shot with all the children in the school yard… There were children with happy and crying faces, lousy and shy, beautiful and ugly, boys and girls… and among them a boy's voice, repeating annoyed the same words:

"Where is Rukia? She will miss the ceremony! Where is she?"

But Rukia remained behind as she didn't want to burst into that beautiful family portrait. She waited until the bell rang, and everybody went to their classes, Rukia stepped into her shinigami form, and taking advantage of the fact no one could see her, she sneaked in Byakuya's classroom. She found him sitting in the second seat on the middle row. She remained next to the window and watched him for a while. She wasn't being subjective… but Byakuya was the most beautiful child in the room. Furthermore, he was actually the only one in the class who already knew to read and write. Even the teacher was impressed. Somehow she felt proud. She jumped from the windowsill and approached his seat. She knew the boy couldn't see her so there was no problem. She just kept staying there watching the serious and grave expression he had while he was listening to the teacher. Then, she suddenly saw him writing something on the back of his notebook. She approached and read it:

"_What… Are…You… Doing…Here…?"_

Her eyes widened and suddenly took a few steps back with her heart beating out of her chest. The boy knew he wasn't allowed to speak or make scenes during the class, so he remained calm and composed in front of Rukia's reaction. Instead, he wrote again at the back of his note book:

"_Of course I can see you. I am not blind! What are you doing here?"_

"I came to see if you are doing well on your fist day of school…" Rukia finally said. " But it seems that I don't have any reason to be worried …So I'll leave then! Keep up the good work! 'Later!" and after she said that, she jumped off the window.

Byakuya turned his gaze and saw her disappearing into the sky.

Later, that day, when they were both alone in the apartment he approached her and asked:

"Rukia… are you an angel?"

She turned to him hardly surprised and smiled:

"Yes, I am an angel… But not the kind of angel you think I am…"

"Can you fly?" he asked.

"Yes I can…" she replied.

"Have you seen heaven?"

"Yes I have…"

"Did you live there before you came here?"

"Yes I did… and I still do…"

"Then you are exactly the angel I though you were… But why are you here instead of being in heaven?"

"Because I want to be with you, Byakuya…"

"But don't you have a family there in heaven?"

"Yes,I have…"

"And shouldn't you be with your family?"

" You are also part of my family, Byakuya …"

"How am I a part of your family?"

"You can say that I knew you and you saved me long before you were born here…"

"This means that I was also an angel once?"

"You still are, Byakuya" she replied gently.

The boy looked around with a thoughtful expression:

"If we are family, then it means that you will never leave me…" he concluded.

"Indeed, Byakuya… I will never leaver live you" she confirmed.

Then the boy suddenly raised his face and pierced her with his grey eyes.

"Rukia, I love you! Don't forget! You promised that we'll be together forever!"

She leaned over him and took him in her arms.

"I love you, too, Byakuya! Don't worry… we'll always be together"

.

* * *

.

But "together, forever" was not a fact to begin with.

After that little conversation we had , the only question Byakuya had ever put, regarding me being "an angel" was: "Why do the angels dress in black?" I answered him: "For practical reasons". After that he never asked anything on this matter again. Even so, I continued to go to his classroom and watch over him while he continued to write me messages on the back of his notebook. It was our little secret.

Shortly, Byakuya became the best in his class. He was way above his colleagues. I don't know if the envy or his antisocial behavior was the reason why after a semester of school he still didn't have any friends. The girls were curious about his beautiful looks and most of them were secretly liking him, but genuinely, Byakuya had no one close. Every time I tried to bring this up in a discussion when we were alone, he was always giving me the same answer: "Rukia, you're my friend… and you promised me that we'll always be together. Then why do I need to make friends out of those stupid colleges from school?"

I was flattered that Byakuya considered me his best friend, but on the other side, this attitude, slowly started to worry me.

And then, Christmas came… and soon after that I had to learn to accept that "together, forever" was not something I could decide on my own.

…So it was the Christmas Eve and the presents under the tree were all prepared back home. I was supposed to spend the eve with them so I could attend to Byakuya's Christmas play at school and then leave for Seireitei the next day. After the play, Shoji had booked a table at a restaurant so we could all celebrate Byakuya's performance. It was a perfect evening. After the dessert, we all decided that I was time to go home and open the presents, so we left the restaurant. But then as we were all heading to the apartment while singing a Christmas Carol, my phone started to ring. Then I realized that it wasn't my phone the one ringing, because I didn't have any… It was the hollow detector! I found an excuse like "I forgot my wallet at the restaurant, I must go back, don't wait for me" and turned around. Byakuya started to follow me. I told him to go back. He didn't want to listen. I remember he wanted to tell me something. He said it was important, but I couldn't pay attention to what he was saying since I was trying to locate the hollows. The only words from him that I remember from that moment were:

"When you come back from heaven please bring me…something that I used to own when I was an angel too."

But then I heard a loud women scream. And it was not a scream of fear… but of pain.

"Amaya!" I shouted prepared to run but then I heard a strong plumb and I saw Byakuya thrown into the wall of the gang we finding ourselves. Before I could scream, before I could react I saw the child falling unconscious into the snow of the alley. And then I finally sensed the hollow's reiatsu. He was near and he was the one who stroke, but I couldn't locate it since he was the chameleon type. I tried to put a hado spell on him, but he had already disappeared. I immediately started look frenetically into my purse for the Soul Candy so I can pass into my shinigami form, then I heard the second painful scream.

"Shoji!"

I took Byakuya in my arms and hurried to the place I left the couple. And then my soul felt like being torn apart when I saw Amaya and Shoji lying in bath of blood, while their souls were eaten by what seemed to be a chameleon arancar. The moment he noticed my presence he left the corpses and took a step toward me:

"I've been watching you for a while, shinigami… You are always around that boy and I can never come close to him"

I understood that the final target was not me, nor Amaya or Shoji, but Byakuya who had indeed a strong spiritual pressure.

"You will die before you could wish to lay a finger on the boy!" I growled.

The arrancar started to laugh. I took the soul candy, drew my zanpakuto and yelled "BAN KAI!"… But then, before I could strike… the three sakura blades from Byakuya's Senbonzankura, that I've kept in a necklace ever since his funeral started to glow…and from them suddenly a rain of pink petals exploded and destroyed the arrancar.

I remained still and stoned watching the scene…

Then the pink blades, the shikai I knew so well, flew above me, in front of the little unconscious boy. They came all together and slowly they started to create a shape.

My heart stopped.

_Byakuya… _

Kuchiki Byakuya was in front of me. Made out of his shikai, but he was in front of me… All my Bankai vanished and I felt like I couldn't stand on my feet. I stared at Byakuya… He looked like a draw, made out of phosphorescent pink light… but he was nonetheless the Byakuya I used to know… that I used to love: Tall, with his long hair flowing over his shoulders… wearing his always the same captain haiori…

I recognized his reiatsu and the familiar feeling that used to feel me while he was next to me…

_Byakuya_…

It's been 7 years since I haven't seen him and suddenly i wondered myself how did I survived without him all this time.

_Byakuya_…

There were so many things I wanted to say…to shout…to cry.

"_I've missed you!"_

"_It hurts so much without you!"_

"_Don't leave me again!"_

"_I love you!..."_

"_I love you so much!"_

But I was speechless…

"_Rukia…"_ he whispered.

My eyes were instantly filled with tears. I was pitiful…but I couldn't stop myself. That velvet, deep, cold and mesmerizing voice, I recognized it.

Byakuya…

"_Rukia…_" he said again. "_Why are you crying?"_

I was speechless. This projection, made of sakura blades was so real. He stood there like a lifeless marble statue and still… he was the closest thing to Byakuya that I've had the past 7 years.

"_Wasn't i the one always telling Haruna that tears don't fit a Kuchiki princess?"_ he spoke.

My eyes widened.

"_So you shouldn't cry, Rukia. I can't stand to see you like this_…"

I tried to dash away my tears but new ones kept flowing.

"_I don't want to have you grieving over me. I died wishing only happiness for you…"_

I looked into his phosphorescent eyes. What a beautiful phantom, I thought… If only he could haunt me every night.

"You were my happiness…" I whispered.

"_But now you have turned me into your reason for pain and loneliness."_ He said.

"There is also hope…" I added while looking at the little unconscious boy behind Byakuya.

"_This "hope" is only another way to condemn yourself. This child it's not me… he doesn't have my memories nor my feelings for you…"_

" Your feelings…My feelings…Where are they? Where is my heart? I want it back! Give it back to me, Byakuya!" I cried.

"_Then let me go, Rukia_…"

My eyes widened.

"I can't… don't ask me this!

"_Let me go…"_ he whispered and took a step forward.

"You know I can't do it!" I cried.

"_Let me go…"_ and he was approaching me.

"I can't… It will hurt too much!"

He was so close. I could almost touch him.

"_Indeed Rukia, It will hurt you… and even if I'm dead it will also hurt me… but after the pain will fade away, you'll be free"_

Slowly he leaned over me and I also started to glow from his pink light.

"_Free of pain…free of loneliness…free of my memory…"_

I looked into his eyes. I didn't know if I really wanted that…

"…_Free of my love…"_ he added.

I didn't want that, neither did he. He tried to hide it… that sadness that filled his beautiful face. We both must have asked ourselves in that moment: "What hurts more? To never let go or to forget?"

I looked again into his eyes. I just wanted a moment of happiness. I didn't care how much it will hurt after it will fade away. And then he suddenly leaned over me and… kissed me.

He kissed me…

I haven't been kissed in 7 years… I haven't love or have any other man during this time… So I yearned for this kiss as much I yearned for air or water. That's why I enjoyed it more than any other one.

His cold and dead lips…yet warm and nervous. He was so close, yet so far away. It pains me his touch as much as it was causing me pleasure. My whole heart was being torn apart on his lips but I didn't want him to leave me. It was hurting me, but I could live like that for the rest of my life. I preferred that, instead of being left alone again in the darkness of the night.

Now, I finally understand how much I missed you, Byakuya. So, please… don't leave me again!

"_I love you, Rukia"_ I heard him whispered.

So I strongly pressed my lips upon his and fearing that he might vanish, I reached my hands to embrace him. I saw him looking in to my eyes for a second and then, when my arms were around him, his body started to disintegrate… as if It was made of smoke.

There was again dark. I was alone. I was heartless…

I saw on my left the corpses of Amaya and Shoji and on my right their unconscious son. His name was coincidently "Byakuya" …but it has nothing to do with the man who used to be my husband. I finnaly understood that.

Tears kept falling on my cheeks, but my heart was empty.

_I let him go…_

_I did_…

So this child will also be free of my pain and my shadows. He will have the right to live his life the way he wants if he will survive this night.

I looked around. People started to gather. Scared expressions. Yelling. Phone calls to the emergency.

I suddenly remembered the boy's words: "_When you come back from heaven please bring me…something that I used to own when I was an angel too_."

I took the necklace with the sakura blades and put it on his in little fist. He slowly opened his eyes. People gathered around, helping him to get up… He seemed to be half unconscious, but he clinched his fists while he kept starring at my "black angel clothes".

"Keep it… it's something that belonged to you when you were an angel… " I whispered. "Good-bye, my baby…"

I reached my hand to erase his memories but then a lot of people interfered, along with paramedics and police. I don't know how much of me he will forget… or if he will survive this night. Like his parents… he was bleeding to death…

I shunpo-ed back home…

Surprisingly I couldn't find my way.

Where was my home?... In Rukongai? In Karakura? In Tokyo, in the little apartment I lived with Ichigo while I was pregnant with Ichirou? …

In the Kuchiki manor?...

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* * *

.

Everybody was in the main room of the Kuchiki manor, opening presents, when suddenly they saw Rukia appearing in the threshold.

"Mom?" Ichirou said. "Weren't you supposed to come tomorrow?"

"I wanted to be with you, so I came back earlier" Rukia replied with a smile.

"I'm happy!" Haruna exclaimed. " We were just about to opened the presents! I'm glad you made it time!"

Rukia smiled again and sat next to them.

Ichigo looked at the intrigued. He knew that smile very well. It was a fake one…

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* * *

.

Later, that night Ichigo came to the main room and found Rukia there, sitting on dark. So he was right. Something was wrong, indeed. He approached and took her in his arms. Then he realized she had cried… a lot.

"He asked me to let him go… and I did…" she said with a white voice.

His eyes widened. He knew exactly what she was talking about.

"Ichigo… you love me don't you?"

"I do…" he replied gently.

"Then you'll let me cry, right? You'll let me cry…"

After she said that she hid her face on his clothes.

"He said it will hurt… but I didn't think it will hurt that much…" she said through her tears.

He took her face into his hands with a worried expression, but instantly she back off putting her trembling fingers over her lips.

"Don't! Please don't try to kiss me! I still have his touch on my lips! It's the last thing I have left from him… Please don't take that away from me!"

She started to cry again, collapsing on the floor. He caught her before she could fall. He was really worried about her.

"I think you should stop going to the real world to that family…" he said.

"That family is dead…" she replied.

His eyes widened, but he knew he couldn't ask anything.

"Rukia, you should stay home… retake you seat as a lieutenant…rebuilt your life…"

She didn't answer.

"I will also go back to Tokyo… so that nothing will trouble your peace anymore…"

Again, she didn't react.

He kissed her forehead and slowly left the room.

And she remained alone, facing the cold floor. She promised herself that starting tomorrow she won't cry anymore ... because she will shed all her tears during this night.

"_I let you go…but without you…_

_Byakuya…_

_Byakuya…_

_Byakuya…_

_I have nothing .__.."_

* * *

_**This it where Byakuya's chidhood and Rukia's grieving are ending in this fanfic, along with the stories of their children. See you next time in order to meet the teenage Byakuya.**_

**_Until then, read and review! Let me know what you think!_**


	11. 10 years later

_**My dear reader... as i promised, the story goes on.**_

_**I see that the last chapter made you sad. I hope this new part will put in a better mood. No more grieving... This is a story about Byakuya's human adolescence and about how Rukia learns to feel and act as a young girl again.**_

_**Enjoy! **_

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_**.**_

_**Part 2**_

_**.**_

_**Prologue**_

_**10 years after i let you go…**_

_**.**_

43 years ago I stepped into the human world and fell in love with a teenager who except from the orange hair he looked exactly like my ex-lieutenant. 9 years later I was becoming the mother of his child. But that was long ago… so long that if my son wouldn't have inherited the eyes and the behavior of that teenager, I would have forgotten all about him by now…

Sometimes I tell this to myself only to detain myself from remembering those times.

Once I was a married woman. That also happened a longtime ago. So long, that I forgot the feeling of sharing the bed with someone or the one of wearing a wedding ring.

Sometimes I tell this to myself only to detain myself from remembering those feelings.

In reality I didn't forget a thing. I just learned to live with the loss. I don't know if this made me stronger or it just turned me into a cold, colorless person. Sometimes I find myself thinking of the girl I used to be and the woman I turned up to be in the end… I also think a lot about the wasted time I wasn't aware of .

34 years has passed since Ichigo and I spit up so I could marry Byakuya. 17 years passed since my husband died. 10 years since stopped chasing his reincarnation and I haven't went to the real world …

Today, I must admit that the last 10 years, have been the ones I wasted the most… I try to pick up memories from them and I end up with nothing important. It's strange… my life was always about something extraordinary that was about to happen. Not anymore…

After I came back from the real world I decide to cut all the ties I had with it. I don't know what happened with little Byakuya. If he survived or not that night. If he had been adopted of grew up in an orphanage. If he had been happy or lost himself on the way.

It may sound cruel, but this is the way things should be. Humans and shinigamis don't belong in the same world and this is a fact I was supposed to understand ever since I met Ichigo.

Shortly after I returned home, I retook all my responsibilities as the 29th leader of the Kuchiki clan. I also retook the seat of the lieutenant in the 13th Division on Ukitake's and Ichigo's insistences. Suddenly I became so busy that I barely had time to spend with my children… so even if I wanted I couldn't find the moment to think about what I left into the human world or what I used to have when Byakuya was alive.

Ichigo, as he promised, he left Soul Society, soon after I returned. I heard that he never got married or have any other children. But nothing can be sure because, ever since he left, we haven't talk. We both thought it's for the best. Instead, Ichirou asked me to let him keep in touch with him. I promised to let him visit the human world whenever he feels like under the condition of giving up his "shinigami dream". After a few discussions and attempts to convince me to let him have both, he finally accepted to have his zanpakuto locked forever. 4 years ago, he also decided to move definitively with Ichigo. They lived for a while in Tokyo, but last year he wrote to me, that they both established in Karakura. He writes me from time to time, narrating his daily life there and somehow he seems to be happy. In every letter that I write him back I always add a "PS" with the question: "Is Ichigo starting to o bald and look like an ugly old men?". I never receive and answer to that question. That makes me think that Ichigo also reads my letters. Somehow I want to think that he smiles when he does that.

So, for the last four years in this enormous manor only Haruna and I were left. But this also changed yesterday, after her engagement party, when she decided to move with her fiancé. A few months ago, Ukitake finally found the courage and came to confess a fact that I was aware of for ages: he was involved in romantic relation with my daughter. He also felt the need of pointing repeatedly that their relation "have only a sentimental nature and that they had never…" . Here he stopped as his face turned red. I told him that there was no need to act like this and that for my concern, he and Haruna are both adults and I could care less on what they do in their privacy. I also felt the need of pointing repeatedly that he and Haruna should do whatever their hearts tell them to do. Then he finally avowed that he intends to marry her. "Not at this moment, of course. But when she will be ready" he added. In reply, I invited him to ask her if she is ready. The conclusion of this story was the engagement party the Kuchiki family held yesterday.

Now, I can finally say that I remain by myself in this palace. I can't say that I complain. Lately, since both of my children took their lives on their own hands, I found myself rediscovering the relation I used to have with Renji. We are both lonely sometimes so we are keeping each other's company as we used to, back in Rukongai, when we were children. The only difference is that, now, none of us is a street rat anymore. I am a noble and he is the Captain of the 6th Division. Yes, he replaced Byakuya in Gotei 13. It wasn't something that he wished. He really hoped that he could surpass him one day in strength, but never thought of replacing him after his death. He initially tried to refuse the promotion, but surprisingly all the captains, unanimously, wanted him in charge with the 6th Division. Somehow I've got the feeling, that Byakuya himself would have wished the same…

With Renji being around I can say that it's easier to face the loneliness. Sometimes I even forget about it. For this I am grateful to him. I never got the change to tell him, but I'm sure he knows it. After the engagement party when I saw Haruna leaving with Ukitake and Ichirou going back to the human's world the depression took over me. But Renji was next to and cheered me up. He opened a bottle of sake and simply said: "Look on the bright side. Your job as mother ended so you have more time for yourself! Oh, fuck it! It's just the two of us left now, so let's enjoy ourselves! Just have a fucking drink, Rukia! You are allowed to get drunk tonight!"

The following day, which was today, both of us were too dizzy and hangover to perform our duties. So we decided to have a few glasses of milk and move our headquarters in my bedroom, the room I used to own before getting married. It was already noon when we were both lazing on soft pillows on the floor, looking around at all the spread documents from our headquarters. In the end, what initially supposed to be work, turned up to be a gossip session:

"Since the secret love of Ukitake Taicho was no longer a secret, we can say that the suddenly engagement party did not surprised any of us. What remains a curiosity though is the way Ukitake Taicho will continue to address to his lieutenant, since he will soon become her son-in-law. You should try an imagination exercise and picture our captain wandering on the halls of his headquarters while asking for Rukia Kuchiki: "Mom, could you please take care of the new recruits?". Amusing, indeed, but not impossible" Renji was reading out loud an article from the SWA magazine.

I started to laugh. Those girls knew how to point out the absurd of the situation. I'm sure that the article was written by Matsumoto and Nanao.

"Wait…I have more!" Renji added. "On the other hand, Haruna Kuchiki's engagement it's not the only one who is rumored to take place in the Kuchiki family. It's a well known fact that Renji Abarai, the captain of the 6th division and also the childhood friend of the 13th lieutenant, has been hanging around the Kuchiki manor a lot lately… Hmmm… I would say that I hear some wedding bells ringing!" Then Renji suddenly turned to me with a smirk. " So what say you, Rukia?"

I rolled my eyes with boredom.

"Renji, don't tell me that you are trying to propose me… again!"

"Why not? I will never get tired of that! And who knows? Maybe finally you will accept!"

But we both knew that it was just a joke. The dreams we had in Rukongai as children vanished long ago. Since that time I fell in love twice and I decided that my life had enough romance in it.

"Renji… better than reading the cancan press … you should better start to put your papers in order."

He threw away the magazine and while he started to eat a sandwich, he took a document from the floor:

"This seems interesting…" he said. "It appeasers that in the United States they have found another substitute shinigami…"

"How come?"

"She is a high school girl and she took the powers of the representative shinigami by mistake, while she was trying to defend herself from a hollow. It seems that the case have been discussed by the Central 46 and since the girl had accepted to give up her human life in order to become a full shinigami, they won't execute her. Furthermore a shinigami it's been requested to take care of her and prepare her to release her own zanpakuto."

Renji suddenly frowned:

"Why don't you go, Rukia?"

"Huh?" I replied confused.

"Go and train this girl!"

"No!" I replied instantly. "Why would i? This is not a mission for an lieutenant"

"Well don't take it as missions… take it as a vacation! You've been apathetically the last few years, Rukia! A little adventure won't do to you any wrong…" he added and handed me the paper.

I took it not fully convinced.

"I'm not apathetic, Renji! I've just become old…"

"Old my ass! You look like a highschool student!" he snapped. " Trust me, you need to get away from this place for a while! Or else the loneliness and depression will catch up with you…"

"I'm not lonely…I have you…"

"Right… but if you'll hang more around me, you'll start to drink so often and so much that you'll forget the reason you begun to drink in the first place… and you'll end up an alcoholic."

"I'm wondering Renji If you are picturing a future me or your actual self…" I said.

"Sarcastic as usual!" Renji replied with an annoyed smirk.

But then my eyes descend on the document. A trip to the United Stated. Hmmm… Maybe Renji was right…

.

* * *

.

Mean while… on the other side of the world a teenage boy suddenly wake up from his sleep and looked around at his huge and luxuriously room…

"_I've had that dream again…I was a child. My mother was still alive and she was always hurrying to leave for work. But I was never left alone… There were this other women who took care of me. She was small. She had a deep voice and long dark hair. These are the only the only feature I can distinguish about her. The rest it's always blurred…_

_Somehow, in my dreams I try to reach her. I keep running after her while holding a necklace on my hand, but she is always furthering away. I try to call her can't bring myself to pronounce her name. _

_Her name…_

_Her name…_

_Her name!…_

_I can't seem to remember it!_

_And then I wake up…_

_This dream. I always have it whenever I'm stressed or I eat a lot during dinner. This morning it was none of these cases…"_

There was a knock on the door and a valet appeared:

"Cherry… the breakfast it prepared."

"I'm coming…" he replied and got off the bed with heavy, tired gestures. For a second he looked through the window and wondered himself if something will happened today that will change his life. He hoped so…

.

* * *

_**Not more of an action... but it's an introduction, right?**_

_**Waiting for your feedback!**_


	12. Highschool debut

**_To be honest, i'm not so sure about this chapter... it just didn't came out the way i expected to be... UUUUUUUh! It really annoys me!_  
**

* * *

**.**

**Highschool girl**

**.**

One week later, Rukia was standing on branch of a tree in front of an opened widow which led into a girl's room. She had a bored and tired expression on her face as she kept repeating herself: _"I'm too old for this. I'm too old for this! I'm too fucking old for this!"_

Suddenly the door opened and a girl steeped into the room. She had dark hair with blue strains and she was dressed in some weird and indecent cloths, in Rukia's opinion.

"Teenagers!" she hissed with boredom.

When her children were on that age, she could barely wait for them to grow up. Today she didn't felt as she had the energy of going through all that again. Still she jumped from the tree branch over the windowsill. The teenage girl startled for a second then her eyes slowly widened with excitement.

"Shinigami!" the girl hissed.

Rukia didn't answered. She took out a paper from a kimono.

"Jennifer Kunt?" she asked while eyes were fixed on the paper.

"In person" the girl answered with a wide smile.

"You have brown hair in the picture I receive…" Rukia stated while reading the paper.

"Well I dyed it last week…" she replied.

Rukia cocked her eyebrows:

"Aren't you a little too young for this?"

The girl looked at her confused. Without any additional questions, Rukia handed the paper:

"I need you to sign this."

"What is this?"

"Your agreement regarding me, being becoming your tutor. Since you are still 17 and a minor, I cannot turn you into a shinigami yet. You still have 5 months until you turn 18 and during this time you'll be stuck with me. This means that you'll live with me, you'll go to school with me, eat with me, train with me… and when you'll turn 18, I'll perform kenso on you and take it to Seireitei where you'll be enrolled in the Shinigami Academy. Simple! Now, sign." Rukia said with o monotone voice as she lately she became a feminine version of the old Kuchiki Byakuya.

The girl looked at her confused.

"I'll be training with you, shinigami?" she asked.

"Shinigami? You may call me Kuchiki Rukia…or Kuchiki fuku-taicho." Rukia replied apathetically.

Suddenly the girl's eyes widened.

"Shit!" she hissed. "No fucking way!"

Rukia raised both of her eyebrows.

"Are you really a Kuchiki? I've heard that you guys are like… the noble asses of that place!" the girl added.

"For your knowledge … I am actually the 29th leader of the Kuchiki clan" Rukia said emotionless.

"Wooow! Cool!" the girl hissed. "But why would such an important person like you accept such a minor mission?"

Rukia didn't answer.

"Sign the papers…" she finally said.

The girl took then a biro. And with a slightly annoyed expression, she signed the agreement. The women in front of her were beautiful and young, but she was acting as if she was 1000 years old. Boring!

"Good. Now, given that tomorrow we'll both have classes, tell me what I need to know about the highschool you are attending…" Rukia

.

.

The next morning, Rukia woke up early and prepared for highschool. She was not cheerful about it, but since she had accepted the mission she couldn't back off. She took a shower. She put the uniform on. Eat breakfast … She turned then to Jennifer's room and found her asleep.

"Wake up. You'll be late!"

"Leave me alone! I'm sleeping!" the girl growled from under the blanked.

"Class will start soon. Wake up!"

"I don't fucking care about it… I'm sleeping. I'll go when the second class starts. Just leave me alone!"

Useless. That is what Rukia thought. In the end she wasn't paid to be the nanny of that girl. If she didn't want to attend highschool it's her own problem. So, finally, Rukia went on her own. On her way to highschool, she started to wonder how many years have passed since she hasn't put a foothold in that kind of environment.

40 years…

She gasped and she wondered how much teenagers have changed since Ichigo. She expected to be different… but when she stepped in the courtyard she had more than a shock.

First question that passed through her mind was: "Where is the highschool?"

The second was: "Did I get the wrong address? I ended up in the middle of a party!"

Then, when above the gate she saw the emblem of the school she almost had a heart attack. The place was full of teenagers. That was a certainty. But why were all them driving expensive cars? Why was the music playing louder than in a club? Why didn't anyone, except her, wear a uniform? Why did the girls have their hair died and why were they walking on heels of 5 inches? The whole scene looked like an Mtv Music Awards show she once saw on tv. This was not high school. It was madness!

She took a few steps forward and saw on her right a bunch of kids gathered in circle. She approached with a horrified expression. Street dance! She saw in the middle a boy and girl trying to improvise choreography. The girl looked like a Barbie doll, except that she was wearing too much make-up. The boy was tall and thin, his black long hair tied in a pony tail. He was wearing a white undershirt, some extra-large jeans and had some crazy movement in him.

Rukia watched the couple for a couple of seconds not sure that what they were doing was dancing. Then the song ended and everybody started to yell, to hiss, to shout and applaud. The boy gave to the crowned a self pleased glare but then his eyes met the displeased expression on Rukia's face. They looked in each other's eyes for a second and she noticed he had grey eyes. Than with the same disgust expression Rukia turned around and left the crowd. The boy lifts his gaze trying to find her, but she was already gone.

"Who was that?" he asked the Barbie girl.

"That who, Cherry?"

"That nerd girl who just walked away…"

"How the fuck should I know? I didn't even see her!"

The boy gave her a bored look and then made his way to the crowd.

"Hey, Cherry! Where are you going?"

But he didn't even bother to answer.

.

* * *

.

It was a nightmare. She entered the classroom, and the first thing she saw were a boy and a girl making out on the teacher's chair. She made her way to her desk trying to avoid eye contact so she won't suffer any other shocks… Still she saw on her right a girl who was painting her nails and on her left a boy who was painting his desk with colored spray. Madness!

There were a few attempts to bully Rukia due to her nerdish appearance, but she knocked them out instantly. When the class started she actually tried to pay attention to the teacher, but she was immediately distracted by all the teenagers who instead of writing the lesson on their tablets or iPads, they were playing games and chatting on Facebook.

When the pause came. She took a deep breath, decided to quit this entire highschool thing. She got up from the desk but then Jennifer Kunt appeared in the threshold. She looked cheerful and fresh. She said 'hi' to her friends as she saw Rukia, but her mouth remained half opened.

"You're joking, right?" she stated.

Rukia frowned confused.

"Tell me that you're joking and that you actually didn't come to school dressed like that!"

"What's wrong with my clothes? It's the school uniform!"

Jennifer's friends started to laugh.

"You know her?" one of her friends asked with a disgusted look.

Jennifer was prepared to deny any connection with the shinigami, when Rukia said:

"Actually we are best friends!" and she gave her a malicious smile.

Jennifer rolled her eyes annoyed, secretly wanted to kick that arrogant shinigami. But then Rukia's expression became exasperated when in the classroom entered the boy who danced before in the courtyard.

"Great! Elvis has joined the band!" she said sarcastically.

Jennifer turned and when she saw the boy she put a hand over Rukia's mouth.

"Are nuts? He's Cherry! How can you say something this about him!"

Rukia pulled back.

"He's dancing like a monkey set on fire! I've seen him in the court yard!"

The boy stopped for a second before taking his seat and looked in Rukia's direction. His face was emotionless.

"Oh! Hi, Cherry! How are you?" Jennifer suddenly said with a charming voice.

He didn't answer. He just took a sit on his chair.

"What the fuck it's wrong with her?" Jennifer's friend asked pointing at Rukia with a slight annoyed expression.

Rukia's eyes widened.

"She's new!" Jennifer answered with a forced grin.

" I can fucking see that… but where did she come from? The fucking 19th century? Geeez…" she commented displeased.

"Britain! She came from Britain!" Jennifer replied.

"You brats!" Rukia suddenly intervened rising from her desk. "Could stop using the F word at every 5 seconds?!"

Jennifer and her friend looked at each other confused.

"How old is she?" the girl asked.

"I think she's like 1000 years old…" Jennifer replied ."Please, excuse me for a second!"

Then Jennyfer grabbed Rukia's wrist and dragged her to the bathroom. When the two of them remained alone Jennifer approached with a menacing glare.

"You know what? I think this is enough! I just can't let you walk around, embarrassing yourself and me at the same time! You said I still have five months left so I want to live them to the full! And if you want to attend school with me… and moreover, act like my best friend then you'll have adapt to the new conditions!

Rukia cocked her eyebrows.

"You'll have to dress, to talk, to walk … TO ACT like any other high school girl around here!"

"Good…" Rukia stated impassively. "If you are done I will return to the classroom…"

Jennifer frowned.

"I don't think I made myself clear! Miss Kuchiki Rukia… Here is the world of the leaving and rules are made by human not by shinigamis!"

Rukia's eyes widened surprised. It's been a while since someone had the courage to raise the voice at her.

"I don't know what it's your idea about the human world but I have to be honest with you and say that you're acting and you're talk like my grandma!"

"What?!" Rukia shouted annoyed.

Jennifer smiled.

"Honestly if you want to play the highschool student you need to make some changes…or else you'll get yourself in troubles and people will find out that you're not from here"

Rukia put her hand over her chin.

"Changes?"

"Yep, my darling!"

"Starting with…?"

"Starting with clothes…and hair!"

Rukia looked at her worried.

.

* * *

.

A few days later in the classroom, during pause, Cherry got up from his seat and approach one of Jennifer's friends:

"What happened to Jennifer?"

"Cherry!" the girl startled exited. "Hi, how are you?"

"So… what happened to Jennifer and the new girl?" the reaped himself. "They both haven't show up for a week"

The girl shrugged her shoulders. Then the boy rolled his eyes with boredom and returned to his seat.

"I can give you her number if you want… And mine too!" the girl shouted from behind.

.

* * *

.

A week later in front of the Highschool, an expensive red car parked. The driver came out and opened the door. The loud music instantly started to fill the courtyard. The attention of the passersby and the students was already caught.

From inside Jennifer turned to Rukia:

"I didn't knew you had the money to buy this car…and the driver. This is crazy!"

"The car was your idea…" Rukia replied emotionless. "Good for the image", weren't those your words?"

Jennifer grinned… and then she suddenly sight.

"Rukia..l can't believe it! You look hotter than me!... Anyway, let's go!"

Jennifer descended first.

"Rukia, don't forget! You must look confident… Make them understand that you rule the world… That should not be hard for you, Miss 29th Kuchiki Leader" she whispered before leaving.

Then the music became louder and a few seconds later, helped by the driver, Rukia came out of the car.

Slowly, one by one all the students started to turn their gaze to her.

There was a small girl coming out of a Mercedes Benz, walking on platforms of 7 inches. She was dressed up as if she was taken out from one of Rihana's music videos; but somehow she did not had the air of not cheap whore but of a total diva. Every inch of her body seemed to scream: "I'm the only girl in the world. I'm the only one in command". She stopped on the sidewalk as she saw with the back of her eyes some teenagers putting out their phones and taking pictures of her. She turned to them and after she took off her sunglasses she gave them a playful smile. Then, she left the boys broken hearted and passed the gate of the high school with everyone starring at her.

She entered the building. She looked around. Yes, she was finally fitting in. Moreover, she was standing out.

"Where have you been all my life?" a boy whispered passing next to her.

She started to laugh.

"You have no idea…" she replied.

A couple of other boys turned their gaze. One of them started to hiss.

"Oh, boy…if I were you I wouldn't do that!" she replied with an arrogant smile. "Because only a dog would reply to that hiss"

The boy immediately backed off and the others started to laugh. She turned to some girls who were next to her:

"And you girls, should also never make a move on that…"

The girl looked at her wide eyes, but then another boy approached her. Rukia turned to him with a cocked eyebrow.

"I see that you play tough…" the boy said.

"How perceptive… I wonder if you can keep up with me…" she replied bored.

"Well, try me…" he added with a playful smile.

"Hmmm…" she stated thoughtfully. "I'd rather not…"

The boy laughed.

"What if I'd make you feel like you're the only girl in the world?"

She approached him… so close that she could easily kiss him.

"I don't believe that's the case … because I already know, that I'm the only girl in the world!"

The boy suddenly got intimidated. Rukia smiled and back off, making her way to her classroom.

"Girls, don't you ever fall for these lines" she said as she walked. But then she frowned as she saw in the threshold of her classroom, that boy with grey eyes. Cherry, was his name? There was something strange with his eyes …. And he kept starring at her with a curios expression. Rukia turned away her gaze and without a word she passed beside him and entered the classroom. She took the empty place next to Jennifer and put her IPad on the desk.

"You were brilliant!" Jennifer whispered.

"Give me a break! I haven't pretend so much ever since I was first send to the human world!" Rukia replied annoyed.

"Still, you were brilliant… I'm sure that you'll become the new icon of this highschool!"

Rukia turned to her with a worried expression.

"I hope not! I only put on this play so I won't get you in trouble … Don't you even think of taking this too far!"

Jennifer smiled.

"Relax, Rukia! It's just highshool! Enjoy yourself for once!"

Rukia turned her eyes annoyed, but then from distance she met once more, that guy, Cherry. He was starring. Again.

"You're annoying!" she whispered hoping that her words will make him mind his own business, but then her eyes widened as he saw a slight, amused smile on his face.

That smile… just seemed… so familiar. She turned her eyes to the black bored. She suddenly remembered Byakuya's look during morning, when she was waking up in his arms. She felt cold shivers on her back. Why now? Why would she remember something like this now? It's been years since she haven't thought about him… and his smoky, grey eyes.

Grey eyes?!

Her heart skipped a beat and suddenly turned again to that Cherry boy.

No, it would be impossible!

'_Rukia, pull yourself together_!"

But she kept starring at the boy, who was now paying attention to the black board.

"I'm bored, Rukia! Are practicing kido after this?" Jennifer asked.

And then Rukia came back to her senses.

"Y-yes…, of course! Right after I get out these ridiculous clothes!"

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* * *

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_That morning i've had that blurred dream again. I woke up trying to remember that women's name… but when I went to school there's this new girl…small, brunette, nerdish, appearing out of nowhere… and someone calls her "Rukia". In that moment something broke inside of my mind…_

_My dream became clear._

_I was bleeding. I was dying… and she was in front of me, dressed in a black Japanese kimono. With her face covered in blood she was kissing a rain of cherry petals. Somehow those petals seemed to be sharp like iron blades and they were hurting her, because she was crying. I tried to reach her, but I couldn't move. I wanted to save her, but I was powerless. And then I've heard myself speaking:_

"_Let me go…"_

_It wasn't my voice. It was an adult's voice. Deep…cold… hurt. It wasn't mine… but my numb lips were the one pronouncing the words… Those words…_

"_I love you, Rukia…"_

* * *

_**So that's it! I hope it will be better next time...( uuuuh,,,, still annoyed X( )**  
_


	13. Anouncement

_**Dear readers, this is not a chapter. It's just a little announcement I want to make, for those who are interested. If you all remember, this story started with Byakuya's death and a flashback from the moment he proposed Rukia.**_

_**The other story I'm working on ( A frozen ocean of rain) relates the events that lead to their marriage and it has reached (yesterday) the moment Byakuya actually proposed to her. If you are interested, you can find the whole proposing chapter there. The number of the chapter is 22, and it's entitled "While you thought we were together". It's a nice, classic byaruki chapter… for those who enjoy the canon Byakuya.**_

_**Thank you…**_

_**I will erase this announcement in a few days and replace it with a chapter **____**.**_


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